Can someone summarize the plot of the Planet of the Apes movies?

[battleknight24]

When I was really young, I stayed up late one night and saw all 5 Planet of the Apes movies... but I dozed off a bit and don't quite remember... why did the apes rule the world (in part 1)???

[DarkPhenyx]

1. A Chimp was elected President...

and monkies took over the Government. Oh, wait...that was the election of 2000.

[DarkPhenyx]

2. OK serious answer now.

They don't tell you all of why in the first movie, but basically there was an animal plague that whiped out cats and dogs, so we took primates in as pets. They began to get smarter and eventually one said "No." I think, eventually, there was a war and mankind took it in the ass.

[Ready4Change]

11. Yes, partly.

First, humans replaced their (no longer available) cats and dogs with apes. Then, they found apes were useful, could be trained to many tasks. So they started breeding apes to be smarter. About then they stopped being pets and started being slaves. Humans became dependant on apes for all manner of things, to the point that when one ape said "No" and they revolted, there weren't enough humans to stop them. However, the apes also weren't smart enough to maintain human tech, and society disintegrated.

[flakey_foont]

3. and the president of the monkeys was

Ape Lincoln

[DarkPhenyx]

6. *c*

I was thinking Chimpy McCokespoon, but yours is funnier.

[felonious thunk]

4. I hate every ape I see

From chimpan-a to chimpan-zee
No, you'll never make a monkey out of me

Oh my God, I was wrong
It was Earth all along

You've finally made a monkey

Yes, you've finally made a monkey out of me


I love you, Dr. Zaius!

[BigMcLargehuge]

5. ROFLOL!!!!!!!

Get your hands off me you... DIRTY APE!
He can talk!
He can talk!
He can talk!
He can talk!
I CAN SIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!

Best episode ever.

[felonious thunk]

9. Are you gay, Troy?

I wish!

[Viking12]

7. "Damned you dirty apes"

Because Charleton Heston gunned all the people down, then the apes rose up and took the rightful place in the chain of evolution :)

If I remember correctly, there are numerous and sometimes contradictory aspects in the stories on the rise of the apes. Differing details aside: talking apes were transported back in time, spawned a youngster who procreated, and spread language throughout the ape community, which by then had become pet-servants (after the plague wiped out cats and dogs) and who ultimately revolted to break the bondage of indentured servitude, taking over the planet. At some point a nuclear war was involved.

[cprise]

8. An actor is freaked-out by the civil-rights movement

...and makes a series of movies where apes taking over the world serves as a hideous allegory for blacks acquiring political power.

The actor later goes on to head the NRA.

[historian]

10. the original one...

was about some astronauts who landed in a barren desert thinking they were on another planet. The found other humans living in a primitive state, only to find themselves suddenly attacked by armed monkeys on horses who herded them in cells. Heston (may he rot forever) was hurt in the throat so he couldnt talk. One day while being investigated by scientists he suddenly says something. All the monkeys are astounded! A talking human!
The chief monkey wont allow this info out and explains to the scientists that humans are vicious and dangerous - if they are given monkey status (i.e intelligent life) they will destroy everyone.
Last scene - Heston escapes and is seen galloping off on the seashore when he turns a corner and seees half of the statue of liberty buried in sand. He realizes then that he is still on earth, but that there had been an atomic was laying waste to everything. Eventually the monkeys evolved into the superior species (not impossible when one hears bush)

[flakey_foont]

12. or the humans de-evolved

are we not men? We are DEVO