Ashton Kutcher pumps iron, does yoga, buys guns in preparation for Armageddon

[Amerigo Vespucci]

Ashton Kutcher is in hard training for the apocalypse, but this no big screen role: he's afraid that armageddon is coming.

Speaking to Men's Fitness, Kutcher predicts that the "end of days" is on its way, and he wants to be prepared for the inevitable madness. He told the magazine (quotes via JustJared):

"It won't take very much, I'm telling you. It will not take much for people to hit the panic button. The amount of convenience that people rely on based on electricity alone. You start taking out electricity and satellites, and people are going to lose their noodle. People don't have maps anymore. People use their iPhones or GPS systems, so if there's no electricity, nobody has maps."

And then what? The way Kutcher sees it, all chaos breaks.

"And people are going to go, 'That land's not yours, prove that it's yours,' and the only thing you have to prove it's yours is on an electric file. Then it's like, 'What's the value of currency, and whose food is whose?' People's alarm systems at their homes will no longer work. Neither will our heating, our garbage disposals, hot-water heaters that run on gas but depend on electricity - what happens when all our modern conveniences fail? I'm going to be ready to take myself and my family to a safe place where they don't have to worry."

So what's a soothsaying star supposed to do when he sees the end of the world? Kutcher is stocking up on guns and spending hours and hours running the canyons near his home, pushed on by visions of being chased by wild boar. He's also taking daily bikram yoga sessions, and learning Krav Maga, a deadly Israeli combat technique taught to high-powered special ops.

"All of my physical fitness regimen is completely tailored around the end of day. I stay fit for no other reason than to save the people I care about."

Sounds like his toughest role yet.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/29/ashton-kutcher-in-mens-fitness-preparing-for-armageddon_n_802210.html

[SpiralHawk]

1. "People are going to lose their noodle..."

Apparently, some have already...

[Whoa_Nelly]

2. Well, then! Can't wait to see his Photo shoot commercials on this! Woohoo!n/t

[itsrobert]

3. And people say pot doesn't have any effect on people

Just say no to drugs and fantasy religions.

[orwell]

4. So that's what...

...too much sex will do to you...

[texshelters]

12. It's the STDs that do it, not the sex

Peace,
Tex Shelters

[FSogol]

5. Apocalypse for Kutcher will occur when his next 2 movies bomb.

I can't think of anything dumber than relying on Aston Kutcher to save people at the end of days.

[WillParkinson]

6. A lady at work

Insists the end time is coming.

[nashville_brook]

7. he should be stocking up on solar cells instead of guns.

but, i love the idea of a delusional Kutcher stalking hollywood celebrities as enemies of the state. he should go after Steven Baldwin first.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

10. My first impression after reading the article...

...was that they BOTH can't save humanity. In order for Kutcher's mission to be successful, he's gonna have to take Baldwin out FIRST.

:rofl:

:toast:

[hlthe2b]

8. Demi sure knows how to pick 'em...

Of course, since Willis is a RWer, perhaps she and Kutcher are too?

[tridim]

9. Dude, where's my car?

I'd tell you but I don't have a map, and such as.

[droidamus2]

11. Interesting...

I was just thinking lately that all those 'aliens come down to blow us up' movies had it wrong when all the aliens would have to do is disrupt electricity all over the planet. Though I think Kutcher's 'end of days' talk is silly I think his thinking about what would happen if all of a sudden there was no electricity available are pretty on the nose. Sure for awhile you would have local generators or personal generators to keep personal things running but it wouldn't take long for everything to shut down. Of course, when he says he will take his family to 'somewhere safe' where exactly would that be. The places I could think of that would be safe are those areas where nobody lives now and the reason they don't live there is it is very hard to impossible to live there. If this kind of societal breakdown ever occurred I don't really think any place would be safe. It would be law of the jungle and when all was said and done that jungle would probably not be a place you would really want to live.

[EC]

13. Sounds like Willis

put these thoughts in his head...

[qb]

14. It sounds like he's counting on being Left Behind.

Waiting for the Rapture doesn't require that much preparation.
:crazy:

[Bluenorthwest]

15. Everbody has: iphones, gps and home security systems

and not one blessed fucker has a map. What a mind.

[Fire Walk With Me]

16. Actually, "Bikram" is capitalized...it's a he, not a what...

;)

[wildbilln864]

17. k&r! nt