Because I want you all to know

[Tobin S.]

This is a shout out to auntAgonist and her husband, but I'm posting it here on the board because I want you all to know what good people they are.

I went up to Michigan yesterday with my wife to meet up with auntAgonist and her husband as well as another friend of theirs. Jen and I had a wonderful time. aA and D made us feel right at home. I truly felt the same way there as I would in my own living room which made it so easy to just be myself. They are very warm and kind people. We talked about all sorts of things and ate some great food. I look forward to meeting them again.

I was just wandering around the internet this evening and coincidentally ran across a post on another message board about the fear of judgment from people in general. The blogger talked about being comfortable with yourself and being who you truly are at all times when in the presence of strangers as well as your loved ones. A lot of times I worry about being judged when I'm outside of the comfort zone of family and friends. This can be stifling. So from now on I'm going to keep this stuff in mind and try to build confidence in myself as well as in those who are close to me.

Here is what I wrote in response to the poster on the other message board:

"I struggle with fearing judgement at times. It's easy for me to be who I truly am with my wife and other loved ones and friends. I just wish that I could transfer that feeling of confidence and security to all the other aspects of my life and in particular my job.

I think a lot of people suffer in this way. When I was a child and would sleep over at friends' homes, I would often see the "rest of them." That part that they were not confident enough to show the rest of the world, but they could to their family. That is, where they truly felt comfortable.

It seems to me that a lot of people lose so much of themselves in our everyday wanderings through life. Through the business of living. Very few unveil their true selves beyond where they feel comfortable, and, as a result, we lose contact with a lot of people who might enrich our lives. We lose a part of our humanity and, like was mentioned above, fail to see the divine- in others as well as in ourselves.

Thank you,

Tobin"

Communication is what it's all about. Be strong and say what's in your heart. Peace.

[trof]

1. I've met a half dozen DUers in person.

Never had a bad experience.
:-)

[Tobin S.]

2. Excellent!

:thumbsup:

I've met several of them as well and I can report the same thing.

[freshwest]

3. Very good observation there. Thanks for bringing it here.

:hi:

[auntAgonist]

4. Tobin, as with other times we've gotten together we have

always enjoyed your company. This time was especially good in that you brought your lovely new bride with you!

We had a wonderful time and were only sorry that you couldn't stay longer!

Thank you for the kind words.

:loveya:

aA
kesha

[MiddleFingerMom]

5. Back when I had my radio show, we (as "programmers" -- the title preferred to "DJ's" at the time)..

.
.
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... also produced our own shows, running the sound board and
answering our own phones between talk sets.
.
ALMOST 100% of the programmers were very nice, laid-back, real
folks (our station slogan, if I recall right... was "Real People, Real
Radio"). Most used their REAL names, did NOT use phony "DJ"
voices, and were NOT ego-driven (a few were).
.
.
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Everybody... EVERYBODY got the occasionally nasty call. "YOU
SUCK!!!" (SLAM!!!) .
.
.
.
Except for me. In years of a weekly show, I never got one single
solitary "nasty" call. All nice ones.
.
It was something I didn't dare TELL anyone while it was going on --
there are too many folks (we see them here on DU sometimes)
whose ONLY contribution they seem to feel capable of making is
as a "spoiler" -- someone who is uber- and ever-negative. I
knew if I "confessed" to never having a bad call, someone would
call me just to disrupt that odd and wonderful "streak".
.
.
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But I talked to my listeners as friends... and they talked back to
me as the same thing. It was just one of the things I loved about
that experience.
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BTW, the closest thing I had to a bad call was from a Vietnam
vet who called me very drunk and very angry because I was
playing Tom Paxton's "Talkin' VietNam Pot-Luck Blues" (linked
below -- it's a FUN song!!!). We talked for a little while and
found we had more in common than he thought. He finally told
me the reason he was so mad had nothing to do with me -- his
son had left to drive 90 mins to the airport and he was drunk.
My caller was worried sick about him.
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It turned out to be a GREAT call. Just before he hung up, he
shouted, "WE LOVE YOU, BROTHER!!!"
.
How nice is THAT?!?!?
.
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Unfortunately, not always... but the vast majority of the time
you're gonna reap what you sow.
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And from what we know about you, Tobin... the vast majority
of people YOU encounter are going to BE warm and kind. Duh.
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It's nice to see it in your writings, though.
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[Tobin S.]

6. Thank you very much, MFM

That's very kind. :hug:

[MiddleFingerMom]

7. I forgot to link to "Talkin' Vietnam Pot-Luck Blues".

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pU7NEOBnMVI
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"What's the matter with YOU... ... ... ... baby?"
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