My cat is dying....

[Khephra]

And what's worse about the situation is that I'm going to be be the one who decides if he lives or dies.

The poor cat has been with us for 16 years. A few months back, we found out that he had a brain toumor. The hope was that he'd die in his sleep....

Instead, he's just lost weight and now is coughing up blood.

I was the last person in charge of my grandmother when she died. Mom has said that it is my choice to keep Ares alive or not. ....the poor cat is coughing up blood. I don't know what to do....

[wryter2000]

1. Ask your vet's advice

That's what I'd do.

[trotsky]

2. Just put the cat's interests first.

Does he spend more time cuddling & purring, or more time spitting up and feeling miserable?

I had to put down my 7-yr-old after his kidney condition finally ruined his quality of life. Sure, we could have kept him going, but it would not have been enjoyable for him. He had suffered enough.

On edit: I would like to add that I think it is the ultimate sign of love for your pet to be able to let them avoid undue pain, no matter how much pain that will cause you.

[BlueEyedSon]

3. I have put down a few pets (sadly).

Usually my vet helped me make my decision.

Coughing up blood does not sound promising.

Best wishes & good luck,
Blue

[DenverDem]

4. Ares will tell you.

When he is in too much pain he will tell you.

This is the most devastating decision that a loving companion must make, but if it is made through compassion it is blessed.

I am praying for you and Ares.

I and my five companion cats are with you.

[SW FL Dem]

Denver is right

Ares will tell you. I have only had to make this decision once in my life, but I know I did the right thing. My Maggie(cairn terrier) let me know it was her time to go. I saw it in her eyes.

My Jamie(dsh) will be 16 on Tuesday. So far, so good. She has a thyroid problem but we are controlling it with meds.

[peacebuzzard]

45. And that is the truth...the baby will let you know ....

if he feels love and happy to be with you and is peaceful, then a natural goodbye is best. But if it is unbearably painful for the baby, either pain relievers are in order or if that does not help, well, another decision could be made. I am so sorry for you and your pet. I have been thru this several times. It is always sad to say goodbye to our friends.

[bookworm65t]

5. Keeping you in my thoughts today..

Having to decide whether or not to keep your cat alive much longer is very hard. I've been down that road before and it is not easy.

[VelmaD]

6. Talk to the vet

And then do whatever you have to to make your cats remaining days as happy and pain-free as possible.

:hug: I'm sorry you're having to go through this kef. :hug:

[Kathy in Cambridge]

7. If he's in pain, the best thing to do is let him go

I'm really sorry, kheph, that you've had to make these decisions. When Lulu was very sick in 2000, she got this very tired vibe-she was basically telling me to let her go. Have you consulted with a vet?

Best wishes to you and Ares-take care! :hug:

[stepnw1f]

8. I'm So Sorry Khephra

I have a really tight relationship with my cat, which is 15. I dread the day the little guy leaves me. He's a real friend to me. Once again, sorry about your loss.

Thank about him, and what he might ask you to do for him.

[Beetwasher]

9. It's Tough, I Know

I've been through it. Take him to the vet though right away and consult w/ the vet. They'll usually give you good advice...Sorry man...

[ps1074]

10. poor thing

I am so sorry to hear that, Kef.

You have to decide it for yourself but it might be better for the cat to put her to sleep. It was very difficult to me to put down my doggy 5 months ago, but I just couldn't see her suffering any more.

[nickinSTL]

11. Cat

I know how difficult a time this is. I had to put my cat to sleep a couple years ago, after 15 years together. I still have his picture on my desk at work.

It sounds like the time has come. It's a hard decision, but it sounds like he's likely in constant pain.

It's hard, but I've always known that I did the right thing.

My cat was 16, with pancreatitis he wasn't recovering from, and probably cancer that they couldn't find on an ultrasound. I knew he was just in too much pain.

May whatever deities you believe in, and friends and family comfort you.

[Rick Myers]

12. I'm sooo sorry...

I'd ask the vet's opinion. It's a REALLY hard thing to do to a friend that's been with you so long. If the cat is suffering, you've got to know that it's better to let him go... I lost my cat last year, and I feel your pain. I still can't bear to get another...

You'll do what's right, Kef... I'm thinkin' about ya'...

Rick

[ulysses]

13. man, I'm sorry

I've been there - we could've tried to keep Sonya alive, but even if they'd been successful in the short term, she'd have probably died in an unfamiliar place or alone and in pain. I agree with the others. Talk to the vet and think about Ares' quality of life.

Strength and peace.

[rvgwinn]

19. thoughts are with you.

My beautiful Raven is 11 years old, pure black German Shepherd. He has arthritis in his joints now. I have had several friends I had to give up. Its not easy, but letting them go is loving them.

[bleedingheart]

14. I am sorry

but I would take Ares to the vet and have the vet give you his/her advice.
If the cat is in pain and is coughing up blood I think that the best thing to do would be to have Ares put to sleep....

We had to do that with a dog so I know how hard this is....she had such horrible back problems that it was the only solution to how much pain she was in.

[aquart]

15. It's time, hon.

The one to ask is your cat. There's a look in the eyes that says Do Something.

Has your cat ever lived a day without love or food or shelter since you got him?

He's had a good life. Now there's one last thing to do.

He's suffering and you love him. It's time.

[Andy_Stephenson]

20. I agree...

if his quality of life has diminished...Time to let him go. I know it is ahrd...but it sounds like he will be better off.

:hug:

[Kadie]

16. I am so sorry.

A few months back I lost my cat at age 18. He had health problems for years. And like you said, I was just hoping he would go in his sleep. But instead he just kept getting worse, there were more bad days than good days. But he seemed OK with what was going on with him.

Then one day everything was different. He just gave me this look, he was tired of fighting. I just knew it was time and I took him to the vet that day. I talked to the vet and she agreed that it was time.

I am so sorry for what you are going through.

Peace to you and your kitty.

[WillParkinson]

17. I'm so sorry...

Please accept my sympathies.

Know that your cat loves you and knows that you will do what is right.

[SOteric]

18. I'm going through something similar with my 19 year old cat.

His kidneys are failing and the vet gives him maybe another 5 - 6 months in the best case scenario.

The little dude is rapidly losing weight, however and frequently dehydrates.

I feel for you. It breaks my heart several times a day just to think about losing my little buddy.

I think for me, the deciding factor is quality of life. I know he won't be completely comfortable again, but I don't want him in pain and agony. I think when the time comes that he spends more of his time in pain than he does in relative comfort, I will let go of him.

Your vet should be able to guide you in making a determination about his comfort, and close observations of kitty's behaviour will help. You know when he's not feeling well.

:hug:

I'm sorry, kheph. They touch us deeply for such short-lived creatures, don't they?

[soleft]

21. I'm sorry Kheph

I had a cat with a brain tumor who was seizing. It's very hard. We put her to sleep.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

22. I feel for you Keph,,it is such a tough choice

but it sounds like it's time. He's not happy and has no quality of life...it's a shame humans don't all seem to be trustworthy of being this humane with other humans when there's only suffering left.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

27. My heart is breaking for you

I went through a similar situation last August with my Fergus (different illness, but old age and knowing he was dying). I had made an appointment to have him put to sleep, but he and God decided I should cancel the appointment, as he died peacefully in my arms early that morning.

As others have said, let your kitty tell you what to do. If he seems comfortable and to still enjoy life somewhat, I would just love him to death. If he seems miserable and starts hiding or not wanting to be with you, it's probably time. Ferg developed a strange high-pitched meow in his last few days; his normal meow was very raspy, but he started this weird cry that told me he needed serious help to leave this world (at least it seemed that way to me). He stopped eating and became delirious and flailed around when I picked him up.

Best of luck to you. I know how heart-wrenching this is. My prayers go out to you and your cat.

[Coventina]

23. Sending caring thoughts...

I had to put my 18 year old cat down several years ago.
She had a stroke sometime during the night. I found her struggling on the floor in the morning, paralyzed down one side of her body.
I don't know how many hours she suffered like that. :cry:


I agree with the previous posters here, you will know when it is time. It will still be gut-wrenching, though.
Peace be unto you and Ares.
:hug:

[silverlib]

24. My thoughts are with you

and whatever road you choose. It's a tough decision. Peace to you and yours.

[TheBlob]

25. Sorry to hear Keph

:-(

[SoCalDem]

26. Aaaw.. Kef.. Don't wait.. It needs to be done

Cats rarely cough, and for him to be coughing up blood, it's time..The poor little thing will not get better...only worse, and if you get up some morning to find him gone, you will feel badl;y that you did not help him..

It's not as hard as you imagine.. He won;t even know.. You can hole him in your lap, and they just drift off..No more pain...

He can't be enjoying life much the way he is.. :hug:

[ronnykmarshall]

28. I am so sorry.

It's a tough thing to do, but if he is in pain and coughing up blood it's best that he is out of pain and at peace.

Sending cyber :hug: to you.

I know what you're feeling right now.

[Butterflies]

29. it's a terribly sad choice

my almost-5-year-old dog is at the vet's today having her first chemotherapy treatment for canine lymphoma, so I've been consumed by thoughts of pet mortality for 2 weeks now - and I cry a lot. Since my dog is so young and her chances for a recovery of one year are 75%, I'm trying whatever I can. I've been reading stories on the internet that were written by owners of dogs that have had canine lymphoma, and they all say your pet will let you know when it is time for them to go. Your cat is older and has lived a good life, maybe she's letting you know it's time to end but you have been too upset to see it?
I'm sorry you are going through this. You, your vet, and your cat will make the right decision.

[LynneSin]

30. $220 roundtrip from Indy to Baltimore

(only cause I'm picking up GOP in BWI at night and I could get you too).

Check out Southwest Airlines. April 23rd til we'll figure it out.

Lynne

[curlyred]

31. we lost our cat a few weeks ago

He was very old and sick. After several recent trips to the vet which he hated, we decided to just let him die at home. We tried to keep him as comfortable as possible, and he didn't appear to be in any pain.

If your cat is in pain and cannot be kept comfortable, then you will have to decide what is the humane thing to do.

Either way, I am sorry for your potential loss and for this sad experience.

[The Magistrate]

32. My thoughts are with you

On edit: posted by SheWhoMustBeObeyed. Realized at the very last second I was posting on M's login and tried to cancel, but the machine was too quick. OTOH, he felt bad about the kitty too.

My little old grey tabby had a brain tumor that paralyzed half her face, and she shrank to nothing but fur and bones. I too hoped she'd die in her sleep, but no, and the tumor kept growing. It was a very difficult decision to take her to the vet's that last time. Sorry to hear you're facing it too.

[flamingyouth]

33. I'm so sorry, Kef

It really sucks to have to make this decision. We lost our beloved Chester two months ago and it was so hard, but we could no longer stand to see him suffer the way he was. Oh damn, I feel bad for you today. :hug:

[commander bunnypants]

34. My friend what a hard decision in which i recently made.

Do what is best for your kitten. and know you and Ares are loved by DU. Rest assured Sebastian Cattbutt will meet up with Ares and show him around in kitty heaven.

:hugs:


DDQM

[havocmom]

35. Strength to you from the furries and me

Sometimes the measure of our love and devotion to another is how we face taking on loss for their sake.

Am sure the souls of Smudge and Havoc are with me when I need them. Kheph, love doesn't die when the vessel wears out. Smudge taught me that in a manner this ol cynic had to acknowledge. Havoc taught me that a gentleman knows when it is time and can go out with class and dignity.

Keeping you in my thoughts and heart as you face this.

Check out a book called Goodbye, friend. It may help you bear your pain and give you some comfort.

[WI_DEM]

36. Very sorry to hear this

I have a 15 year old cat and so far so good, but when the day comes it will be very tough. My feeling is if he is has a brain tumor, is losing weight, and coughing up blood--the humane thing may be to end his misery, but that doesn't make it any easier.

[ET Awful]

37. I'm so sorry to here it Khephra :(

You have to do what's best for Ares. Trust your instincts on this one.

Thoughts and good energy headed your way from me (and Quinn).

:hug:

[Pattib]

38. So sorry, I lost my two cats last year within months of each other.

Max was only 6 yrs. old. He had kidney failure. He died in his sleep after months of treatment.

Our second cat died of a brain tumor. We didn't even know she was ill. One day she gave out a horrible meow and we noticed her right eye was clouded. She was blinded and bumping into everything. She suffered a massive siezure and died. This all happened in about a two hour time span. At least it was quick and she didn't suffer.

I didn't want to think about adopting another animal. Last month our freaky neighbors were finally forced out by foreclosure and abandoned a box of kittens. We kept hearing high pitched meows coming from the woods beside their house. There were six grey and white kittens. I wanted to keep them all. I found homes for five of them and kept one for myself.
It's a horrible feeling when a pet dies. I felt sick inside for a long time. Thoughts are with you.

[VOX]

39. This is so difficult, Kef...but the cat is suffering badly...

Please take him to the vet to give him the peace he needs.

It's awfully hard when we have to say goodbye to our cross-species friends. I'm so very sorry, Kef.

Hang in there --

[CatWoman]

40. Poor Ares

:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

don't let him suffer, Kef.

[davsand]

41. Letting go is how we repay the years of love they give.

Our pets love us and accept us even when we feel bad about ourselves. The pets are our unconditional love. I'll grant you, we feed them and we do that litter box thing--but they really demand very little of us in return for all that love. Until it comes time to let them go...

Tillie(you bitch) was 17 when I lost her and she'd been with me for all the major events in my life--good AND bad. I still miss her and I weep now remembering how it felt to have to let her go. The thing I came to with her, finally, was that letting her go, and letting her be free of illness and pain was how I re payed all those years of love she gave me.

May your path brighten soon, and may your pain pass quickly. I am sorry.

Laura

[Ganja Ninja]

42. I'm a firm believer in not letting pets suffer.

16 years is a pretty good run for a cat. It sounds to me like it's time to have it put down. I know it a hard thing to do but you need to do it for the animals sake. Go out and get a new one right away and it will help you get over the loss a lot easier.

[undergroundpanther]

43. I feel for you...

I had to put my Bigfoot to sleep last year. He had cancer.
His last days were spent under the couch, in pain.I know he was in the living room where he could feel safe but hear everything going on because he was hurting but wanted to be around us too. Our two other cats Rustle and Sparkle were doing a deathwatch over him,and not leaving him alone.
after two days of this under the couch,
I fed him some salmon water because it was his favorite thing,and he looked at me and I saw in his eyes it was time to go. The next day we took him to the vet. And we were there with him holding him until the last moments. I saved the fur they shaved off his arm to inject him,.I miss him still.I have dreams with Bigfoot in them.
Once you have a cat there is a cat shaped place in your heart only for that cat,I like to think when a catfreind dies,a piece of your spirit goes to live within their spirit and that is partly why it hurts so much to see a loved one go away from this sad,flawed sick,world.When you lose a piece of spirit in a world hellbent on crushing it,every bit of that spark,love and beauty that goes away from here into to better realms hurts you while you are here in this realm of suffering.
Your cat's spirit may be going to a place where bodies do not exist,where they do not get sick,where coughing up blood doesn't exist and never has or will.

[Khephra]

44. This is going to be hard to watch

I'm cryin

[proud patriot]

46. I lost my cat of 19 years last year

if I could of taken away some of the suffering
in the final hours I would have .

I have that regret to live with .

I send you strength for the coming days