Mini-rant: Traffic assholes

[TXlib]

I abolutely fargin' HATE it when people SLOW DOWN in the normal lane to turning speed or slower, THEN move over into the fargin' TURNING LANE that was there all along! And they NEVER think to use their fargin' signal lights!

Can I shoot these fucktards in the head? Pretty please?

[ixion]

1. I hear that, TXlib

stupid drivers are very aggravating. How about those who drive slow in the fast line while gabbing on their cell phone? Those are the ones who really get my dander up.

[TXlib]

6. That's pretty bad, too.

And they remain oblivious of all attempts to alert them to their impropriety.

Makes me want to get an Urban Assault Vehicle -- like an SUV, but with the engine of an 18-wheeler under the hood, and built like a tank, so you can get on the bumper of somebody in front of you and accelerate to insane speeds with them stuck there!

[ixion]

9. ROFL

Funny imagery there. Thanks, I needed that. :hi:

[wysimdnwyg]

33. Isn't that called...

a Hummer?

[Soloflecks]

2. No, and that's why

I don't carry a gun! The temptation to at least shoot out their tires would be too much for me. I have a list of stupid driver stuff a mile long!

[TXlib]

3. I don't carry a gun, either.

And it's for the same reason.

There are some people who are ONLY alive because it's illegal to kill them.

[meegbear]

4. I hear yah ...

I worked for a while in a town (Marblehead) next to the city where I live (Lynn). They all seem to have the reasoning that 'If the speed limit is 30 and driving 30 is safe, then driving 25 makes me safer!' You can tell the people who don't live there because they drive normal.

[TXlib]

8. Hey, I used to live in Franklin MA!

[meegbear]

20. C'mon back!

We miss yah!

[LynneSin]

5. I truly believe Capital Punishment is the only way to teach these folks

And I'm against the death penalty - but I would make exceptions (only if we can include the asswipe who broke into my car a year ago and stole my Led Zeppelin CD's)

[Renew Deal]

10. All they stole were your Led Zepplin CD's?

That's kind of funny. Give 'em the chair.

[LynneSin]

13. No, about half of them

Including half of my Physical Grafitti CD, my BBC recordings, LZ1, 3 and Houses of the Holy and CODA.

:mad:

[TXlib]

11. Sure, I second that!

Preferably execution by slow, excruciating torture.

[Renew Deal]

7. I am guessing you are one of the cowboys carrying guns?

Aren't you allowed to carry in Texas? You could shoot them in the head, but that would probably be an over reaction. You could also fire off a middle finger and some FU's but that's still heavy handed. There is always the laying on the horn option.

[GOPisEvil]

12. The problem with your last two theories...

...if you don't carry (and I don't), the other person MIGHT be. I rarely lay on the horn or give the finger. You never know who's packin' and what kind of mood they're in.

[TXlib]

16. I've learned to flip the bird surreptitiously, under the dash.

It makes me feel better, and carries none of the risks.

Plus, I've come to realise how STUPID people look when they shoot the bird.

Smiling and waving at the offender is far more infuriating to them, and not at all provocative.

[GOPisEvil]

18. Heh...I've done that myself!

:D

[TXlib]

25. What, the Hidden Bird, or waving and smiling?

[GOPisEvil]

28. Hidden bird.

I only break out the smile and wave if someone is mad at me for something I may have done.

[bearfan454]

35. I do carry.

Very rare that I even think about reaching for it. I never have.

[TXlib]

14. Me? A cowboy?

*snarf*

I'm a recent transplant to Texas; by no means a Texan.

I don't carry a gun, mainly because I would be way too tempted to use it.

Flipping the bird, shooting off your mouth, or laying on the horn here in Houston is a great way to get into a very dangerous road-rage incident that would probably end up with gunfire. People here are on a hair-trigger, and full of rage looking for a target.

[Renew Deal]

19. So basically, you want to skip the road rage

and just start shooting? I like the way you think.

[TXlib]

23. Only in my fantasy world, where I am an evil version of "The Punisher"

who goes after cretins guilty of minor, but highly annoying, offenses.

[Bronco69]

15. Here's an idea I've had for a while...

I think the local news in every city should have one minute of airtime devoted to driving tips. Just a quick reminder to people on how to merge, keep up with the flow of traffic, that sort of thing. Maybe then people would be more aware that they're being a**holes, and they would pay more attention.

[TXlib]

17. I think News2Houston started trying to do this.

They had an expose on horrible Houston drivers, tracking them down and confronting them.

I thought they were going to turn it into a weekly bit.

[Renew Deal]

21. Picture of TXLib found in the newspaper

[TXlib]

27. Yup, that's me, in the Bizarro World

where I am asian, and about to unleash some serious kung-fu whoopass on the driver ahead of me.

[pansypoo53219]

22. yes and many more

things piss me off. if there is a boulevard and you have a small car, GET YOUR TAIL OUT OF TRAFFIC. shit, i could fit my early 70's 4 door Olds in a boulevard. YOU ARE DRIVING A CELICA!!!
i have so many peeves.
and the worst drivers tend to have white cars and/or country music station bumpr stickers.

[TXlib]

29. I have a white car; I'm not a bad driver

I've noticed the worst drivers tend to driver the biggest SUVs or pickup trucks that are clearly only used for the commute.

They bought these vehicles either because they knew they were bad drivers, likely to be invonved in accidents, and wanted to make sure they were in the bigger vehicle, or because they wanted to intimidate other drivers.

[DS1]

24. I'm still waiting on delivery of my nuclear-tipped road torpedoes

School buses better be getting out of my damn way!

[GoBlue]

26. Buy a Big Rig Horn

Install under your hood. Give them a big toot as needed.

[TXlib]

30. Heh... leaning on the horn might be more satisfying

if you can see their heart leap out of their throat when you do it!

[xchrom]

31. over population

culling fundies is where i'd start -- and then as my mother used to say ''now you have something to cry about.''

[Padraig18]

32. Can I scatter nails for people who tailgate me on my bicycle?

I don't know :wtf: people think they're doing, but when I'm riding here in town, some idiots INSIST on getting right behind me and then slowing to a crawl; it makes NO difference to these morons if I am right next to the curb (my normal place), wave them on with my left hand, etc., they STILL insist on staying right on my ass!

Go around me, you fucktards! :grr:

[arwalden]

34. Drivers Who Swing WIDE To Make Their Turn...

as though they are driving a SEMI-TRACTOR-TRAILER.