My Dad passed away yesterday.

[annabanana]

Eleven years after suffering a stroke that had left him with difficulty walking, he fell at home and broke his hip. Once that was repaired at the hospital, difficulties and complications cascaded down upon him until his dear 89 year old body couldn't make a come back.

From Hospital to rehab center and back to the ER he went, each move causing him a little more confusion. But in the ER he did, one more time, manage to take the best possible care of my Mother and her tender feelings.

Their 62nd Anniversary had been on December 22nd. They had met when he got home from the war and my Aunt introduced him to Mom as "that cute Vet" she knew. They were smitten and married soon after. They moved from Ann Arbor to Park Forest, and from there to Lexington Mass and later to New Jersey.. having children and building and good life along the way. With each move, he went ahead.. Mom's "advance man", scouting out neighborhoods, investigating school districts, making sure that he brought his young family to the very best place he could provide.

When we were standing above this wonderful man in the ER as he drifted in and out of consciousness, Mom told me that Doctors had been asking her what were her "expectations" for results. She told me she knew they were asking about DNR orders. Daddy overheard this, and in what was just about his final communicative moment, told her that she should "let him go". I knew what he meant, as I had seen his eyes when he heard our conversation. Mom thought he meant that he wanted to go "out of the hospital".. Then she stopped, looked into his eyes and asked "Do you mean what I was just talking about?" and he looked at her and said, clearly. . . yes.

So as his final act, he took the pain of the decision onto himself, as he had for their whole lives together. The straps and needles and tubes and tapes were gently removed and he was moved one last time to the Hospice and made as comfortable as possible.

He left us soon after, Mom's advance man once again.
I will miss him so terribly terribly much.

Daddy's little girl, always...
Ann

[Robeson]

1. I'm so sorry, annabanana...

...:hug: :grouphug:

[auntAgonist]

2. Ann, I'm so sorry for your loss ..

What wonderful parents you had. He'll always be with you. May you all find peace in his passing.

My sincerest condolences to all of you.
:hug:
aA
kesha

[annabanana]

4. Thank you so much

annabanana was his pet name for me... I guess I always have been a "Daddy's Girl".. though I didn't really realize it until now.

[Bicoastal]

3. What a sad Christmas this must be for you and yours.

So sorry.

:hug:

[annabanana]

6. It is just one Christmas.

We had many good ones.

The support troops are beginning to gathered to come to our emotional rescue. But right now it's just me and Mom & my sister. Dear Lord, I am the strong one.

But it seems I'm not. .

[Mari333]

35. Its okay to fall apart and not be strong

strength will come in time, let yourself be a mess when you need to be a mess.
hugs and love from me.

[Brickbat]

5. You're in my thoughts.

What a lovely story you shared, though. Thank you for that. May your memories be a comfort.

[HipChick]

7. So sorry for your loss..

[NoPasaran]

8. Well, that's terrible

I lost my dear old dad this July, after he'd been in decline for seven or so years. You can think you're ready for it but you really aren't. Miss you, Dad.

[seabeyond]

9. beautiful. beautiful tribute to a wonderful man. thank you for sharing. nt

[Redstone]

10. My sincere condolences to you and yours.

Redstone

[rockymountaindem]

11. I'm sorry for your loss

Best wishes :hug:

What did he do in the war?

[annabanana]

13. Thank you

He went into Normandy on (I think) D-Day+5 .. He wrote some great accounts of setting up provisional governments in the wake of the Nazi's rout as they moved forward..

[rockymountaindem]

14. Wow. As a political science student and WWII fanatic that sounds really interesting

Maybe you could find some way to get his writings published. They could provide valuable research fodder for someone like me someday!

[annabanana]

15. Maybe someday

He wrote poetry too.

[yourguide]

12. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Big hugs to you.

[Haole Girl]

16. Oh Ann...

I'm so sorry

:hug:

[RevCheesehead]

17. What a beautiful tribute you wrote.

He must have been a remarkable man. You were truly fortunate to have him as your daddy.
God bless you during this time, and may you find true comfort and peace in the memories and stories shared about him. Remember, too, that a part of him lives in you and the rest of your family. :hug:

Peace be with you.
Ruth

[ccharles000]

18. ...

:hug:

[velvet]

19. he went well

I raise my glass to him, and to you annabanana.

[Lex]

20. He sounds like a phenomenal person.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Patiod]

21. they sound like they had a good life together

we should all be so lucky to find someone like that. It must be a very hard time for you and your mom.

[Flaxbee]

22. Oh, annabanana, I'm so sorry. He sounds like a wonderful

and caring man. My condolences to you and your family, may you all find some peace and comfort in his long and happy life. :hug: to you and your mom.

[SeattleGirl]

23. My condolences to you and yours, Anna.

:hug:

[UrbScotty]

24. I am so, so sorry, dear Ann.

:hug:

At least he does not suffer anymore.

[laylah]

25. Oh Ann,

I am so sorry for your loss :hug:

[Vidar]

26. My condolences.

[mtnester]

27. I am so sorry

no matter how old you are, everyone becomes 5 when their parents die

(((((HUGS))))))

[Maraya1969]

28. Your dad sounded like a great man. I'm so sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[mdmc]

29. My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours

Peace and low stress..

[sarge43]

30. Condolences Ann

Your father was a good man; no finer thing can be said.

Strength and comfort to you and your mother. And a :patriot: for your father. Safe passage.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

31. Oh Ann my dear friend

Loving thoughts and vibes for your loss. I am so sorry. :hug: :hug: :loveya: :hug: :hug:

Hugs for everyone please.

[GoCubsGo]

32. I am sorry.

My condolences and a big hug.

[mnhtnbb]

33. Oh, Annab...I have tears for you and your Mom. What a wonderful

father he must have been.

:hug:

[peekaloo]

34. Condolences.

:hug:

[fizzgig]

36. i am so very sorry for your loss, anna

this is a wonderful tribute to a wonderful man

:hug: from one daddy's little girl to another

[hippywife]

37. Dear Ann...

Sweetest, I am so sorry for your loss. Your words make apparent the love for your father and his for all of you. And I am so happy that you had that love to share with one another all those many years from such a selfless man. Nothing more special than the bond between a father and his daughter, not even that with a son.

May the days ahead be gentle on you all. Please know that this hurt, while it will never leave you, will become bearable in the days ahead, when bidden or not, memories will cause a smile to replace the tears. Hold each other close and KNOW those days are coming. :hug:

[DainBramaged]

38. I hope he and my Mom have a nice conversation..........

:hug:

[Dystopian]

39. My heartfelt condolences....

annabanana~
So very sorry for the loss of your beloved father...
Keeping you and your family in my thoughts..



peace~

[blueamy66]

40. I am so sorry Ann.

My cousin is another "Anna Banana".

My prayers are with you and your family.

[nuxvomica]

41. My condolences, Annabanana

A beautiful tribute. :cry: :hug:

[Call Me Wesley]

42. Safe passage to your dad.

May he be free from suffering. peace and comfort to you and yours, aannabanana. :hug:

[dgibby]

43. Ann,

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I,too, was a Daddy's girl, and still am even though I'm 64 and he's been gone for many years. Some things never change. Cherish your memories of him, and when the time comes, try to put them into writing if you can so they can be kept alive and shared with generations to come.

Peace and comfort to you and your family.:grouphug:

[guitar man]

44. So sorry to hear

:(. :hug:

[tigereye]

45. I am so sorry!

[Ikonoklast]

46. I salute your father's service to this nation.

I also salute his success in being a husband and father, as your loving testimony to him presented as evidence.

Safe passage to your father, and peace to your family, Ann.

[helderheid]

47. I am so very sorry.

[derby378]

48. ChickMagic and I are so sorry for your loss

:grouphug:

[GreenPartyVoter]

49. I am sorry for your loss. *hugs*

[bigwillq]

50. I am very sorry for your loss.

:hug:

[Minimus]

51. I am so sorry for your loss. You did your daddy proud by what you wrote.

Please take care of yourself and know you and your family are in my thoughts.

[Odin2005]

52. OMG, I'm so sorry!

What AWFUL, horrible timing. :(

[NNadir]

53. It is not easy to lose a parent...ever.

But as we all must die, we are lucky to be surrounded by love when we go. Clearly that happened here.

May you celebrate a life well lived.

Condolences.

[dugaresa]

54. my condolences

[LeftyFingerPop]

55. I'm so sorry, anna

:hug:

[madrchsod]

56. he`ll always be with you......

[babylonsister]

57. Your dad is a giant, and I am really sorry for your loss. Ann,

:hug:

[WinkyDink]

58. {{annabanana}}. What a fine tribute!

[es350_ibm]

59. may he rest in peace

[debbierlus]

60. I am so sorry for your loss....so, so sorry

[LibDemAlways]

61. Heartfelt condolences, Ann.

It's always difficult to lose a loved one, but losing a loved one during such a joyous, festive time of the year is especially hard. My thoughts are very much with you and your family.

I hope you will find comfort and peace in many wonderful memories of your dad. Your tribute is very moving.

[PlanetBev]

62. My sympathies and empathies, Ann

My 88 year old dad passed away on December 14th from congestive heart failure. We were able to spend one more week with him after he entered the hospital. We were agonizing over hospice arrangements for him, when he went into cardiac arrest. He told us earlier in the week that if he got better, he wanted to go home. If not, he was ready to die. There was no doubt in my mind that he made the decision for us, as there is no way he would tolerate one more day of being incapacitated.

My mom is alive also, and she told him that she'd be with him soon.

Best to you and yours at this difficult time. Your dad will always be with you.

[annabanana]

66. It seems we occupy the same, sad planet right now..

My condolences to you & your family too.

[unpossibles]

63. Sorry to hear it

:hug:


It will get easier, but you will always miss him terribly. Just always remember that he lives on not only in your memories, but also in the values and other things he taught you growing up.

[Bennyboy]

64. Sorry for your loss..

Great story. I am so envious of people that come from tight loving families.Sounds like you had some good strong parents...

[Lost-in-FL]

65. ...

:hug:

[Solly Mack]

67. (((annabanana)))

I'm so sorry, Ann.

[annabanana]

68. Thanks, Solly

It's only been three days, but it feels like both minutes and years ago at the same time. The world if full of booby traps that make my eyes fill as I suddenly remember again what some numbness in my head is trying to make me push away.

[havocmom]

69. Off, down the road, just a bit ahead and round a bend where we can't quiet see them

Yes, advance man. Good way to put it.

He must love your mom very much. And yes, love, present tense. That glorious energy does not vanish just because a vessel wears out. Energy cannot be destroyed. Even Einstein agrees on that point

You have mail, my dear. And loving strength to you as you tend your mother.

hm

[OhioBlue]

70. I'm so sorry anna. my condolences to you and your family

He sounds like such a wonderful man and father. :hug:

[MrMickeysMom]

71. May you be comforted, annabanana...

...He'll always live in your heart, and you'll feel that love when thinking of him.

:hug:

[donheld]

72. So Sorry

:hug:

[friendly_iconoclast]

73. My deepest condolences. Sounds like your dad was a good guy

A real mensch. My thoughts go to you and yours.

[JNelson6563]

74. *sniff*

I've walked this path, I know exactly where you are coming from. :hug:

Julie

[burrfoot]

75. Very sorry. I've been through it and it just plain sucks.

Hang in there.

[JNelson6563]

78. Thank you burrfoot

Kind soul. :hug:

[S n o w b a l l]

76. My sincere condolences,,,,,

It's so very sad and my heart goes out to you and your Mom.

:hug:

[graywarrior]

77. So sorry, annabanana

:hug: