I find challenging music to be very rewarding when it finally clicks. Sometimes that takes awhile. I listened to the band Deathspell Omega for a couple of years before one song finally pushed them over the top for me and made me "get" them. It was almost 20 minutes long and was just amazing. And the lyrics...holy shit! But they were, and still are, a very challenging listen, and this from someone who was already very into the black metal genre. They're the first BM band that I can say truly transcends their genre.
Music and movies and books don't have to make me feel good. I'm just as pleased when something makes me squirm, or even forces me to ask myself, "Why the fuck am I into this?". I like being made to feel uncomfortable. It shakes me out of any comfort zone and makes me reassess things about myself or the world.
This stuff here that you've posted is awesome. My friend is heavily into the noise scene (artists like Merzbow, Sightings, John Weise, etc), and I've always been into techno/industrial stuff, and Autechre seems to straddle those two genres nicely. Reminds me a bit of a band I just discovered earlier this year called Blackfilm, only a touch less ambient.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y544VF0I1-UHere's a taste of the "noise" type stuff I dig. This is harsher ambient than Blackfilm and much less beat driven than Autechre (there is no beat period lol), but I'm massively hooked on the CD. This is the band Sewer Goddess, and I listen a lot of stuff like this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfdfzslZ1GYSaving the hardest for last. Here's the Deathspell Omega song that hooked me. It does something different every two minutes, and has more to chew on the the entire catalogs of other BM bands. Don't feel bad if you don't like this. This is harsh, extreme music. But if you like a good musical challenge, you'll be hard pressed to find a tougher one than this, musically and lyrically. Thanks again for the links to Autechre. I will search out more of them!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olN6UpUC6v4&feature=related“What matter the victims, provided the gesture is beautiful?
What matters the death of vague human beings,
If thereby the individual affirms himself?” – Laurent Tailhade
The black Idol emerges as a silver lining in a dust cloud of death,
Eerie parallel tongues and the piping of heaven
The culture of transgression is mine and my descent
Makes me ascend in a repugnant swirl…
Sic volo,
Sic jubeo,
Stat pro ratione voluntas
The black Idol fills the veil of flesh with noxious smoke,
Depicting primal human experiences indifferently,
Contemptuous of moral concerns, dehumanized
The howling of wolves and the destructive sword are portions of Eternity,
Too great for the eyes of merely a man…
Transcendence of thresholds occurs with violence
And will for Vice is like the mind's dark radiance
Which blinds and of which I'm dying
Corruption is the spiritual cancer reigning in the depths of things
And it fills until the last cell of my vivid being
Dissolution and putrefaction, prevailing Aesthetic experience,
The splendor of the obscene and inhuman;
For what matters the death of a vague human beings
If thereby the individual affirms himself?
Violence exists in the moment when the eye turns upwards into the head,
When inversion is complete and total
The darkness of the upturned eye is not the absence of light
But the process of seeing being taken to its limit
That thorough derangement of the senses,
Way beyond the deceptive conflict between darkness and light
Opens perceptions to the tyranny of the Chekhinah…
Si non credideritis,
Non inteligetis
The dimension of ethereal totalitarianism discloses itself
And takes possession of the quintessential human soul
Like a nail hammered through most tender flesh
Aeons separate the one whose eyes have seen through the night of the spirit
The king, the Lord of hosts, draped in terrifying magnificence
From the gleaming clot of trembling vermin
If a faith and a belief aren't nurtured by the moist of blood
They do not grow, nor do they live
It is at the magnitude of daily murders, massacres and mass graves
That we do measure the propagation of our faith
Hearken and recognize, that hideous carrion
Legs in the air, like a whore – displayed, indifferent to the last
A belly slick with lethal sweat and swollen with foul gas…
This is you, nourishing
The grand Mass Grave Aesthetics!