If you had asked me 2 hours ago if it was possible to blow up a pot of beans, I would have said no.

[man4allcats]

However, I now know better. I'd been brewing this latest pot for a few evenings now, and I noticed as I have recently with other similar attempts that no matter how long I cook the beans they don't seem to soften up. So I figured, "Well, someone out there on the internets knows the answer to this." After a quick Google search, I learned that if the beans you're cooking have been sitting in the cupboard for awhile, they can in fact get stale in which case no matter how long you cook them they just won't soften up. But alas, there is a way. Just add a little baking soda to the mix to produce the desired effect. Apparently the alkalinity produced by the baking soda does the trick. I think the recommended amount was something like a half teaspoon, but I figured if half a teaspoon was good, a rounded teaspoon would be better (it was after all a big pot of beans) so I dumped it in there, mixed it up, turned on the heat and went into the living room to watch TV. After awhile I thought I'd better check the progress. Turns out I probably should have done that sooner. When the water reached a healthy boil the baking soda started bubbling itself as baking soda is wont to do (I forgot about that), and the mixture boiled out of the pot and over most of the stove top. It didn't actually explode in the classic sense of that term, but the end result was quite similar. On the upside though, what remained of the beans was actually quite good and did in fact soften up nicely. The moral to this story is, if you use baking soda to soften up old beans, be wary of the amount of baking soda you add and pay attention while you're cooking. So ends this episode of "Another Evening in the Kitchen With a Single Guy." B-)

[Orrex]

1. Truly the magical fruit.

[RoyGBiv]

20. The more you eat, the more you toot ...

The more you toot, the better you feel.

So EAT THEM BEANS AT EVERY MEAL!

[MadMaddie]

2. Do you let you beans soak in water overnight

before you cook them? It releases some of the gas and it seems to help to make them softer once you start boiling them the next day.

We don't add baking soda, we usually add a chopped onion and a ham hock or two or three and let them cook all day on low heat..

[man4allcats]

6. I do typically use the overnight soak method,

but these beans had been in the cupboard for awhile. I think they were well passed much benefit from soaking overnight. Thanks for the onion/ham hock tip though. I'll have to give that a try. It's bound to be safer for me than baking soda. :D

[phasma ex machina]

21. Besides soaking overnight a crock pot also minimizes (eliminates) soy bean foam fail.

[Love Bug]

3. Don't salt them, either, until they are cooked soft cuz that toughens them up

When I saw the thread title, I thought this was going to be a story about blowing up beans in a pressure cooker!

You are correct, though about old beans. The older they are, the longer it takes to cook them. Best to buy new each year after harvest and use 'em up.

[hedgehog]

4. I was pressure cooking beets one time, and the little

spout plugged up, then blew beets all over my ceiling.

[man4allcats]

8. Yeah, those pressure cookers! I love those things.

They're always good for a laugh. :7

[jobycom]

5. This belongs on some web page for hilarious stories you run across on the Internet.

Well, okay, the Lounge will work. :rofl: Great story, greater telling. :thumbsup:

[Jamastiene]

7. So, I take it that if I suggest cleaning the drains with

baking soda and vinegar to you, I should emphasize that you add the vinegar, then slowly add the baking soda. Otherwise, you'll be swimming in the results. :P

[man4allcats]

10. Yes, thank you. The emphasis is noted and appreciated.

Never take anything for granted when it comes to me and kitchens. Remember Tim the Tool Man Taylor? I'm that guy in the kitchen. :D

[kimi]

9. Thanks for this info

I've got some beans in my pantry that are about 6 years old. Heirloom, rare, supposed to taste ambrosia-ish after cooking.

I've been hoping for a magical method that would bring them back from the dead. Oh well. Time to toss.

[man4allcats]

11. Oh come on! Where's your sense of adventure?

I did it! Only took me an hour and a half to clean up the mess! :7

[astral]

13. Don't toss your beans jus tbecause they're in the pantry!

It depends on how they were stored. Perfectly dried food can keep a long time, if not exposed to light or moisture or excess air (i.e., sealed up in a container)

[kimi]

18. They've been stored for umpteen years in moisture-proof tupperware stuff

I know that some beans can be brought back to life, so I suppose if they were cooked long enough they'd be somewhat edible. Or, since I garden, I could throw a few in the ground next year. I am sort of curious as to what they'd do, but my family - the anti-gourmets that they are - doesn't give me much chance to actually use beans.

[astral]

12. I soak mine overnight in water with a little bit of vinegar

Then I usually 'crock-pot' them on low all day or for six hours or so but if that isn't enough time I would really wonder. I didn't know they could get too stale to cook soft.

[Heidi]

14. My sister once nearly destroyed our mom's kitchen cooking beans in a pressure cooker.

A pressure cooker lid, once set into motion by, well, PRESSURE, is heavy enough to destroy a quality metal range hood, interestingly enough.

[HopeHoops]

15. If you do split peas in a pressure cooker, make sure you add enough water.

My late grandmother learned this when the rocker blew off and split pea goo left through the vent nozzle like it was a Super Soaker. The ceiling was covered in split peas and they rained down over her head. Yes, that sounds funny. She, however, was not amused.

[UTUSN]

16. I actually DID explode an electric stove, documented right here in the Lounge

Can't provide the link, but I put a thin-aluminum pot to boil for my first and only attempt at chicken soup. A hole developed in the thin metal, leaking liquid onto the element, and PRESTO!1 EXPLOSION!1 Sparking, the works!1

I was in the next room on DU and after the panic was over, posted it and a kind DUer still remembered it the next time I posted about another cooking exploit.

[pokerfan]

17. You need to send an email

to these guys:

[JCMach1]

19. We had a mashed-potato geyser last week....

weirdness all around