The Good Little Monkey

[lwcon]

Once there was a good little monkey that could never do wrong.

He came to town one day, and everyone said "now, there's a good little monkey that could never do wrong."

Actually, more than half the monkeys didn't trust him at all.

But he told the Monkey Court that he was a good little monkey that could never do wrong, and they nodded their approval. They decided he would be the Monkey King!

The good little monkey told everyone that he wasn't a big, fancy king. He was just a good little monkey like they might be one day, if their fathers had been head of the CIA and if they got their coke habits under control.

The other monkeys nodded their approval. "Boy," they said, "I'd sure like to drink some mead with that good little monkey, if he ever goes off the wagon."

One day, a concerned macaw told the good little monkey that jackals were planning to swoop in and eat some of the monkeys. But the good little monkey was on vacation, as he always was since he became the Monkey King.

About a month later, jackals swooped in and ate some of the monkeys.

The good little monkey held up the bones of the dead monkeys and said "no one could have predicted that jackals would swoop in and eat some of the monkeys."

The surviving monkeys wept, as they nodded their approval.

The good little monkey that could never do wrong said that if he were the Monkey Emperor, the jackals would never come back. The other monkeys nodded their approval.

And for years, the jackals never came back. So it was a happy time in the jungle.

Sure, thousands of monkeys died when the good little monkey that could never do wrong sent them to do battle with the wolves. And if tens of thousands of spaniels and dachshunds were caught in the crossfire, it was a small price to pay for keeping the jackals away and spreading banana republicanism.

Who cared that all the other animals in the jungle began to shun the monkeys and not-so-secretly wished to whack them on the head with coconuts? If there was ever a fire or flood in the jungle, they'd help out for sure. And if they didn't, there was always the well-rested Monkey Emperor who would make everything right.

One day, a member of the monkey media said she was starting to wonder whether the Monkey Emperor was, in fact, a good little monkey that could never do wrong. The other monkeys stared at her.

She said that the Monkey Emperor was giving all the food to the wealthiest monkeys and that he'd been up to a lot of business that he had no business doing, including warrantless wiretapping and waterboarding. And, besides, why did we attack the wolves, when it was the jackals who swooped in and ate some of the monkeys?

The other monkeys laughed and laughed at her, the way that only monkeys can.

Moral: "If you can't trust a good little monkey that could never do wrong, who can you trust?"

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[rock]

1. Say, this really isn't about a good little monkey

is it?

[lwcon]

2. I hope I'm not misconstrued

I know there are some bad people who refer to our chief executive as being chimp-like, because he facially resembles a monkey, because he exhibits the impulsive behavior of an untrained ape, and because his policies aren't consistent with the mind of an evolved species.

But me, I agree with Britney Spears: "Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that, you know, and be faithful in what happens."

What I meant, your majesty...
___

Hey, the liberal light is always on at the Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy. Please stop by and say "hi!"

P.S, the Blogger site has been coughing up hairballs all morning; if my site's down now, please check back in later.