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Who's with me on this, huh? Finally, finally, we can begin listening in to people talking in the one country in the world where we KNOW bin Laden is. That's right, he's obviously here in the good ole U.S. He's obviously been here all along, or there wouldn't have been such a big demand to spy on our own phone lines and emails! (Hint, hint, we know one of you is probably hiding him at this very moment, but your complicity shall henceforth be short-lived, you traitorist!) Well, we can all relax now, because we've finally GOT OUR EYE ON THE BALL. The hunt for bin Laden is ON, and we're bound to find him now. (My personal guess is that he's been sending those hard-on spam emails and offers pretending he's the King of Nigeria or posing as a robo-push-pollster.) You hear me, bin Laden--it IS ON! Finally, we have some much needed FOCUS on our hunt for the leader of the enemy. No more distractions now. No more politics and posturing. No, sir. And until the traitorists out there somewhere in this fine land of ours who are harboring him and helping him type his emails in American fess up or are uncovered, I'll be watching all of you. Until then you're ALL traitorists to me! Thanks, FISA!
Oh, and hi, FBI guys.
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