Let us say that you are a 35 y/o female and your Mother is 55 y/o.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

Let us continue this story further by saying that your Mother begins dating a 40 y/o man. They live an hour away. You have 2 younger brothers, ages 33 and 25. What would you think and/or feel about this situation?

[Gidney N Cloyd]

1. Go, Mom!

[eyesroll]

2. Assuming my mother isn't already married/partnered...

I'd probably be a little bit uncomfortable emotionally but I'd understand intellectually that it's none of my business.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

3. For the purpose of this scenario, if the Mother were married I would

have used the phrase "having an affair".

[TZ]

4. If he makes her happy it wouldn't bother me.

As long as two people are above the age of consent, age is not an issue to me...emotional maturity isn't tied to chronological age necessarily.

[seabeyond]

5. my brother, 48, had his just turned 18 yr old girlfriend move into his house with

his 16 and 14 yr old sons. and 20 yr old daughter with visits. there were problems. now they arent talking to each other and i am taking care of nieces baby instead of the grandpa with the 18 yr old girlfriend

[Tuesday Afternoon]

8. ~

:hug:

[skygazer]

6. I'd consider it none of my business and hope he made her happy

After all, if she didn't have children, would it be at all eye-raising for her to be seeing a man of that age? People get too hung up on age, imo (this coming from someone who once had a stepmother who was 7 years older than she was).

[ThomCat]

7. Once you are all adults age isn't that important.

:shrug:

If they like each other and they're happy, they should go for it, and I would hope you would be happy for them. :)

[NJmaverick]

9. If mom's happy, is there anything else to think?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

10. honestly, i would wonder if my discomfort is because i am slightly jealous

at a certain age, age differences seems to matter less (i think past 35 it starts mattering less)but if it bothered me, i would assume i am jealous of my mother

[Ptah]

11. I don't know, but I felt old this weekend.

My daughter's boyfriend's grandchild is two.

[mainegreen]

12. I'd say everyone over 30 is in the same group: old farts.

I'm in that group. Old farts shouldn't judge what other old farts do with third party old farts, and should also be mature enough to deal with it.

[mzteris]

13. i've been dating a guy for some time

who's a year younger than my daughter's fiance . . .

I won't say how old any of the party's are ('cause I don't want to say how old *I* am! lol), but my friend is 17 years younger than I am.

oh yeah, I also have 15 & 10 yo sons . . .


Quite frankly I seem to be the only one who ever has any kind of "hang up" about it. I sometimes worry what "other people think!" but that's becoming less and less. Most people think it's great and my female friends are all jealous. :D He's a wonderful man and I have a better relationship with him than I've ever had with anyone. (which isn't to say it's "perfect" 'cause it's not. We have our ups and downs just like any couple.)

The point is, if they're both happy and good for each other, what's the big deal anyway?

[LisaL]

14. The mother is an adult who is dating another adult.

Clearly at 40 he is well above the age of consent. So what's the big deal?

[Ptah]

16. It might be uncomfortable dating someone near your childrens' ages.

:shrug:

[LisaL]

17. For whom? The children? They are all adults and should get

over it.

[Ptah]

19. It would be uncomfortable for me to date someone that is

closer to my daughter's age than mine.

[LisaL]

20. Then by all means don't.

[Ptah]

21. Haven't yet.

[quakerboy]

15. prolly not much

now, if you were a 18 y/o female, and your mother was a 38 y/o female, and continued on that your mother was dating a 15 y/o woman, I would say you have a show for springer.

On the other hand, If I were a 30 y/o male, and my father was a 65 y/o male, and my father began dating a 18/yo female, I would kick his ass from here to Wednesday Morning. On so many levels, the first being that he is already married, and the second being that he is the last person who should date anyone younger as would suck any life remaining in them, and that he fits in much better with the 75+ crowd.

[Tangerine LaBamba]

18. If he's nice and he treats my Mom well,

and she's having a good time, I'd welcome him as a member of the family.

Age is a number, and only a number, once you're past the age of legal consent ......................

[Lydia Leftcoast]

22. Go for it, Mom!

I say this as one who is older than your mother. :-)

Years ago, I was in a relationship with someone ten years younger. I was uneasy about it, but then a friend said, "Does he know how old you are and does it bother him?"

"Yes, he knows, and no, it doesn't seem to bother him."

"Then why should it bother you?"

Just be glad your mother has a gentleman friend and isn't trying to micromanage your life (which is what my mother tried to do, with several states between us, until she married my stepfather).

[Happyhippychick]

23. My mom has been married four times. I wish I could say that I would "feel" any particular way

but you don't really know until you are in that position.

Too many variables exist to know how I would feel, age is probably one of the more harmless (for me). But perhaps what you are feeling has less to do with his age than the circumstances?

[marzipanni]

24. If the man seems to be a good person it would be fine with me

Fr'instance Susan Sarandon is 12 years older than Tim Robbins. They've been together for 21 years and are now 62 and 50 and seem to have a good relationship.

[haele]

25. How's this - my step-mother-in-law is 2 whole years older than I am -

Since she's his dad's fifth wife, Laz has given up getting wigged on them being younger and younger.

Of course, I'm 6 years older than Laz, so it is more than the 5 year's difference in your scenario.
His dad is just younger enough from my parents to have been babysitter age (11 - 15) when I was a baby.

Haele