Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

God knocked up Mary for one reason only...

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU
 
Drunken Irishman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 12:23 AM
Original message
God knocked up Mary for one reason only...
So that we'd have a whole week of holiday parties with LIQUOR!

weeeee!

:party:

:toast:


Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
rcrush Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 12:38 AM
Response to Original message
1. Did the three wisemen bring any weed?
I bet they did. Like way back in the day I bet they had some good hash.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 03:12 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. They brought incense.
Who burns incense? People who want to cover up even stinkier burning things.

And hippies, who weren't invented yet. Jesus lucked out on that one.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Sebastian Doyle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 05:38 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. Jesus invented hippies
Long hair, sandals, talked about peace a lot, quit his job to go on the road, etc. :hippie:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 09:34 AM
Response to Reply #3
8. Jesus was the original hippie
which makes me laugh when I see the way the fundie nut jobs make the guy out to be.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 05:36 PM
Response to Reply #8
16. Like this?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
tigereye Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 03:59 PM
Response to Reply #2
14. I just bought some frankincense at my local Middle Eastern store -
thought it might be interesting to see what it actually smells like. I remember making fake gold and various Wise-men gifts for the living Nativity when I was a kid.


I think incense was much more rare and sought-after back when.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
sarge43 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 06:45 AM
Response to Original message
4. He turned water into wine
and that walking on water trick. You have to be seriously baked to try that.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Jeff In Milwaukee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 08:55 AM
Response to Original message
5. Spoken like a true Irishman!
Except that online it's hard to tell how slurred your speech is.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ThatsMyBarack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 09:22 AM
Response to Original message
6. Only ONE WEEK?
Doesn't the Xmas season start November 1st these days? :shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
rurallib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 10:49 AM
Response to Reply #6
10. give some respect to the dead. The holiday season starts Oct.31
With HALLOWEEN!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
unpossibles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 09:23 AM
Response to Original message
7. hell yeah
except you misspelled "month"

I'm no duffer.

:D
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Deep13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 10:38 AM
Response to Original message
9. JOE: If you're pregnant and we haven't had sex yet...
...that must mean it was a miracle from God!

MARY: Um, sure, let's go with that.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
petronius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 11:31 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. I've always wondered what her backup explanation was going to be,
if the 'miracle' thing didn't work. I bet it would have been a doozy... :shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
guitar man Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 12:10 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. Announcing the invention of
the first turkey baster? :shrug:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 03:55 PM
Response to Original message
13. I love the holiday season because of the time off.
Next week I only have to work two days then I'm off to Arizona. :woohoo:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 04:30 PM
Response to Original message
15. Naah. Mary was just thinking on her feet.
"Yes I'm pregnant out of wedlock because ... because ... Um ... GOD did it! Yeah, that's the ticket!"
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Yavin4 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-14-09 06:00 PM
Response to Original message
17. Didn't Use A Rubber?
I promise. I'll pull out. Trust me. I'm God.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Thu Dec 26th 2024, 09:05 PM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC