How to Stuff Your Parrot on Thanksgiving

[Kat45]

I love this one! Just have to share it every year.


Ingredients:

Turkey
Stuffing
Sweet Potatoes
Mashed Potatoes with Gravy
Green Beans
Cranberry Sauce
Hot rolls and Butter
Relish tray
Pumpkin Pie with Whipped Cream
Hot Coffee


Instructions:

Get up early in the morning and have a cup of coffee. It's going to be a long day, so place your parrot on a perch nearby to keep you company while you prepare the meal.

Remove parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.

Prepare stuffing, and remove parrot from edge of stuffing bowl and return him to perch.

Stuff turkey and place it in the roasting pan, and remove parrot from edge of pan and return him to perch. Have another cup of coffee to steady your nerves. Remove parrot's head from turkey cavity and return him to perch, and re-stuff the turkey.

Prepare relish tray, and remember to make twice as much so that you'll have a regular size serving after the parrot has eaten his fill. Remove parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.

Prepare cranberry sauce, discard berries accidentally flung to the floor by parrot. Peel potatoes, remove parrot from edge of potato bowl and return him to perch.

Arrange sweet potatoes in a pan and cover with brown sugar and mini marshmallows. Remove parrot from edge of pan and return him to perch. Replace missing marshmallows.

Brew another pot of coffee. While it is brewing, clean up the torn coffee filter. Pry coffee bean from parrot beak. Have another cup of coffee & remove parrot from kitchen counter and return him to perch.


When time to serve the meal:

Place roasted turkey on a large platter, and cover beak marks with strategically placed sprigs of parsley.

Put mashed potatoes into serving bowl, re-whip at last minute to conceal beak
marks and claw prints.

Place pan of sweet potatoes on sideboard, forget presentation as there's no
way to hide the areas of missing marshmallows.

Put rolls in decorative basket, remove parrot from side of basket and return
him to perch.

Remove beaked rolls, serve what's left. Set butter out on the counter to soften -- think better of this strategy and return it to the refrigerator.

Wipe down counter to remove mashed potato claw tracks. Remove parrot from
kitchen counter and return him to perch.

Cut the pie into serving slices. Wipe whipped cream off parrot's beak and place large dollops of remaining whipped cream on pie slices.

Whole slices are then served to guests, beaked-out portions should be reserved for hostess.

Place parrot inside cage and lock the door.

Sit down to a nice relaxing dinner with your family -- accompanied by plaintive cries of "WANT DINNER!" from the other room.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

[kentauros]

1. Hahaha! That's hilarious!

I've never owned a bird, but I can just imagine :rofl:

It reminded me of the Brooklyn-dinner scene in the movie "My Favorite Year" when the origin of the evening's meat was revealed :evilgrin:

[Kat45]

3. Yup, that's life with a bird!

I can definitely picture the beaked rolls. :rofl:

[MiddleFingerMom]

2. I bet Kali wrote that about Watson!!!! n/t

[Kat45]

4. I assume Watson is a bird? n/t

[mopinko]

5. a macaw, i think.

[Kat45]

7. That's a big bird.

Can do a lot of damage. Even my little one can do some damage, but nothing like a macaw.

[mopinko]

8. too big for me. same with toos.

really too big to be pets. macaws are great chewers, too. you have to give them enough to chew if you want to keep your furniture.

my grey and my lori get me in more than enough trouble.

[MiddleFingerMom]

6. According to Kali, Watson is a demon incarnate as a macaw...

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...but she's all talk -- you can tell she loves him.
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Is she a devil-worshipper?
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[xchrom]

9. that's funny.

a boyfriend of mine had a little parrot that was always into everything you did in the kitchen -- everything.

if you got out the bread -- he was there -- if you got out the cheese -- yep.

he didn't like the stove -- good for him -- but he liked anything that came out of it.

[redwitch]

10. An old friend had a girfriend with a parrot.

One night they were making love and the parrot fell off the curtain rod where it was sleeping, onto the bed. Major traumatized friend. He and girlfriend broke up shortly thereafter.

[realisticphish]

11. haha

never owned a bird, but I worked with them at a pet store, and this is 100% true...

[hunter]

12. Parrots are demons.

We have an African Grey.

People wonder "Well, why don't you just lock her up?"

... until they hear her screaming.

If hell has a soundtrack, she knows it.

[hedgehog]

13. We have a very , very old cat who could sub for your parrot.

Not to mention the dogs hanging around just in case something hits the floor.

[Kat45]

14. A Happy Thanksgiving kick for the holiday. n/t

[lovemydog]

15. happy thanksgiving

I enjoy reading all the bird stories.

[Kali]

16. oh yes, this sounds too familiar

here Watson "helps" make salsa (note the decorative work on my paper towels too)

[Kat45]

19. Ah! So this is the infamous Watson mentioned earlier in the thread.

He's beautiful! A blue & gold? How old is he?

[Kali]

21. infamous is a good word

he is 21 or so - my sister and her ex hand-raised him and she thinks he was a baby about the same time as my youngest's birth, so we just say they are the same age, although there doesn't seem to be any real records. He came to live with us 12 or 15 years ago??? I can't remember that either.

[nolabear]

17. Yep, we have to keep our African Grey caged when we're cooking.

Pidge (because she's grey like a pigeon) gets really happy when I'm in the kitchen, and kicks up a fuss, whistling, talking and meowing (I feed her and the cat at the same time in the morning so she figures if you meow you get fed) and generally throwing a fit. If she wasn't confined that would be exactly the scenario! Fortunately, she can eat most of the veggies and a little dressing (as long as there are no onions). Makes for one happy bird and a pretty entertaining morning.

[Demoiselle]

18. I watched a wonderful nature special about parrots years ago..

It spoke of how sociable they are, how their hearts and minds can be broken by isolation and loneliness. The final scene showed a pet parrot tippytoeing across the bedroom floor and slipping underneath the covers at the foot of the bed. Then we see a lump moving up the bed until finally, the parrot pops out from beneath the covers and settles down to sleep on the pillow next to his mistress's face. Maybe the sweetest thing I've ever seen. I might forgive beaked rolls for such sweetness.

[Kat45]

20. Awww! That's so cute!

Parrots are great! Each bird has his or her own personality and quirks. And yes, I believe they have emotions as well. I just love them!

[kimi]

22. I've seriously considered getting a bird

African Grey or another cockatiel. I love their personalities. And they're such characters, and the stories are great, I enjoy them also. But now I have 6 cats and am moving within 6 months, so I'm holding off.

So keep the bird stories coming, please!

[Digit]

23. One of my parrots favorite videos to watch

Ah yes, life with a parrot for sure! When I give my girl spaghetti, I sing "Uh Oh, spaghetti toes".

Anyhoo...
My parrot used to say, "You going on the computer?", but she recently changed it to, "Peek-A-Boo computer?"

Here is a link to one of her favorite videos to watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iB52iP2a_MY

It is an Indian Ringneck named Marnie that loves her new stuffed bunny.

I hope you enjoy!

[Kat45]

24. Thanks you for posting the video

It's so cute. Ringnecks are beautiful birds. What kind of parrot do you have? She sound so cute.

[Digit]

25. I have an African Grey

Right now she is making the sound of the phone ringing in the hopes I will come upstairs to answer it.

Whatever she can do to lure me upstairs....

She really is a hoot.

[Kat45]

26. Yup, sounds like a bird! They have to be the center of attention.

Every minute of the day. That's so cool that you have a grey. All birds are smart, but I'd say greys are the smartest of all, and probably the best talkers. Alex showed just how intelligent they are. Does yours have a big vocabulary? What's her name?