|
www.freesqueeze.com/bushmelons.htm
“Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called walking,”
- George W. Bush
I'm certainly no expert, but as a person who has lived, worked and gone to school in Texas for much of my life, I can remember only one other normal sized person walking like Bush does. It was this 5 foot 2 Italian guy from New Jersey. This guy, like Bush, sort of bowed up when he walked and held his arms way out to the side as if to compensate for non-existent shoulder muscles. I've also seen a few sterioded up pretty boys at the gym that held their arms way out the side because they had actually muscled up to such and extent to require it. But basically we Texans walk like everyone else.
Several possibilities of why a person would walk that way:
1. Broken shoulder bones? 2. Painful heat rash in armpits? 3. Over muscled or overweight? 4. Waiting for the deodorant to dry? 5. Want to broadcast your armpit odor? 6. Irritable stubble from recent armpit shaving? 7. Preparing to place two friends in a double headlock?
Does Mr. Bush fit any of these criteria? (no, no, no, no, no, no, and no - although I would love to see Bush bonk Rove and Cheney's heads together)
I have a fallback theory that Mr. Bush is actually carrying two invisible watermelons. It is the best explanation I have been able to come up with. Please feel free to offer your own theory of why Mr. Bush walks with his arms held out this way. Until I hear a better explanation, I'm going with this theory. As the flimsiest of all evidence, here is a picture of Bush emerging from an actual melon patch with those invisible melons in tow.
www.freesqueeze.com/bushmelons.htm
|