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Edited on Mon Oct-15-07 12:52 AM by NanceGreggs
It would seem virtually impossible that this far along in the Bush presidency, there are still bodies being retrieved from under the BushCo Bus with a look of utter surprise on their faces, as though they never saw it coming.
The first casualties were early on, those who stood patiently at the corner, waiting for that compassionate conservatism to arrive as promised, followed by the faithful who actually believed that their Commander-in-Chief would stick to his word when he stated that he would never send US troops into combat without a clear exit strategy.
Perhaps the most trusting of the now dearly departed were the Fundies who, having voted for Bush in 2000 on his promise of a Constitutional amendment forever barring same-sex marriage, were mowed down in vast numbers after their born-again savior pro tem dropped the topic like a hot crucifix the minute he put his hand on the Bible, crossed his fingers behind his back, and swore to all kinds of things he never intended to do.
One can only suppose that an unwavering belief in resurrection has its merits, because those same Fundies came out in droves to vote Saint W (Patron Saint of Torturers) into office a second time based on the same promise – which, of course, turned out to be no closer to the Altar of Fulfillment than it was the first time he bellowed that hymn from the campaign pulpit.
Over the years, the BushCo Bus has caused almost as many casualties as the War in Iraq, forever turning the corner and plowing down the dwindling multitudes who have emptied their heads and their pockets in order to keep the tank full and the pandering-pedal to the metal. One by one, those who believed the rhetoric on issues like No Child Left Behind and the rebuilding of New Orleans found themselves ground into puddles of blood on the pavement by the very vehicle they’d been told would be their ride to better things.
But the latest group of about-to-become-roadkill was really in a position to know better than all of us: the Republicans who are now facing an election that threatens to scatter more bodies across the political highway than a possum convention headed across the interstate during rush hour.
In the wake of their fearless leader’s recent veto of an expansion of SCHIP, one GOPer summed up the impact on his party with the understatement of the century: “We are not happy, no doubt about it.”
Not happy? Say, fella, why the long face? Just because your president has just handed the Democrats yet another stick to beat you over the head with, is that any reason to stop smilin’ like the Village Idiot?
Hey, buck up. It’s not like we didn’t already have enough ammunition to send you people packin’ come next fall – the War in Iraq, the faltering economy, spying on US citizens, and the other things you rubber-stamped back in the day. Just think of Bush’s War on Sick Children as yet another under-the-bus trip that will be added to the cause-of-death line when the GOP autopsy results are finalized and made public in November 2008.
As for Ed Gillespie’s comments that had Republicans sided with Democrats on the health program, they would have opened themselves to criticism from conservatives and been in a worse position than they are now, I can assure you that being in a worse position than you are now isn’t even possible, so don’t beat yourselves up – the voters will be happy to do that job for you.
Now, I don’t want to say that the Republican Party was out-and-out delusional in their belief that the very man they’d cheered, backed to the hilt, supported in every scatterbrained idea he ever had, wouldn't wind up eventually throwing them under the same bus he’s been aiming towards a cliff since he got into office – hey, who am I kiddin’? Of course I want to say they were delusional, simply because they were – and continue to be.
A prime example is another Republican who had the chutzpah to suggest that the SCHIP fiasco resulted in one of those oft-talked about mushroom clouds, a blast strong enough to knock the GOP off their Party of Fiscal Responsibility horse just as they were about to call it in from the pasture where it has been languishing, and ride it into 2008 election victory.
Well, let me be the one to let the not-so-Grand Ol’ Party in on the worst-kept secret of the decade: not only is that horse long out of the barn, he rode off into the sunset with several saddlebags full of billions of taxpayer dollars years ago, and hasn’t been seen since.
So welcome to the underside of the BushCo Bus, my across-the-aisle friends, and don’t get too comfortable on the coroner’s table – there’s undoubtedly more death and destruction headed your way before the fat lady sings at your funeral.
And as they lower your now-sullied flag-draped casket - covered in Support the Troops bumperstickers, plastered with indictments for corruption, and festooned with toilet paper from public men’s rooms across the country – that look of surprise on your corpse will be a lasting memory for all of us to laugh at in the days to come.
“Democrats have reason to be worried,” said Jessica Boulanger, a spokeswoman for the National Republican Congressional Committee.
Yeah, Jessica. We’re all shakin’ in our boots.
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