Contest: Name Tucker Carlson's New MSNBC show

[moggie12]

Not satisfied with the amount of garbage they're already feeding the American viewing public, MSNBC has hired Tucker Carslon to replace Deborah Norville in the 9pm slot come March:
http://apnews.excite.com/article/20050202/D880M0B00.html

They haven't come up with a name for the show yet. I though some of you might have good suggestions.

All I can come up with so far is "Yet One More Hour With a Right Wing Dickhead."

Any ideas??

1st, 2nd, and 3rd place winners receive inner satisfaction.

[IthinkThereforeIAM]

1. Problem Child: The Series...

..eom

[Mabus]

2. Tucker: Prostitute for the 21st Century

or Prostitute for the Right Wing

on edit: Bowtie Boy's Bloviation Hour

[moggie12]

24. Of your entries, I like "Bowtie Boy's Blovation Hour" best

I seem to have a fondness for entries with lots of B's. Maybe it's just the bow tie thing.

[Hissyspit]

66. That One Gets My Vote

[LittleClarkie]

3. All Tuckered Out

Eh?

[moggie12]

28. and maybe add "And No Place To Go But MSNBC" n/t

[givemebackmycountry]

4. Bow Tie Butt Boy and His Blow Hard Friends....

Brought to you by Keer McGee and Halliburton

[moggie12]

16. Definitely a contender for one of the top prizes

[DRoseDARs]

5. "Jon Stewart Won't Be My Monkey, But I'll Be Your's..."

They should even include one of those little old portable organ grinders that you turned a crank to make music with.

[cry baby]

6. Moggie, I just don't understand this as a business decision of MSNBC

They are going mostly right, but they cannot compete with Faux. Where are their viewers going to come from? Dems will tune out and Faux viewers are staying put with Faux. Seems like idiocy to me.

[moggie12]

18. I know, I know -- it's so stupid

They could make a killing selling top-dollar advertising space to high-end retailers -- all the smart people would watch a smart show! Oh, the humanities.........

[cry baby]

22. If they only looked at how well Air America is doing, they would see

that there is no longer a TV media outlet for "left of center" people. Where are they going? I think they are missing out on a huge market - 59 mil of us voted for a dem!

[Tigress DEM]

60. Intelligent people don't watch TV, so their audience is.....

repubs.

[harpo]

7. MSNBC - who says we're liberal, we'll show you

[autorank]

8. Dweeb!

[moggie12]

26. Hmmm, short, but highly descriptive and accurate

Potential Honorable mention

[autorank]

37. haha, I'll take that. That will make me The Hon. autorank. Love it!

[moggie12]

41. The power and prestige is going to your head already

That's what happens to the politicians -- watch out.

[autorank]

42. Quietly awaiting the conferral of his "honorific" title...

[moggie12]

52. Autorank, please rise out of your swivel chair (I'll wait......)

Ready?

<clearing throat..>

"Hear ye, Hear ye, all you in cyberspace: The poster formerly known as Autorank is hereby to be henceforth and everforthmore be known as the Honorable Autorank and to be treated forevermore with the honor and respect commensurate with that title."


Jesus Christ, I can't even imagine what I'm going to have to do for the 1st place winner........

[autorank]

59. Words fail me...sob...sob...I never thoughg...sob...sob...If Elton John

can be called Lord Elton, I can certainly be the Honorable augorank.

I am in your debt moggie12!

[Bozita]

9. "The Free Kool-Aid Show" or "Our Compassion is Sweeter Than Aspartame"

[Not_Giving_Up]

10. OK, how about...

Slime Time with that Fucker, Tucker!


Ok, maybe not...the FCC might take offense.

[Bozita]

15. I vote for yours

good one!

[Not_Giving_Up]

25. Woohoo! I got a vote!

:bounce:

[Bozita]

27. You deserve it for "Slime Time with that Fucker, Tucker!"

MSNBC is cable. I'm not too sure the FCC has any power here.

[Not_Giving_Up]

30. Thanks! I'm sure the FCC would say that it's just too offensive

or something. Hey, the fucker offends a lot of people, but no one stops him...Maybe I should submit my name as a suggestion to MSNBC, what do you think?

[moggie12]

32. The show or the title?

Oh, that's right, nobody cares if shows are full of lies and propaganda as long as there's no curse words.

[Castilleja]

85. Good one, plus it rhymes!

Always good.........;)

[agates]

11. The Tucker Carlson's Hurting America Show

to paraphrase Jon Stewart...

[moggie12]

19. Jon, is that you?? I heard you lurk here n/t

[Warpy]

12. Payola Punditry

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

13. The "Who Says I Don't Have Talent" Hour.

[jdots]

14. " Springtime for Hitler "

" Captain Clueless & the Turd Maggots "

[TheDonkey]

17. WTF!?! Scarborough and now this fuck.

I remember why I hate the MSM now.

[moggie12]

21. Hey, that's actually not a bad title!

Although people may get the first part confused with the WWF (World Wrestling Federation)

[Mike Niendorff]

20. "Underqualified and Overpaid", featuring Tucker Carlson.

MDN

[OneBlueSky]

23. Tuck It! . . . n/t

[Swamp Rat]

29. "Fucker" n/t

[tkmorris]

31. Leave it to Beavis

Starring Tucker Carlson, as the Beav.

[RafterMan]

33. Just as Big a Dick on MSNBC as I was on CNN

Too long?

[moggie12]

35. Hmmm, a little wordy, maybe "Same Big Dick, New Station" (?) n/t

[artr2]

34. Douchebag Gargles

nt

Edit:spelling

[Mike Niendorff]

36. Or how about simply : "The Party Line", featuring Tucker Carlson.

MDN

[moggie12]

39. Yeah, at the start he could rip the talking points from the fax machine

and then say "Tucker here, with the latest from Karl."

[FrenchieCat]

38. "Presstitute This!"

[98geoduck]

40. SOFTLITTLEBALLS

[AP]

43. "this opinion for sale"

[librechik]

44. kneepads: the series

[moggie12]

53. I can't award you a prize for this one since I went to Catholic School

In fact, I'd probably be in trouble with the nuns just for laughing.

[Jim Sagle]

45. "Fuckface and Friends"

[moggie12]

55. Congrats - you win 2nd Place -- nice use of Fox imagery n/t

[Scout1071]

46. G-Dub's Bitch is Back

[Tigress DEM]

62. Maybe they'll kiss on the show!

:puke:

[Capn Sunshine]

47. MSFire

of oourse.

[Tigress DEM]

63. rim shot! good pun.

[PROGRESSIVE1]

48. "The Tucker/Sucker Newshour"

[ClassWarrior]

49. Tightass.

NGU.

[John_H]

50. "Can your Daddy Get You a Career, too?" n/t

[Sparkly]

51. "Foad Tucker" n/t

[The Minus World]

58. Tucker's Fame

Assuming that "FOAD" stands for "Fuck off and die", you get bonus points for the successful use of a spoonerism!

[Reverend_Smitty]

54. Dickhead in a Bowtie...

at least thats my little pet name for little Tucker

[Vinnie From Indy]

56. The Tucky-Doody Show!

[Acryliccalico]

57. Dubya, Pickles and Me

:kick:

[Tigress DEM]

61. A Fair and Balanced Spew

:bounce:

:puke:
:puke:

[Vinnie From Indy]

64. The Incredible Dolt

What's My Lie?

Punkline

[NY lib NY]

65. "The Facist Hour"

[blm]

67. FORCING AMERICANS INTO HEARING ONLY WHITE HOUSE APPROVED NEWS

This country is FUCKED thanks to the news networks who have replaced real news and information with Right Wing Propaganda for 23 hours a day.

[elare]

68. The Big Dick, featuring the cloned offspring of ...

... Orville Redenbacher & Mork (no offense intended to popcorn lovers or Robin Williams)

[Warren DeMontague]

69. Andrew McCarthy Meets Joe McCarthy

or maybe just "Dick on Dick"

[Neshanic]

70. "Tuckie's Gabfest", or "Tiny Tuck's Old Time Whoredom Hour"

[bluedog]

71. As the Right Wing Spins n/t

[d_b]

72. Confessions of a brown-nose yuppie.

[NotNInch]

73. "SPIN" n/t

[DistressedAmerican]

74. Douchebaggerman!

[lindsayg]

75. Partisan Hackery

with Tucker Carlson

[pearl]

76. How about

"Paid political pundits and their poodles"

[ArtVandaley]

77. "I'm a Fucking Asshole"

That would be appropriate for Tucker

[SCRUBDASHRUB]

78. The Best Little Whorehouse in Washington with your host.....

er....Pimp...Tucker Carlson!

(with apologies to the musical).

So, it's gonna be "whoring with Tweety," then Countdown (thank G-d we'll have some solace and a break), Fucker Carlson and Scarborough? I must be in hell!

[Riding this Donkey]

79. Tuckered Out! n/t

[Riding this Donkey]

80. Or how about Blowhard Bowtie! n/t

[chicagojoe]

81. Tucker Tongues The Chimp

[FormerDittoHead]

82. The Stupid Asshole with the Bowtie Show

says it all, IMO.

[hollowdweller]

83. They put him on after NOW on my local PBS station. I wish NOW was 1hr

again!

[Mz Pip]

84. Twit Time

with Tucker Carlson.

Mz Pip
:dem:

[Califooyah Operative]

86. beyond the bowtie with tucker carlson? nt

[zulchzulu]

87. The Tucker the Parrot Show

Or...maybe Tucker the Motherfucker...

[Wrinkle_In_Time]

88. "Cancelled" n/t