BREAKING: President Barack Obama to perform with Page, Plant & Jones @ State of the Union Address

[Amerigo Vespucci]

CNN Washington DC - President Barack Obama, in what is being described as a calculated attempt to reach the masses, will perform "Kashmir," "The Lemon Song," and "Whole Lotta Love" during the grand finale of Wednesday night's State of the Union Address. This marks the first time in United States history that a President of the United States has performed with a legendary British rock band. Former President Bill Clinton made waves performing saxophone on "The Arsenio Hall" show, but President Obama will "trade licks" with famed guitarist Jimmy Page. "He's got it, no doubt about it," remarked Page during secret, closed-door rehearsals held earlier today at the White House.

When asked about the song selection, President Obama told CNN reporters that he will trade lead vocals with Robert Plant, and that the well-known "WOMAN...you NEED it...LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE" will be changed to ""AMERICA...you NEED it...LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE."

"If THAT doesn't get a standing "O," I'm OUTTA there," declared the president.

Dave Grohl, John Paul Jones' bandmate from "Them Crooked Vultures," will sit in on drums.

MORE: SOTU...Whole Lotta Obama