Serenity Now!!!!

[scottcsmith]

My wife just got home from school (we're on the "left" coast...ha ha ha ha ha, and she's attending a grad program where they meet once a week for four hours) and we turned on the tube to Hannity and Colmes (the late-night replay) and there's Hannity talking to Al "line of succession" Haig about Condi Rice appearing before the 9/11 commission, and after about eight seconds they started talking about John Kerry and I was screaming at the TV, "FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, WHAT THE FUCK DOES JOHN KERRY HAVE TO DO WITH THE 9/11 COMMISSION?" and my head explodes from my neck. After re-attaching my head I hoped the conversation would return back to THE FUCKING TOPIC but no, Haig is rambling on about John Kerry and Watergate and Hannity is babbling about Kerry and I'm thinking "PLEASE, GOD, PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY!" and I begin to hallucinate, as Hannity brings on guest after guest: Oliver North, Ann Coulter, Laura Ingraham, Michelle Malkin, Newt Gingrich, Michael Reagan, Rush Limbaugh, David Limbaugh, Pat Buchanan, Bay Buchanan, Mansoor Ijaz, the entire team from Fox and Friends, the ghost of Richard Nixon, the ghost of Gerald Ford (who is not dead, but still), Shep. Smith, Tony Snow, and, for balance, Gerry Ferraro, and everyone is talking at the same time and Hannity keeps saying "ON A SILVER PLATTER" over and over and over and the Limbaugh brothers are arguing over whether or not John Kerry is related to Jane Fonda and Alan is trying to steer the conversation back to the 9/11 commission but in doing so is forcibly ejected from the studio by an axe-wielding Bill O'Reilly and before long everyone gets up, starts country line dancing and chanting "CLINTON, CLINTON, CLINTON" while Bill O'Reilly is swinging his axe and yelling "IT WAS A POLK!!!" and then I get checked into a mental hospital.

[coloradodem2005]

1. Serenity Now. Insanity Later.

Just thought I would warn you.

[mdmc]

2. he is watching that trash. insanity now!

:kick:

[theoceansnerves]

7. i heard lloyd braun

can get you a good deal on imported gum.

[Bunny]

3. ****snarf***

That was a good one!! Enjoy your stay in the mental hospital. Sometimes it seems like a vacation, doesn't it?

:)

[laura888]

4. brain-washing Amerikans

I'm afraid that giving $ to the DNC and other democratic causes is useless when these types of shows are spewing this kind of filth. Surely there is some brain-washing action going on?

[Nostradammit]

5. Brilliant !!!

Just about choked on my corndog when I got to the "IT WAS A POLK" part!


That's exactly the way it is, scottcsmith.

[VOX]

6. Tell it, brother scott!

Way to riff, guy! The weird thing is that this is kind of closer to reality than is comfortable.

Well done -- :toast:

[Bertha Venation]

8. I nominate this for the best damn post in a very long time -- and

I think DU should put it up on the front page. How about it, Mods -- point this out to Skinner & suggest a "tidbits from the forum" link box on the front page. This is beautiful and every DUer should read it. It gave me a great start to the morning.

Thanks, Scott!

[scottcsmith]

9. I'm blushing

Ah, thanks everyone. Now my narcissism is complete.

[Droopy]

10. Kick

Excellente, Senior Scott.