That's right! Now that the world's most volatile and dangerous dictator, and clearly-proven conspirator of the attacks of September 11th has been caught, we may as well cancel the 2004 elections now! Our brave, fearless and ingenious leader has once again shown his clout and prowess by leading our military to a swift and bloodless victory! Meanwhile, Howard Dean and his butt-buddy Al "Qaida" Gore are left with their pants down, caught in their lies and pointless attacks on a true American hero. We should do the right thing now and just spare the Demoncrats the embarassment of losing every single state in the 2004 election. As if there was any question before, what with Bush's spotless track record of success and heroism as our fearless leader DESPITE the constant politics-playing of the various Demoncrat infidels that so often violate the ultimate power that our country has given to the executive branch. You all need a wake-up call to even hold on to your clueless ideals, backed up with facts that are so far from "fair and balanced" that they make me laugh. I DARE you communist fools to bring forth something that can even come close to rivaling Anne Coulter's brilliant "Treason," with its superfluity of SOLID PROOF and end notes to combat the naysayers. Bush has always been in the right, and you commies can never find a way to even pull off a good insult. By 2005, I'm hoping we can finally end this partisan bickering and unite under the banner of the Republican States of America and fix our ailing political system. Ascendancy is necessary: that of the pure, just and righteous Bush family line, or any such families that are dictated as being worthy of such a tremendous role of power by the inner circle. Perhaps we can see the American success story known as Arnold Schwarzengger ascend the throne one day, but I admit, I can only dream sometimes. Either way, grab your ankles, commies! My party will triumph for the next 5 to 9 years.. at least!
** THE PRECEDING TEXT REPRESENTS A TASTE OF WHAT WE'RE LIKELY TO HEAR IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS. ITS CONTENT SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY UNLESS THE READER IS A TRUE, UNSWERVINGLY LOYAL PATRIOT THAT UNQUESTIONINGLY FOLLOWS OUR JUST, FEARLESS AND INFALLIBLE CHIEF OF STATE **
God Bless America