First, what IS a Kessel? And how DO you make it run?

[arbusto_baboso]

And finally, isn't a parsec a measure of distance?

[Iggo]

1. Oh no you di'int.

:rofl:

[arbusto_baboso]

2. I'm allowed to ask these questions. I'm a huge Star Wars geek.

But some of the inconsistencies still bother me.

[HopeHoops]

3. The thing where Luke asks Leia about her mother and the death at birth thing...

... has always made me wonder why they didn't stop and ask each other, "Hey, don't you think the fans will figure out that this is a fucked up inconsistency?"

[arcadian]

8. Wait...

Which part is that? In 'Jedi'?

[HopeHoops]

12. In Jedi and Revenge of the Sith.

Pardon my spelling of names. I'm not going to go look all of this shit up.

While they are with the Ewoks, Luke asks Leia about her mother and she says something like "She died when I was very young. I just remember that she was always sad."

In Sith, Padme dies at birth. That's fucked up, since Leia couldn't possibly remember her.

Another hard thing to reconcile is the comment by the commander of the first Death Star to Darth about Obi Wan, "Surely he must be dead by now." Obi Wan wasn't that old when Anakin turned to the dark side. Luke is supposed to be something like 18 or 19 in "A New Hope", so Obi Wan might be in his 60's at most, but probably more in the 50's range.

And why is it that a little Tie Fighter explodes with a small supernova and large ships just sort of go "poof"?

Okay, okay, it is a fucking science fiction series. But I do wonder why they let this shit get through. It just seems so obvious.

[gmoney]

16. well, the differing explosions MIGHT make sense

The type of power source, sheilding, how the power source is destroyed/ignited, size of the power source relative to the ship, etc.

Put an M80 in a soup can and it will blow the can to bits, but put it in a dumpster and probably won't damage the dumpster.

[gmoney]

9. Yeah... how DOES one get to be a "Princess" without royal parents? Or ANY parents?

Marry a prince, of course, but that would mean she's married. So, wouldn't that make Vader some sort of King? or at least a Prince? (I don't think the daughter of a Lord is a Princess.) And how would she ascend to the position of Princess without pretty well documented lineage and either Mother or Father in power to establish her as Princess?

And are Leia and Luke supposed to be siblings, or half-siblings (from different mothers?)

Guess I never even stopped to consider that stuff for the past 30 years or so.

[HopeHoops]

14. She sure as shit acted like one!

And I don't mean in the "proper and refined" sense of the word.

[gmoney]

15. So, she's just a Druish-American Princess?

At least in Spaceballs, the princess' father was a King.

[HopeHoops]

21. Have you ever seen "Hardware Wars"? Early Star Wars spoof.

I saw it at Balticon the same year I saw Dark Star. That was a weird Sci Fi convention. There was a rather well-endowed woman wearing nothing but a cleverly-placed boa constrictor. The thing must have weighed 50 lbs. I owned one until he was about 4 1/2' long and started looking at the cat sideways. He was heavy. Fortunately, my biology teacher had a daughter who loved snakes and had a huge apartment.

Anyway, "Hardware Wars" is just plain funny. Cookie Monster (orange) fills in for Chewbacka.

Part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlFOiFLLd0g
Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UVVBctvylU

ALSO - it way pre-dates Spaceballs and ends with "May the Farce Be With You", so Mel stole that one.

I couldn't find the complete Dark Star video clip, but I didn't look all that long.

[arcadian]

17. No the LA law guy and his wife are her foster parents.

I think they are royalty.

[gmoney]

25. Foster Princess?

I guess it worked for Moses.

[SteppingRazor]

4. The ultra-geek answer:

Yes, it's a unit of distance, but the Kessel run is laden with a thick asteroid field, and so each pilot that goes through the run has to map his or her own course. Thus, the shortest course possible is the most impressive. (This also explains why Solo was so good at dodging asteroids in the escape from Hoth in Episode V.

Geek out! :freak:

[Aristus]

19. Time to disclose my Star Wars geeky-ness: The hyperspace approach paths to Kessel

take traveling ships perilously close to a network of black holes. The closer you are to the black holes, the greater the danger of either being sucked in or torn to pieces. However, the closer you get to the network without suffering mishap, the shorter the run, the lower the per-trip cost, and therefor the higher the profit from the spice run. Solo never says where the measurement of twelve parsecs to Kessel originates; but it could be Tatooine, since that is the hub of Jabba The Hutt's Outer Rim Territories spice distribution network.

[Capn Sunshine]

28. Yep, you win

that was ultra in its Star Wars geekiness and can not be topped

[Aristus]

29. You're welcome!

;-)

[gmoney]

5. yeah, that bugged me, too...

I figure either Ford botched the line, but they liked his delivery so let it stand -- or maybe Lucas was trying to make him sound like a bullshitter (which he obviously is).

"12 Parsecs... Yeah, that's the ticket!"

[arcadian]

7. Why are Homo Sapiens in a galaxy far, far, away?

And how do bipedal hairy dogs(Wookies) get the ability to travel in space?

[gmoney]

11. Well, monkeys have "travelled" in space on man-made ships... anyone can be a passenger.

Maybe Wookies are some sort of galactic bodyguard race, recruited for strength and charming personalities. And communication skills.

[Mad_Dem_X]

6. My sister and I had that whole scene memorized.

She would say Han Solo's lines, and I would say Luke's and Ben Kenobi's. One time, the two of us and a friend acted out the scene in front of my parents. Yes, we were SW geeks.

[Dr. Strange]

10. Little-known tidbit about Episode 4.

During the briefing about attacking the Death Star, a character named Quizi Pevdar says, "Hey, what about instead of flying along the trench, we just make a direct pass at the thermal exhaust port?"
The rebels laugh at him.
He says, "Think about it, it would avoid all the laser towers along the trench, and be much more direct."
At this point, Luke takes out his light saber and slices Quizi in half.

Lucas cut the scene because he didn't like the idea of Luke being so hot-headed.

[gmoney]

13. Yeah, I think that's in the special features of the first DVD release... ;)

They also cut the scene where R2D2 offers to trigger a self-destruct sequence in the Death Star, or at least force the nuclear core to overheat, or otherwise fuck that shit up while he was jacked into the central computer.

Lucas didn't like the way C3PO sounded when he said "fuck that shit up" and cut the scene.

[MissMillie]

18. Actually, I think this is a Kessel

[Forkboy]

22. Booooo....hissssss!

:)

[Call Me Wesley]

20. Other geeks have chimed in before me, so here:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Kessel_Run

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

23. "Kessel" is a pot.

It was used to describe the completely encircled German Sixth Army during the Battle of Stalingrad, kind of like a pot on a fire. With the Sixth Army completely cut off, Hitler and Goering devised a plan to resupply the 6th army with a convoy of supply planes, flying day and night. The plan was unsuccessful, futile really, and the 6th army ended up surrendering to the Red Army. The flight in and out of Stalingrad, i.e. the Kessel Run, would have been fraught with danger due to anti-aircraft fire, Soviet fighters, bad weather, etc.

Lucas, having already borrowed heavily from WWII (the TIE fighter attack on the Millenium Falcon was based almost shot for shot on bomber footage, the "trench run" was based on an attack on a dam, the ceremony scene at the end was from The Triumph of the Will), probably just through in the term "Kessel Run" from something he'd read.

[Fire Walk With Me]

24. The vessel done the kessel has the crew which is true.

Hawkins: I've got it! I've got it! The pellet with the poison's in the vessel with the pestle; the chalice from the palace has the brew that is true! Right?
Griselda: Right. But there's been a change: they broke the chalice from the palace!
Hawkins: They *broke* the chalice from the palace?
Griselda: And replaced it with a flagon.
Hawkins: A flagon...?
Griselda: With the figure of a dragon.
Hawkins: Flagon with a dragon.
Griselda: Right.
Hawkins: But did you put the pellet with the poison in the vessel with the pestle?
Griselda: No! The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon! The vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true!
Hawkins: The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon; the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true.
Griselda: Just remember that.

-"The Court Jester"

[baldguy]

26. Kessel is a place.

And the "Kessel Run" is a route that is normally 18 parsecs in length.

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Kessel_Run

[kentauros]

27. I'm guessing their use of "parsecs" is the same as those that improperly use

"light years" as a measure of time, as if light-years are somehow longer than regular years :P

[bluedigger]

30. A Kessel is...

Oh wait, that's a Kugle...

:hide: