Very mediocre high school football player thinks he's getting a Div. I scholarship

[bluestateguy]

What would you do in this situation? My parents live next door to this other family whose son plays high school football (Sr. year season is coming up). He is a very mediocre player. He's a competent player, good enough to play for his school's crummy team in their lowly ranked league in the state.

Yet this delusional 17 year old seems to be convinced that he is headed off to a full ride at some place like UT, LSU or Alabama. Neither he, nor anybody else on his team, is in that category of ability that would make him a scholarship candidate for a place like that.

Pretty soon he's going to start wondering why the scouts are ignoring him and the scholarship offers are not rolling in. This kid's parents don't seem to have the heart to tell him that just because he's competent enough to suit up for a high school team that no, it does not mean you will get a scholarship offer, and certainly not at a marquee school like the ones listed above. From what I have been told about him, I'm not even sure he would get an offer at a Div. II or III school. I don't think this will end well for him.

[RandomThoughts]

1. The problem there is he lets someone 'offer' something.

That is why that fails, it puts the decision elsewhere. He should decide what will happen, then let the pieces fall in place to make it happen by combination of free will decisions.

Its all in the sequencing and ordering. The motivation exist, it just has to be in a form of a resonance wave to create a large enough effect, timing mostly.


An example, if you wanted to build a house, you don't have to get anyone to decide to build a house, only to decide to drive individual nails into the framework, compartmentalized but in the right sequence and timed to have the materials and nails in the right places.


That is how people been making money and how they sunk the stock market, and many other scams, and why they don't know what is going on when they do it, because they follow a bait desire to just drive a nail, without knowing what they build.

[Chan790]

2. There is certainly something to be said for the "will to succeed"

I was recruited for a D-II college football team and I never started a game. When they came around and asked my coach and the other coaches in the league who they should be looking at "Well that Chan kid over at the catholic school is all heart and he's got an engine that doesn't stop whistle to whistle. He never gives up, pulls up or half-asses anything." That was all the recruiter needed to hear. I had no talent whatsoever.

There comes a point where drive outpaces talent. After an interception, I once saw a 255lbs. FB chase down a CB who went on to be a D-I sprinter at Utah because one let up 20 yards from the goal-line and the other pasted him full-steam. Further, there is little doubt who was the more talented QB coming out of college between lazy golden-boy Ryan Leaf and hearty-workhorse Matt Hasselbeck but the less-talented guy is an NFL starter and the more talented guy got cut a decade ago for not caring if he played well or not.

Of course, I decided to not take the scholarship for football because I was entering the seminary but that's a different story.

[RandomThoughts]

4. If I have any talent, I hold it in reserve sometimes and use it when most needed.

I think it should be used for better actions, so many times when thinking on story ideas don't think about stuff like that, but always try to keep some thought on what needs to be done.

although I don't know if I do have talent, there is much talent that is used by many people in many places, and really think doing nothing is a talent in itself, and try to use that talent as often as I can to the best effects.

There is a note about not trying, many times things try to position what you try at. Like for a joke, or to distract, some things want me to attack Glenn Beck, when he is basically a parody of many things I do. Trying to set a counter to my thoughts, by creating a cardboard cut out that is opposite to act as a tank.

Basically I could have false fun by imaginary conflicts instead of staying on main goals. Having that fun would be wasting effort, and make doing nothing, doing nothing in vain. I think doing nothing should be done with all effort and talent possible, but also with good focus and intent. Since if something is done that is a distraction, nothing gets accomplished.

Same thing happens in media, where people pop up trying to pull you off of focus, during down time, you can muse on some things to find thoughts, but engaging distractions should only be done to continue main ideas of more useful conversations and correcting systems that need to be corrected.


So not sure if it is talent or "will to succeed" since not sure what either might be anyways.

[XemaSab]

8. When I was in high school I had a pretty good voice

There were certain sectors pressuring me to apply to the San Francisco Conservatory of Music to go into an opera career.

I have no idea if I was actually good enough or not, but I didn't really want to be an opera singer. I didn't think I would be good at memorizing massive operas, and I have a love/hate relationship with the stage.

I decided to leave it someone who wanted it more, and I have never regretted my choice.

[petronius]

3. I would do nothing. There is a 0% chance that anything you (or your parents) say

will disillusion this kid, but a 100% chance that it would cause a rift with the neighbors. Lend a sympathetic ear when they finally catch on, and on the very slim chance he succeeds you can say " Yeah, I know that dude..."

[hippywife]

11. Exactly what I would do.

That is the best advice one could give in this situation. Wish him luck without being supportive of his delusion, and then if he cares about the kid, be there to listen and console when the thing falls apart.

[madinmaryland]

23. +1000. Why piss someone off, by commenting on their children.

[bluestateguy]

24. I was never really planning on saying anything

Unless of course, I am asked. But I do have the right to have an opinion.

[madinmaryland]

28. Ok. Just be careful, though. The person you are talking to could be

a member of the gungeon here.

:scared:

[tourivers83]

32. I wish it was not like this in the world.

As a new member of the gungeon I would just like to say that we are not bad people we are just defending what was for a long while a socially untouchable position for Democrats. The right to defend oneself, ones loved ones and one’s home with a firearm and as a gay woman in an area dominated by men I can understand some trepidation but the world is changing. And when things go bump in the night it is reassuring to have my girl beside me. My dogs all over the bed, and a loaded revolver on the bedside table. :pals:

[realisticphish]

5. The brutal reality is

there are thousands and thousands of football players who graduate from high school each year.

There are not thousands and thousands of open roster spots for collegiate ball, even down to Division III


My high school had a star running back; set league records, was a good student, etc. He played two years at a community college until he got his associates degree. And that's reality for a lot of high school players, even excellent ones.

[bluestateguy]

6. Same here

My high school had a star running back too, but the team sucked, and our league was small potatoes in the state.

He was ignored by recruiters and could do no better than a couple of unspectacular years playing for the local community college.

[realisticphish]

7. and the thing with our guy was

he was HAPPY. He loved it. He got to play football, got an education, and went about his life (sadly, he died a few years ago, killed in a construction accident).

But a lot of players are not happy with that, and assume that they will be starting for Texas their first season.

[pokerfan]

9. Reminds me of this story from a couple of years ago

Prep player from Nevada told everyone all year long that he was being heavily recruited and even called a press conference to announce that he would be attending Cal over Oregon. Only problem, none of it was true.

A week ago, in front of television cameras and a packed high school gymnasium, the 6-5, 290-pound offensive guard placed two baseball caps on a table -- a Cal Bears cap on his right, an Oregon Ducks cap on his left -- and then, after a dramatic pause, put the blue-and-gold Cal hat on his head.

"They really won me over," Hart told reporters. "Coach Tedford and I talked a lot, and the fact that the head coach did most of the recruiting of me kind of gave me the real personal experience."

Actually, the Cal head coach barely knew he existed. That's because there was no scholarship offer. Not from Cal. Not from Oregon. Not from anywhere. Hart made it up. He made everything up.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/columns/story?columnist=wojciechowski_gene&id=3236039

[bluestateguy]

10. That's quite a story

Did this meathead (and he even looks stupid) think that his story would not fall apart right after his fake press conference?

As for this other case in the OP, I don't think this kid is dishonest. Delusional and naive, but not dishonest.

[pokerfan]

13. I doubt he was thinking at all

It's like something George Costanza (Seinfeld) would have done. Maybe he thought he could just show up at UCBerkeley and just start playing.

ESPN Outside the Lines: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2SU7v9nxfs

[alphafemale]

12. I went to HS in a mediocre school where a guy was heavily recruited

But then this was a kid who won the "kick" division of the national Punt /Pass & Kick competition when he was around 11.

I was in grade school with him too and witnessed his entry level kick. It was probably twice as far as anyone else had done.

I still remember the looks on the faces of the "spotters."

In HS he routinely made 45 yd field-goals.

He turned down numerous scholarships because.....?

c'mon guess.

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His girlfriend didn't want him to move away.

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And yes. They broke up about 6 months after HS.

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There were people who said she "ruined" his life.


Or maybe he just didn't really want to play football as much as other people wanted him to play football. I went to school with him since K-Garten.

That'd be my guess.

Ability and desire aren't always given to the same person.

Desire without ability is what many people have.

"I'm going to be an ASTRONAUT!"

"No kid. Probably NOT"

We get over it.

Ability without desire is somewhat worse, I'd imagine.

All around you, people would be trying to funnel you into a life you didn't want.

[Chan790]

22. "Ability without desire is somewhat worse."

That's exactly it too. I am an exceptional writer, not merely good but publishable serious literature. I wrote a children's book when I was 8. I've won every writing competition I've ever entered. I won a major regional writing prize sophomore year of college typically won by graduate-level English majors.

And I'd rather rip out my toenails than write anything longer than 4 pages. My entire adult life I've heard it too. Friends, family, professors. "You're a waste, if I had your talent I'd use it. Such a shame." My own parents grief me that I won't just write some piece of mass-market trash to sell lots of copies and make millions of dollars so I can buy them a big f*cking house.

My passions are arts-development (like fundraising) and photography. I read voraciously, as well; honestly I'd make a great editor or spec. reader but even there I constantly hear it for not wanting to actually write. They're the worst because they don't understand how someone could love other people's words and not want a voice of their own.

So...I work in a bank. It's low-stress, moderate pay. I get to work 9-5 and go home.

[jobycom]

14. Watch "Rudi."

The dream will get him through high school, maybe encourage him to go to college, maybe work his way up from JC. Maybe he'll find what he loves in college. Maybe it will even revolve around his football dreams--sports therapy, sports medicine, PE coach. Who knows?

Never kill a kid's dream. Never kill anyone's dream. They die on their own easily enough. Pursuing a dream is how you learn to live.

[bluestateguy]

15. Well, we will see

He's going to have to have a hell of a season this Fall to get any scouts to pay attention to him.

I'll bookmark this thread and report back to everyone in the Winter for an update.

[alphafemale]

16. Encouraging someone to have a "Plan B" isn't exactly being a dream-killer

You could even phrase it in terms of "what if you slipped on a grape and blew out your knee?"

Help him look for "what if" grants and things.

[gmoney]

26. Rudi?

Or Rudy?

[jobycom]

31. As Andrew Jackson once said

It's a simple mind that can't think of at least two ways to spell a word. :rofl:

[smalll]

17. Talk to them. Also, chew them out for not recycling. After all, it's "single stream" now --

got to keep ahead of those Yalies!

A lot more Americans need to step up to their neighbors and call them on their self-delusion and/or shit! It would be appreciated! :eyes:

Tell the parents their son is a loser; I'm sure they'd love to hear it!

[WinkyDink]

18. What would I, a non-neighbor as yourself, "do"? NOTHING, that's what. Not my business.

[proteus_lives]

19. Nothing. Let him go through this.

It's not your place to say anything.

[dembotoz]

20. ah yes--to have your hopes and dreams crushed at 17

gee kind of like being married for all too many of us isn't it.


We don't really celebrate any others paths to success out side of athletics do we.

[LisaL]

21. Since he is not your kid, why is it even your business whether he gets

the scholarship or not?

[pitohui]

25. what would i do? seriously? this is like drying dishes

honey you don't have to do a thing life will do it for you, put the dishes in the tray and sooner or later they'll dry themselves

he will find out abt life from life, he's 17

ask yourself, what benefit could come from you sticking in your two cents here?

[Dappleganger]

27. It's sad, but there's nothing for you to do.

It's not your story but someone else's.

[RandomThoughts]

29. Thats what people don't understand.

It is everyone's story.


People think that because someone says something it means what they think it means.

A story means what a listener can learn from it, what they think it means, and how it effects them.

If a story belongs to the teller, then you are programmed to believe their perspective. If you learn what you choose from a story, then you are free to think and feel as you want.

[quakerboy]

30. my 21 year old cousin still

plans to grow up to be a princess and a singer/popstar. What should I do about it?