Clocks in Heaven

[Renew Deal]

A man died and went to heaven.
As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.
He asked "What are all those clocks"?
St. Peter answered,
"Those are Lie Clocks. Everyone on earth has a lie clock. Every time you lie the hands on the clock will move".
"Oh" says the man. "Whose clock is that"?
St. Peter says "That is George Washington's. The hands have never moved, indicating that he has never told a lie"
"Incredible" says the man. "And whose clock is that one"?
St. Peter responded, "That is Abe Lincoln's. The clock has only moved twice, indicating that he has lied two times".
"Where is George W Bush's clock"? asked the man.
St. Peter replied, "Bush's clock is in Jesus' office, he's using it as a ceiling fan.

[Renew Deal]

1. Another version of this joke.

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks.
Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's President Bush's clock?" asked the man.

"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office.

He's using it as a ceiling fan.

[mwooldri]

2. I've heard this joke with Clinton as the butt of it.

Now, if they rigged up Clinton's clock as a ceiling fan, then they've connected Bush's clock to heaven's electric grid via a generator; they found a great way to reduce heaven-warming since they don't have to burn any fossil fuels anymore.

Mark.

[Name removed]

3. Deleted message

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[Rhiannon12866]

4. I've heard this one and I loved it, LOL!

Except instead of George Washington, it was Mother Teresa. Thanks so much for the reminder! The last line always makes me laugh...:rofl:

on edit: Oops! I missed your subsequent post...:blush: That's the version I heard... And I still love it!:D