Real change.

[Neshanic]

This Obama thing had me pretty devastated. Being part of a party that can be so pliant in the face of evil. Being able to excuse this but not that. A runaway train with no tracks.

Religion is not new to me. I was raised in a very liberal Methodist church in a very liberal small town which is my screen name as maybe you did not know. It really is and was the paradise of growing up. Playing in fields and swimming in the river. Trips into the city to see all that it had to offer on weekends. Small town that had a Methodist church and when I was there, a woman minister for a time; quite a surprise in the early seventies.

When I was 20 I went to ASU and have been in Arizona ever since. My best friend a fraternity brother later after graduation became a fundamentalist. He tried to pull me over time and time again. I always pushed him off about it. He gave me all the reasons.

After a long talk last night I decided that I am going to take him up on his offer to exorcise me and go intoa gay deprogram. He is one of the main ministers of a what would be called a mega church, but I do not want to use that description any longer. It is based in theSan Diego area.

I am am old and gay,(not for long) and my friend the Minister is right. Jesus is the answer, and things in life are easier when you giveyourself up. The only man I loved is dead, and trying to finda way to live in a place of beliefs that are wrong and confusing even for the people that try to live in it's land of up is down and rabbit hole logic.

My goal is to be deprogrammed out of my gay lifestyle. My buddy says he can do it with the help of his congregation. Then I think the real right and wrong willbe revealed.

It's strange how things turn out. I want to thank the people who stayed the course of keeping Warren on the program. Without that fight and discussion, my converstaion would not of occured. I look forward to movingto California, I always wanted to live there.

I will be blogging hopefully about this process, and I hope you all will be supportive.

Love in Jesus
Neshanic

[99th_Monkey]

1. By all means, keep us posted ...

I'm curious how the "Obama thing" is playing into your conversion. The connection isn't entirely
clear to me.

Your story is strangely similar to my own "conversion" to Christianity decades ago now, because
I had an "old friend" who'd been "praying for me" and who was by that time a pastor leading a
hippy "Jesus freak" commune ... it was a time of healing from one standpoint, and a time of being
kind of derailed or backwatered from another point of view.

The gay thing was/is not a factor, as I'm straight, but I felt moved to wish you well on your
journey anyway. ;-)

[LWolf]

2. Unconditional love

does not require "reprogramming." Relationships are not about changing people, but about loving them for who they are, the way they are. About listening, and allowing people to work through their own issues. About offering a hand, or a shoulder to lean, or cry, on when needed, but not about "advice" or "fixing."

In my opinion, of course.

I'll listen as you work your way through your issues. For what it's worth, I offer you my best hopes and wishes for a healthy, peaceful outcome.

[Neshanic]

4. Well being gay is the problem, and I will not be very soon.

It has been the root of all that has happened to me in my life, and truthfully I want not to be gay anymore. My college buddy Pastor says there is no reason that I will be when I finish with them. Then thing will be much different and better.

To have that peace is everything.

Thank you for the kindness.

Bless You,
Neshanic

[Neshanic]

3. Thank you. He has been a good friend, and when he explained why

there were the conflicts of Pastor Warren to me, among other things about being gay and how he could help and make life better for me, I accepted his invitation. I don't think I will be posting frequently in the future, if at all. There is the issue that I have to sever the ties that my Pastor friend says are not helpfull.

I am hoping that from time to time I will be here, but am not sure not knowing what will happen after I move to California.

I can't wait to move, and I have alot to do before I go. I ending one life in Phoenix to begin another in San Diego.

It will be a a relief not to deal with conflict,and have a solid foudation to start a new life.

Bless You

Neshanic