Excessive hugging

[alarimer]

Does anyone know people who must hug you every time you meet, even if you last saw them the day before?

I know someone who does this to me and it drives me nuts. So much so that I look for excuses not to be around her. I am not a touch-feely person and feel like it is a violation of my personal space.

I am not sure what I should do.

[TroglodyteScholar]

1. I can't relate.

Love hugs.

Why do you suppose it makes you feel violated? Do you have a problem with her beyond the hugging?

[REP]

2. Some of us are naturally just more reserved and value our privacy

I do not like this social hugging as well. If I havent seen you for a year and we are close, then it's appropriate; but if we're casual acquaintances or just met, it's inappropriate. It's about respect and not faking connections that don't exist.

[TroglodyteScholar]

4. Interesting.

Not arguing with you, just offering my perspective. Hugs to me are just like a handshake but warmer. They only really bother me if the person I'm hugging doesn't practice good personal hygiene. Otherwise, no worries.

[Bucky]

5. Well, there's your answer, Alarimer. The perfect solution.

They only really bother me if the person I'm hugging doesn't practice good personal hygiene.

Not only will this get rid of your problem hugger, you'll actually end up saving money on shampoo!

[alarimer]

12. Win-win LOL n/t

[alarimer]

11. I am just more reserved than most.

Certainly if I haven't seen a friend or relative in a while (say months or years) than I am okay with it.

Otherwise, not so much.

[RandomThoughts]

3. I think someone needs a hug... LOL

:hug: :)

I know what you mean though, part of being a D emo'crat probably. :)

[alarimer]

Probably LOL.

As an occasional thing, it wouldn't be that big a deal.

[alarimer]

13. Probably LOL.

As an occasional thing, it wouldn't be that big a deal.

[Brickbat]

6. I know exactly what you're talking about and I totally agree.

Unfortunately, the only way to get the message across in something like this is to say it straight out.

[tinymontgomery]

7. I'm the same way

unless it's a relative or my wife stay away, I don't know you that well. My HS students try to hug me, no way. Quick way to get in trouble when they get pissed at you. Don't shake hands with them either, have seen to many teachers get spoken to because it was taken the wrong way. I do tell them up front that I don't do either. I can be friendly in other ways with out touching.

[Lil Missy]

8. tell her, "nothing personal but I don't care for hugs."

I've had to set that boundary with someone I know. She persisted with touching me in other ways so I held out my hand to keep her away. She finally got the message. Frankly it pissed me off that she had so little regard for my feelings.

[Bunny]

9. I'm not crazy about all that touchy-feely stuff either, especially from people that I am not close

to. With good friends that I haven't seen in a while, hello and goodbye hugs are fine. Otherwise, I don't like having that boundary crossed.

[Name removed]

16. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[MiddleFingerMom]

10. I don't understand WHAT the hell your problem is...

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... I don't know ENOUGH people who must hump me every time we
meet, even if I last saw them the day before.
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I know someone who does this to me and it drives my nuts. So much
so that I look for excuses to be in front of her.
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SHEESH!!!! Excessive humping is only when your furniture starts to show
a lot of wear-and-tear.
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What d'ya say? ... ... ... GROUP HUMP? ... ... ... :grouphug:
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[rug]

14. Churl.

[Common Sense Party]

15. Try this therapy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hN8CKwdosjE

[alarimer]

17. Is that like aversion therapy?

The last thing I want is some stranger's grubby hands on me.

[InvisibleTouch]

18. I hate this too.

I'm not a big huggy-touchy-feely type either, I like my personal space. My family-of-birth was Catholic, and there was a time when my mom was big on trying to drag us to church. The part of the service that I absolutely hated the most, was when you're supposed to look around and shake hands with everyone near you. Ugh. And that's just a handshake. If I'm deliberately choosing to be intimate with someone, the sensation of touch is welcome - but random hugs are absolutely not my thing. You are not alone there.

[applegrove]

19. Hug o' War by Shel Silverstein

http://www.google.ca/#hl=en&source=hp&biw=&bih=&q=hug-o-war&btnG=Google+Search&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&oq=hug-o-war&gs_rfai=&fp=e9775993b0ba1392

[applegrove]

20. I hug or don't hug depending on how I am feeling. I usually hug someone I haven't seen in a while

if they are a pal. The reason why is because I was so reserved as a teen that those feelings still come back to me.