So, I was scolded by a panhandler Saturday night.

[Coventina]

I was riding the light rail, and she came up to me and asked for a dollar or some spare change.

I didn't have any dollars, but I gave her all the change I had, which amounted to 16 cents. I said, "Here, this is all I have."

She called me "super-retarded" and then stomped off to ask the rest of the passengers for money. As she asked each one, she complained about me, yet I was the only one who actually gave her money!

I don't know why I'm telling this story, except that it left me feeling guilty for some reason. But it really was all the change I had! I did have a $20, but that's my grocery money for the week!

[HopeHoops]

1. 25 years ago, we had a laugh in Georgetown over a panhandler.

He was huddled under a blanket up against a building with a cardboard sign that said "I'm hungry." We discussed the idea of buying him a sandwich but didn't do so. On the way back past, we saw him rummaging through a rather expensive looking backpack. That wouldn't have been so bad on its own. What cracked us up was when he spotted us he quickly tucked the backpack under the blanket, whipped out his sign, and returned to his dejected pout pose. What else was there to do but laugh?

[PJPhreak]

32. "a rather expensive looking backpack."

If when I was Homeless if I was judged on the gear that I carried I would have starved!

A short List...

North Face 0 degree Sleeping Bag

Thurmarest Sleeping Pad

MSR Dragonfly ALL FUELS Stove

Mountain Hardware Three man Tent

Clothing with the brand names like UnderArmor,Columbia,Keen and Cardhardt.

Now why would a homeless person have all this "Nice" Gear? (And yes I was accused of stealing this Gear more than once)

Have you ever spent the night out in -15 Weather?

Yup.

Have you ever tried to stay dry in a Texas Thunderstorm?

Yup.

Have you ever tried to get some semblance of a Nourishing meal with $1.27

Yup.

Have you ever had to wear the same clothes for more than 3 or 4 days?

Yup.

Any one here who has any real Wilderness experience would relise that the same Gear That will keep you alive in the Andies or Rockies will also keep you from dying on a Denver street in January!

Edit to add: a good reason to "Hide" expensive gear...To avoid ridicule and theft.

[HopeHoops]

52. Perhaps I didn't make it clear - the backpack wasn't what made us laugh.

It was his haste to HIDE it and the fact that he completely changed his composure to return to his pathetic puppy look when he saw us that made us laugh.

[driver8]

53. There was a guy in DC who used to panhandle in a 3 piece suit.

He usually looked pretty clean and well groomed, and was always talking out of the side of his mouth.

I think he called me a fascist, once.

[Bucky]

2. Don't give panhandlers money. Ever.

Sorry if this sounds harsh, but I worked for two years with the homeless. From experience and first hand accounts of recovering homeless people, I know that about 9 cents of every dime you give them goes down a bottle or up a pipe. Give them food or bus tokens, but never money.

[kentauros]

3. Although I remember giving a dollar or two to a panhandler once

(at the intersection of Fountain View and 59, since you're in Houston) and he thanked me as that was just enough for him to get a hotel room for the night instead of sleeping outside. He promptly gathered up his gear and hiked off, too. Whether he was lying or not, it made me feel that much better about doing that tiny bit of charity :)

(post 9999, by the way)

[Coventina]

7. This is why I do give panhandlers money sometimes.

When I was a very young adult, a man came up to me in a grocery store parking lot asking for bus fare. As he was explaining why he needed bus fare, I was mentally rolling my eyes thinking, "Sure, it's just for drug/alcohol money." But, for whatever reason, I gave him the $2.

Just as I handed it to him, he said, "There's the bus now!" and galloped off and got on! I was so surprised and I felt bad that I hadn't believed him. So, because of that experience, I've been a "soft touch." I admit it, I'm a bleeding heart sucker.

[Iggo]

11. The world needs bleeding hearts, too.

We gotta pick up the slack from them cold-hearted sums-a-biches...lol.

[MiddleFingerMom]

46. True dat!!!

.
Sad, but true.
.
Even sadder that it's SO true.
.

[Captain Hilts]

4. I buy Catwoman outside Union Station coffee. And she is appreciative. nt

[Iggo]

9. Don't help 'em. They breed, you know. (n/t)

[Bucky]

18. Don't be an ass. They need professional help. I've given them rides, referrals, food

They need help, not enabling. Getting handouts of money reinforces their worst habits, which are usually the result of an addiction, which is a disease. Hand them food, you're probably helping them. Hand them cash and the odds are strong that you're making a bad situation worse.

Your mileage may vary, of course, but I'd rather not support someone's self destruction.

[Iggo]

24. delete

:hug:

[PJPhreak]

30. At the Risk of getting yelled at for "Bad language"

Fuck You!!

[Kali]

36. I think that was sarcasm

aimed at the statement to not give money.

[PJPhreak]

38. If that is true...

Then please accept my apologies, The sarcasm thingy helps as I mistook the intent...again my deepest apologies.

P.J.

[Kali]

39. well, it wasn't me

and I could be wrong, but from some of the other responses that poster made I think he/she is empathetic and that one was sarcastic.

[PJPhreak]

43. the sarcasm thingy helps...my mistake,sometimes i have a hard time...

with intent when reading a post...without the person in front of me i screw up at times.

[ironflange]

40. Calm down, everybody

Iggo was merely quoting the distinguished Lieutenant Governor of South Carolina.

[PassingFair]

51. Yup, here's the esteemed LG on video....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpb4nwfiaPY&feature=player_embedded


:puke:

[moriah]

64. And they can live solely on change, right? They somehow... convert it to nourishment?

(See "South Park: Night of the Living Homeless" if you do not get the reference.)

[JonLP24]

14. I know it's just me

I'd still give them whatever change I have. Me refusing won't stop them from drinking or whatever. Plus many do have legitimate needs because I've been there.

[Kali]

47. that is the thing

it is pure arrogance to not realize how close any of us are

it can happen so fast

[Alexander]

15. A lot of panhandlers are professionals. They fake being poor.

There are many stories of panhandlers faking injuries, or living a comfortable lifestyle, or not really being as destitute as they seem.

Not saying this is what most panhandlers do, but it does happen.

Myself, I will only give a panhandler food. Anything else is a big mistake.

[Iggo]

16. And a lot aren't.

:shrug:

[Bucky]

19. Those who are homeless and want to get out of it have resources they can go to.

It's heartbreaking, but having worked with this population for two years I can assure you. About 90% of those who approach you, who make a sign or make and approach and actively panhandle, are addicted to something and they'll feed their jones before they feed their stomachs.

You don't have to take my word for it. Ask a professional.

[Iggo]

23. delete

:hug:

[rcrush]

22. My friend who runs some kind of food donation drive once told me

That a homeless guy went up to him when he was hauling some canned goods and asked him for some money. He said he didnt have any money but he could have some of this food he was hauling. The homeless guy looked at the food and then cussed at him and walked off.

I thought that was hilarious.

[Aristus]

42. Any panhandler sitting outside in the pouring rain in the chill of a January night in Tacoma

is not "faking it." I gave the guy five bucks, and shuddered a little to think how I'd feel if it were me...

[Alexander]

49. I wasn't referring to your specific case.

So I don't quite know why you felt the need to respond to me.

I was simply stating a fact, that many panhandlers make decent money and live somewhat comfortable lifestyles despite appearances.

Those that don't, quite frequently spend the money on drugs, cigarettes or booze.

I gave generously to panhandlers when I was younger, and was somewhat bothered by the fact that these same people would approach me months later with the same excuse, asking for my money. Really? You're still short on rent, 6 months later? Some are just bullshit artists.

What I did notice, though, is that many people will accept food, and I will offer food to panhandlers. It's a pretty good way of determining who is really in need and who is just looking to get money without working for a living.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

17. The one and only time I gave a panhandler money...

...the "excuse me, sir, my car has broken down and I need (fill in amount here) for (fill in need here...gas, a new alternator, whatever)" scam.

He asked for four bucks. I had maybe five on me. I gave him $1. He looked at it, looked at me, gave me a dirty look and stomped away without a word.

Never handed anyone a penny after that. I donate money...just not to individuals who walk up to me on the street.

I've bought food for homeless people a number of times. A couple of weeks ago was the most recent occasion. This man was cold and hungry and when I came back with a meal for him from the Popeye's Chicken a few feet away, he was grateful.

[barb162]

26. A friend of mine who workd with the homeless said the same.

I noticed when I tried offering food to this one "homeless" woman she wouldn't take it. She wanted cash only. I'm not really sure she was homeless as she worked the big train stations and when rush hour was over she left the stations.

[Kali]

27. I figure giving them a choice is more dignified.

[skygazer]

33. So what?

If I give someone money, he is free to do what he likes with it. If what he needs is a beer, or a smoke, or a fix then who the hell am I to judge him? It's hard enough for someone living in a nice house getting three squares a day to kick a bad habit but when you're living on the street, imagine how hard it is!

I hate this sanctimonious attitude of "caring for" people by giving them food rather than allowing them to make their own decisions about what they really want. Either give them the money or don't, but don't patronize them by deciding what they deserve or should have.

[Skittles]

37. I gave a guy sleeping in an alley a small bottle of Crown Royal on Christmas Day

I still remember the look of undisguised admiration I received from him - it was quite priceless

[Hippo_Tron]

58. Quite frankly their life is hard enough, I don't begrudge them a drink

If they are actually addicts and need professional help, my not giving them money isn't going to convince them to get help.

[Captain Hilts]

5. Panhandlers and beggars really go after women for money.

I guess women are more likely to give.

[Bucky]

20. What's interesting is that they tend to not go after teenagers.

I noticed this cause we have a bad panhandling problem in my neighborhood. But my daughter told me they never bothered her. There's some kind of code of honor going on there, I guess, but I've since noticed that they generally go right past the teenagers and approach the young 20 somethings.

[PJPhreak]

31. As an Ex-Panhandler/Homeless...

"Never bother the Children"

Street Ethics.

[Kali]

35. curious

what is your take on the give money/only give food positions?

[PJPhreak]

41. That is a tough one...

there are times both are appropriate. Sometimes the best thing to is to give food,clothing,bedding ect. other times folk are truly in need of something that only cash could help with...Like a motel room on an exceptionally cold evening.
The hard part is to be able to tell the difference.My suggestion,try to spend a moment to talk to the person,find out what their needs may be,it could be as simple as a hot meal in a warm resturant,or a batch of clean laundry...or this person may be in need of a fix or a bottle.
The problem here is how one feels about that persons need at the moment...a Junkie needs his "Meds" that isn't something one can do much about,only the addict can fix that problem.

A Street Trick when it comes to heroin addicts...when they are "Jonesin" they hurt,BAD! I do my best to be nonjudgemental about this but sometimes it is really hard...Anyway,a heroin addict can find temporary relief with a bottle of Ammodium AD,I know that sounds ridiculous,But Ammodiuim AD is an "Non Intoxicant" Opiate based over the counter medication...it chases the monkey away for a short time,giving an addict some relief.

I'm not sayin that getting rid of the "Jones" is what they need,we all know they need to seek treatment...But it is a way to ease their suffring at that moment.

Try to get to know the "Homebums"...The Street people that are not transient but are locals,yes they may be colorful,off the wall,unusual or even scary.for the ladies,bring a BIG male friend with you,learn their names,needs,wants and dreams...sometimes all someone needs is someone to hear them.to listen to them.

They are people too,with the same basic needs as the rest of us!

[Kali]

44. If I am on foot and have time I have no problem sitting and chatting

usually I am in a vehicle so I will hand out whatever I can (I'm not usually in possession of much, but always figure they can use that $5 more than my ass needs junk food)

I am in a very rural situation, so in terms of getting to know the locals I don't really have that "opportunity".

I used to feel like others here who say don't give them money, they will just spend it on whatever is unapproved by the giver. I don't even know exactly where I heard it, (probably here on DU) but the point being who the fuck am I to judge what some other person does? If anybody had justification for getting onto another chemical plane it would be somebody that had to sleep in the cold. (Even if chemicals are what put them there, I'm not going to be able to fix it, that has to come from inside, like you said. If my motivation is charity, to help in a small insignificant way, a few dollars is probably more useful than anything I could buy in the moment instead. Most aren't children so it really isn't my place to be trying to manipulate their "moral" behavior if they aren't hurting anything.

They are people. Sadly, a lot of us try not to think about that.

Thanks for the reply. I do hope you are in a place you want to be.

[PJPhreak]

45. I'm getting there...its a slow process

and thank you for doing what you can...the $5 bucks that you give sometimes makes all the difference in the world!

[Kali]

48. I am glad.

Best thoughts to you. Thanks for contributing, it really helps to have your perspective in the conversation!

[Roon]

6. That is one thing I hate about going downtown

is being shaken down at all the bus stops for spare change. Jason drives me nuts! He gives everyone who asks at least a dollar. He is a suburban boy though,

[david13]

8. Most or all the money goes to drugs and alcohol. Sure they will

use your $2 for a bus ride now, to get to the place where they can get their drugs or alcohol.
Sure they use your money for the shelter, because they already spent theirs on drugs and/or alcohol. Oh, and don't forget cigarettes. They all seem to have money for the tobacco companies, some of your money goes there, as well.
dc

[KamaAina]

29. Usually drugs and certainly alcohol are sold right near wherever homeless people congregate

use your $2 for a bus ride now, to get to the place where they can get their drugs or alcohol.

[Iggo]

10. Don't worry about it.

You gave everything you could at the time.

Every now and then someone isn't as appreciative of our help as we'd like them to be.

That's life.

[Coventina]

12. Well, I wasn't expecting appreciation, exactly. It was only

16 cents after all!

I was just surprised (embarrassed?) that she abused me for actually giving her something, when nobody else did!

Thanks for the kind words.
:-)

[Zomby Woof]

13. Don't be too hard on yourself

At least you didn't act like you wanted to disappear beneath the floor or anything. You actually acknowledged her existence.

[rcrush]

21. I usually dont have a problem with panhandlers unless they approach my car while I'm at a red light

I HATE that. I have no problem giving the homeless guy that hangs out outside of the Walgreens some extra change. But I do not like when people walk up to me when I'm stuck at a red light and knock on my window. I know someone who was carjacked at a red light and it always made me paranoid.

[barb162]

25. I had an discussion with a panhandler

who wanted three bucks after I gave a buck to him. Like how about a simple "thank you."

Was it guilt and anger you were feeling, the fact this jerk was dissing you publicly after giving the jerk what you had.

[guitar man]

28. I remember several years ago

I was hauling gravel to rebuild the end of my driveway after a torrential rain had washed it out. There was a lot of road construction going on and getting a dump truck full of gravel meant getting on a waiting list for 4 or 5 days so I was hauling it from the gravel pit a pickup load at a time and shoveling it by hand.

It was a pretty hot day and I was hauling my 4th load with 4 or 5 loads to go. There were a couple of big guys at the corner a few blocks from my house with a "will work for food" sign. I pulled up and told them "hey, I'll do you one better than that, I'll buy you guys lunch and pay $20 a load to shovel this gravel off, got 4-5 loads left, you could make some decent coin in a short amount of time"

They were not interested in shoveling gravel. I explained to them that It was taking me about an hour a load by myself to shovel it off so between the two of them if they hustled they could make about $20 an hour each for a few hours. Couldn't get them to bite. When I started to drive away, one of them asked if I was going to give them any money? :crazy:

On the next trip by I stopped and handed a $10 bill to a triple amputee in a wheelchair that was panhandling about a half block from them. When I drove back by they were cussing me and flipping me off.

[Ikonoklast]

56. I worked part-time on Sundays at a national retail establishment

located in a large shopping center in a fairly affluent suburb a few years back.

At every Christmas time, we were hurting for help and had the 'help wanted' sign out, with very few takers as all the local kids or housewives in that town didn't want or need need to take a ten dollar an hour job.

Almost everyone that did work at that store lived somewhere else.

Anyway, there was a young fellow that showed up every year around the holidays, shabbily dressed, needing a shave, with a sign that stated he had little kids and a family, and would work for food.

Every year one of the store department heads would walk out to the entrance drive and ask the guy if he wanted a job, as they would put him on immediately, and every year he would tell them to fuck off.

After the holidays, he would disappear.

[UTUSN]

34. Neh, don't feel guilty. I've got one who looks like MANSON. n/t

[proteus_lives]

50. Fuck panhandlers.

They're either fakers or druggies. Neither are worth giving money to.

[Bucky]

54. Ouch. That doesn't sound like "detaching with love" to me.

The problem is the ones that could really use the help aren't the ones who approach you.

[proteus_lives]

55. That's true.

We have a local, long-time homeless man. We call him the Can-Man. He collects cans, doesn't brother anyone and isn't an obvious drunk or druggie. He sits around some local buildings and doesn't beg or hustle anyone. And you know what? People give him money, smokes and food. I do it all the time. He's often by my apt building. Couple times a week I give him some smokes or change.

I think most people are just tired of hustlers getting in their face or personal space.

[PJPhreak]

57. Actually this is how most of the Truly homeless act..

Anyone who gets in yer face is more than likely scammin ya,When I had to "Fly the Cardboard' I would stand wherever I was,quietly,being considerate of those walking or driving by,being a loud,stupid ass benefited no one and usually brought the cops.

i will speak for many homeless folk and say that we also can't stand the scammers...we started "Flyin the cardboard" as a way to find work,if some of ya'll may remember signers first started showing up back in the 80's standing out in front of Home Depot,Sutherlands,Wall-Mart,places where folk may have been buying stuff for remodeling,home repairs,yard work...As soon as some of the scammers saw that we were not only getting some work but a fair amount of donations they jumped all over this...basically ruining it for everybody.

Now how does one find out if that person standing there is being honest...Again I'll speak for myself and some others that I know...I never turned down ANY work offered,in fact I jumped on it...a days work,showing how hard I was willing to work,many times led to two days work,which led to other opportunities.

For a lot of us it was a way to get a foot in the door and up out of the streets.

[Shell Beau]

60. I am guessing most of them are desperate people.

Kinda harsh, don't ya think?

[proteus_lives]

63. Not really.

It's pretty harsh to fake being homeless.

And junkies? No sympathy for them. Personal reasons but my well of sympathy for drug addicts ran-out at about age 15.

[TommyO]

59. I was in Atlantic City a few weeks ago when a woman asked me for money for coffee

I offered to buy her a cup (there was a place to get coffee just a few steps away), she was obviously perturbed and said no. I don't think she wanted the money for coffee.

[CBR]

61. I'll often give panhandlers my spare change and I don't care

if they spend it on a 40. Don't feel bad at all!

[Fire Walk With Me]

62. That'll teach you to handle his pans without asking.

For shame.