|
We are all supporting our picks with great energy, and that is wonderful, I love seeing that. However, there are seven remaining candidates and we won't all win, in fact, most of us will lose. Will you support the nominee as strongly as you have supported your favorite? We will still need everyones' support and votes in November because the enemy hasn't even shown up to the fight yet. We are just picking our warrior. Let me take some more of your time to point out a flaw in every one of the candidates, and just to be balanced and fair, we will compare that to the alternative.
Howard Dean-Pumps his fist and yells after finishing third in Iowa. gw-Pumps his fist and says 'feels good' after killing tens of thousands of people (mostly civilians).
Wes Clark-Never held elected office. gw-Holds an office he was never elected to.
Rev. Al Sharpton-Has looming questions about paying income tax. gw-Has looming questions about securities fraud, 9-11, drug use, military service, WMD, and Valerie Plame....
John Edwards-Very little political experience. gw-No political experience, he has been a puppet his whole career.
Dennis Kucinich-Has radical, unproven ideas that could weaken our military. gw-Has radical, unproven ideas that do weaken our military.
John Kerry-Voted for the war. gw-Started the war.
Joe Lieberman-Seems too far to the right. gw-Wants to be a fascist dictator.
Let's all make each other a promise that after this fight we won't be too bloody, or too proud to stay in for the big fight. This is the most important election of our time. Eight years of "not my favorite" Democrat, and we live to fight another day. Four more years of bush, and we could lose America. This is mostly a satire, sprinkled with truth, so don't go hating me, I'm just the messenger.
|