Need advice..

[one_voice]

You guys seems to give good advice, and I have a problem and don't want to over react.

Here's the problem:

New people have moved into the house next door. I have two dogs (boxers), the first weekend after this new family moved in I noticed kids toys in my backyard. I collected the toys and took them to the house, no one was home so I left them on the front patio with a note explaining I'd found them in my yard and asked that the children be careful about toys ending up in my yard. Somethings could be dangerous should the dogs decide they've gotten a new chew toy.

My first thought was the kids that were outside in their backyard were throwing things at my dogs. I have to say at this point, I don't leave my dogs out for hours on end and if they're barking I always check on them to see what they're barking at and tell them to quiet down. I spend a lot time outside with them, so they're well taken care of.

I told my husband what I thought and he agreed that the most logical thing was kids throwing toys at the dogs.

Well this weekend, my dogs were out and started barking, so I went out to see what was going on. As I walked out the back door, sure enough there was a young boy throwing toys and garbage at the dogs. He saw me and continued to throw a doll. I went over picked up what was in my yard handed it to the child and told not to throw things at the dogs (mind you I'm pissed as hell). He said "but they were barking"

There was a young babysitter there, so I couldn't talk to the parents, but did tell her she said she was sorry. I don't know if she told the the parents because they've not said anything to me about it.

I don't want to come off like a bitch, but I've asked once already. And the kid had a coffee can ready to heave at the dogs.

In addition to this problem, they've let their garbage pile up, and not only does it stink, but it's blowing into my yard. Beer cans, tin foil (dogs will eat this cuz it smells like food)they leave the kids out late at night and early in the morning, usually bouncing a basketball right under my bedroom window.

I live in a nice neighborhood, it's pretty quiet for the most part. I've lived here since I was 14 (with my parents) then I went on to buy a house here about 14 years ago. I've never dealt with neighbors like this.

I don't know how to handle this situation. Between the kid throwing things, the garbage problem (they keep their can right up against my fence)I don't want to be the neighbor from hell. We're getting a 6ft privacy fence within the next couple months but who knows what could happen between now and then.

Any suggestion on how to handle this tactfully? I'm still simmering about the toys/stuff being thrown at the dogs.

[OhioChick]

1. Neighbors from hell, huh?

I'd talk to the parents (kindly, of course) about their kids throwing things over the fence at your dogs. Eventually, the kids are either going to throw something over that your dogs are going to try to eat or choke on or try climbing the fence to get a toy they flipped over and might get bitten. (Not saying that your dogs are vicious, an animal can only take so much aggravation/agitation)

As for the garbage, you can always call the city (housing dept. or inspectors) anonymously and they'll make a stop to check it out.

Hang in the until you get that fence put in. :)

[one_voice]

4. Thanks..

You're right, about animals being "pushed" too far. But truth be told, I was more concerned about the dogs choking on something, or something obstructing their intestines. They're really good dogs, but you make a good point about over agitation. I never thought about calling someone about the garbage. We have a really good civic association, maybe I'll start there. The guy that's in charge is great.

Gonna piggy back here, in response to post 2 & 3. I'm going to try and talk to the parents, politely, and tell them my concerns and see if we can work from there. If it seems like they're going to be un-cooperative maybe the fence will have to come sooner. Also good idea on taking pictures.

[Honeycombe8]

9. Yes, talk to the parents. I wouldn't expect much, since they are the reason...

the kids act like they do in the first place. But it shows you're trying to get along, and in case anything happens in the future, they can't say they didn't know. (Kid gets in yard and gets bitten, maybe. Or dog gets hurt and you sue their asses off.)

Like other posters, I'd say to collect the toys and items for awhile, then go over with a box full of the stuff.

I would point out to the parents that you don't leave your dogs out for hours on end without supervision, that you try to monitor their barking, etc. (all the things you said), so you apologize if the dogs' barking irritates the kids, BUT....(you get the idea).

I doubt it's the barking that makes the kids throw things at the dogs. I had this situation many years ago. Our dog wasn't a barker, but the kid next door would climb the wooden fence and throw things over it at our dog. Some kids are just bullies and cruel. We talked to the parent. Dad was aware his kid didn't act right, and he said he continually talked to him. But parents can't know all the time what their kids are up to.

Anyway, the bad neighbor kid got his in the end. Later, my hubby was out front with the dog, who was not on a leash (there was no leash law, and I wasn't around, or he would've been on a leash, anyway). But...bad neighbor kid was playing in his front yard and thereabouts when all of a sudden, bad neighbor kid gets bitten on his hand and is bleeding, while our dog is standing right by him. The bad kid's dad said to his kid "Well, you had that coming!"

I got divorced around that time, so I don't know if bad neighbor kid stopped his bad behavior or not.

[madmom]

2. I would start by keeping all the toys they throw over. This might open up a

chance to talk with the parents when the kid starts to complain about you having their toys. This way you can explain how you got them. Maybe with the garbage just kind of toss it back into their yard?:shrug: I know how you feel about kids and not knowing how to treat or behave around other peoples pets. It tough, good luck!

[Kali]

3. you are obligated to make civil, friendly contact with the parent(s)

to tell them about your concerns at least once. Might even take a couple of face to face conversations. Then if the kids are still doing it I would gather the toys and other thrown objects and keep them for when you call the police. Photos/video are your friends too.

[goldcanyonaz]

5. I can't imagine the parents being any better considering they raised them.

Best of luck to you.

By chance are you in an HOA?

If so you can contact them directly.

Oh, I'd also keep a camera near by to take photos and if it continues I'd call the police.

Oh, and instead of returning the toys just throw them out.

[HopeHoops]

6. Video tape the kids throwing things and keep the toys and trash pictured in the video.

Also, call the local police department and ask what action you could legally threaten them with. It might take a visit from an officer in a marked car to get their attention.

[AngryOldDem]

7. I agree with the advice about keeping the toys.

Once they get chucked over your fence, they're yours, as far as I'm concerned. At least that way it creates an opening for the folks to come over and possibly dialogue with you. But please have no delusions that you'll get anywhere with them. But I would make it clear that if anything would happen to the dogs, they would be liable.

As for the garbage problem, that can be construed as a health hazard, and I would call the local goverment about that. I once did that when a neighbor had a busted flagpole in his yard -- both damned ugly AND a safety hazard -- and the township made him take it down. Also, I have shut down many a late-night party in my day by calling the police.

Bad neighbors just suck. You have my sympathy, and good luck.

[goldcanyonaz]

8. Any updates?

[one_voice]

10. Thanks for asking...

I've kept a look out today for someone to come home, figuring I'd go over and talk to them. But they keep very strange hours, sometimes they're gone for days at a time. I know the husband is in the construction biz, because he told me that when we first met. I'm not sure what his wife does, only that they come and go at weird hours...late at night and such. I think the weekend would be my best shot at talking to them.

Then today, a car parked across the street (from their house) and a guy literally watched the house for around an hour and was on the phone the whole time.

I'm not a nosy person, but I don't work because I'm disabled, so I'm home all day. I'm in and out with the dogs so I can't help but notice things.

I should have known they were a little off, when I first met the husband. I was out with the dogs and he introduced himself, and told me he used to have a dog but the owner of the house (he's renting) wouldn't allow a dog. Then he said "so I sent the dog away", and then said I really don't miss him he had to go.

Also, turns out my husband knows this guy from years ago and the construction biz, that's what my husband does and he says the guy's a real asshole. YIKES!!

I'm going to call a friend, that also knows this guy through construction and see what he has to say about him.

Delaware is such a small state!