Do a-Pastafarians have a choice?

[beam me up scottie]

Do they choose to not believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

I mean, we all know He's real.

I think non-believers just choose to deny Him.

[Hokie]

1. Non-believers will go to pasta-hell

They will be flattened by giant meatballs and drowned in millions of gallons of marinara sauce.

[Oversea Visitor]

4. I am christian

What do you believe in ? x(

[Canuckistanian]

30. Yes, they will burn in pasta hell

Actually, they'll be boiled in lightly salted water for 7-15 minutes, be rinsed, drained and drizzled with a good quality olive oil.

[beam me up scottie]

32. Now I'm hungry again.

:evilfrown:

[Dogmudgeon]

2. Whatever happened to JR "BOB" Dobbs?

We're so fickle in our choice of ShorDurPerSavs (Short Duration Personal Saviors).

--p!

[salvorhardin]

6. There is nothing incompatible between slack and pastafarianism

After all, pirates are all about the slack. OK. The gold doubloons and treasure too, but mostly the slack.

[Dogmudgeon]

7. Ah, yes! Polypastism!

I hear it's popular in the New Recipe movement. You know, Fagioli Shui and the veneration of crystal (as in, "the guest crystal") and the Grateful Fed and all that.

But I draw the line at Panpastism, mainly because I don't believe that meat is just another "inCARNation" of pasta.

Of course, I could be wrong.

--p!

[beam me up scottie]

8. He's the wrong god.

An impostor.

You can read the truth about The Real God in the gospel available now at The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.



Accept no substitutions.

http://www.venganza.org/

[Dogmudgeon]

10. You call that spaghetti?

The Christians depict Jesus as a tall, red-haired Caucasian, probably modeled on a Lombard from northern Italy.

I wonder why the FSM is likewise depicted as being the Flying Bean Sprout Monster.

With Swedish meatballs, no less.

Jesus was a Jew; a pre-Roman, pre-Turkic-Islamic-caliphate, pre-Khazar Semite. Short, chubby, with larger lips and nose than the usual European. Not exactly Jackie Mason, but not quite John Tesh, either.

So, too, do the legends of fine pasta and rich sauce conflict with the popularized image of Bean Sprouts and Swedish Meatballs bereft of sauce of any kind.

It deeply puzzles me.

What, indeed, is the truth of the matter?

--p!
Bork a-bork bork bork.

[beam me up scottie]

12. The gospel is not meant to be taken literally.

Unless, of course, it supports your current agenda.

Here's my card:



Ring me up later.

We'll talk.

:evilgrin:

[HysteryDiagnosis]

3. Would the Flying Spaghetti Monster give his children a

stone if they asked for a meatball?? Hmmmmmmm??? I think not. He should be revered for the saucy sentient being that he is.

[beam me up scottie]

43. For the love of humanity, think of the children !!!

[C_U_L8R]

5. when the dessert-times come

the non-believers will be without blessed tiramisu.
and as we sip sacred double espresso in paradise
their spirits will starve in seventy levels of junk food hades.

What a pity.. they chose to dine at the wrong altar.

[beam me up scottie]

9. Yes, they are damned to Hell for all eternity for choosing the wrong god.

Or worse, :scared: choosing no god at all.

I weep for the poor fools who deny The Noodley One's disciples; Santa, The Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy and The Great Pumpkin, for they are doing the Devil's work.

[WhollyHeretic]

11. Everyone serves the Great Noodley One

Whether they know it or not they are all part of his grand dinner plans, the only choice is whether or not people will be pulling a chair a chair up to that eternal checkered table cloth when they die or if they will be tossed into an never-ending dish of rotting antipasto.

[beam me up scottie]

13. Or, horror of horrors,

the 9th level, Lasagne Hell. :scared:

[A Simple Game]

45. Let me see if I have got this straight!

In heaven you have an endless supply of Spaghetti, and in hell you have an endless supply of Lasagna?

Sounds like a can't lose to me, sign me up!

[beam me up scottie]

46. Hal-Ay-Nood-La !!!

That's what I'm talking about!

Even our Hell is better than theirs!

[A Simple Game]

47. As an added bonus,

I don't think you can gain weight in the afterlife.

[beam me up scottie]

48. Oh, I forgot to tell you about the Beer Volcanoes.

Another one of the perks.

[mom cat]

52. You just sold me! ... Their hell stinks!

[beam me up scottie]

53. Yay !!!

Another pirate !!!

[NMMNG]

14. rAmen!

All hail his noodly appendages. :applause:

[beam me up scottie]

15. I find it odd,

that all of the believers who told us that we "chose" to not believe in their silly deities haven't shown up to praise or deny the Noodley One.

You can't argue with The Truth.

[NMMNG]

23. Nor can you argue with marinara sauce.

:9

[beam me up scottie]

24. I'm hungry now.

Time to partake in the symbolic eating ritual. :P

[Klukie]

34. Here is some truth.....

You put up a deity that everyone on the planet knows to be false and you compare it to a deity that a vast majority of folks actually believe in. No quite a fair argument. Mabye I'm just being silly.

[beam me up scottie]

38. You could easily believe if you chose to. That is a fact.

I don't believe many things, but I recognize the FACT that anyone CAN, if they want to.

We are surrounded by all kinds of belief systems -- we choose which belief systems suit us.

To not believe in a concept is a choice, because it is a conclusion that diverges from another. Furthermore, it is also a fact that individuals have a choice of what they do on every matter, this being no exception.

You create your reality by your thoughts and beliefs.

[TechBear_Seattle]

44. "The vast majority believe in"?

Which god, exactly, is that?

Is it the Three-In-One? Or the One Only? If the One Only, is it the One Only who sent Jesus as His Final Prophet, or the one who sent Muhammad? If the Three-In-One, is the Three-In-One who is represented on earth by the Bishop of Rome, the Three-In-One who is represented on earth by a council headed by the Patriarch of Constantinople, the Three-In-One who is represented sola scriptura as understood by the inspiration of one third of the Three-In-One, or by one of the many variations thereof?

Or perhaps is is one of the manifold expressions of the Divine Unity, Brahman, worshipped variously as Bramah, Vishnu, Shiva, Agni, Ganesha, Kali, Parvati and Vashti, among many hundreds?

Or maybe the god the vast majority believe in is not a god at all, such as Siddartha Buddha or one of the several hundred other Enlightened Ones? Or perhaps it is one of the kami, such as Amaterasu?

Since you mention a god that the vast majority belive it, it can't possibly be one of the thousands of gods who have by and large fallen by the wayside, such as Zeus, Thor, Cybel, Asherah, El (from Babylon), El (from Assyria), El (from Sumaria), Yah (from Canaan), Yah (from Samarita), Osiris, Aset, Tlaloc or Pele. Or could it?

Really, which god is the one that the vast majority believe in?

[Klukie]

49. God in a general sense...

or a higher power if you will. I'm just saying that a whole lot of folks do believe and The last time I heard it was the majority.

[TechBear_Seattle]

54. Might I suggest that you ask

Pat Robertson, Osama Bin Laden and His Holiness Benedict XVI if they worship god "in a general sense."

You will very quickly find out that there is no such thing.

[Klukie]

55. You are right....

These folks wouldn't view their god that way, however they are the figureheads. I really think there are alot of folks that believe in god in the general sense. Especially the younger generations. People like Pat Robertson, and Osama bin Laden are the extremists. They most definately have their followers but I don't think they represent the majority of believers. Now the pope has got many folks with him, but I am always amazed at how many people I meet that call themselves non-practicing catholics ( in other words; they really don't believe the teachings). So I respectfully have to disagree that god in a general sense doesn't exist. I would even offer that god in a general sense is on the rise.

[immoderate]

57. I think that those folks...

those that belive in god "in a general way," would also come under the heading of agnostic. That means without knowledge.

--IMM

[Klukie]

58. No I don't think so.....

because none of us have true knowledge. I view an agnostic as someone who makes no decision either way because they have no evidence. I am talking about those of us who believe in a god or higher power or creator without any proof. I don't think we believe that one particular god is right or wrong (Christian god/Jesus, Allah, Etc.), we just believe in god. I really think many of us who do beleive are becoming increasing turned off by the hypocrisy of many religions or we even doubt the substance of what they are teaching, but these religious theories of who god is and how he wants us to live don't deter us from believing in god.

[JVS]

16. So which are you saying, free will or some variant of predestination?

[beam me up scottie]

17. Take your pick.

I don't believe many things, but I recognize the FACT that anyone CAN, if they want to.

We are surrounded by all kinds of belief systems -- we choose which belief systems suit us.

To not believe in a concept is a choice, because it is a conclusion that diverges from another. Furthermore, it is also a fact that individuals have a choice of what they do on every matter, this being no exception.


You create your reality by your thoughts and beliefs.

You could easily believe if you chose to. That is a fact.

[JVS]

18. What are the doctrinal sources of Pastafarianism and what do they say...

on this matter?

[beam me up scottie]

20. You mean The Truth?

http://www.venganza.org/images/spreadword/fsm_brochure2.pdf
http://www.venganza.org/images/spreadword/sk_brochure.pdf
http://www.venganza.org/images/spreadword/fsm_brochure2.pdf


Convert, while you can!

To deny Him is to deny The Truth!

[Maat]

19. I would NEVER deny the FSM!

He's just a perfect manifestation of the One! Or he's the perfect perception of the One (the Universal Consciousness)! Or he's a Pastafarian's perception of the One. Or something.

HeeHee.

My hubby is a Pastafarian.

Dang you people! Now, I am REALLY hungry! And I have to go put my kid to bed! And, I forgot to get new desserts! Oh, bother! I'll be back in a half hour.

[beam me up scottie]

21. I'll start the marinara!

:evilgrin:

[Maat]

22. Mmmmm ..

:)

[muriel_volestrangler]

25. I've heard they have a choice

of french fries or rice. The poor impoverished souls.

[beam me up scottie]

26. Sad,

isn't it?

As a Pastafarian, they would learn that you don't need side dishes in order to be truly fulfilled.

[DarkTirade]

27. Pastafarians may believe, but that doesn't mean they're not heretics.

We all know that His Noodly Greatness created the world, yes. It's a long story involving mountains, a midget, and pirates.
But they practice His Great Teachings wrong.
The True Followers (tm) of His Noodlyness are the pastamancers. The true pastamancers have followed his Noodly Ways for far longer than you can imagine. From the journeys of his Chosen People (italians) to the horrors of the Ramen Invasion, we all have followed his Blessed Noodles for far longer than you will ever know.
"Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of low-carb fad diets, I will fear no weight gain." Italians 4:17

[beam me up scottie]

28. Nice!

Love the pic in your sig line, too!

[DarkTirade]

35. Yeah, I saw a bumper sticker that said

Welcome to the US. Now learn to speak english.
So I spoofed that on cafepress. :)
I also made a spoof of the man+woman=marriage one with fork+spoon=marriage. :) http://www.cafepress.com/marriagefork.39150887

[beam me up scottie]

39. ROFL!

I could put that on my car here!

The fundies would have no clue that I was mocking them~!

[DarkTirade]

56. Yeah, I just need to find a good place to advertise.

That and I need to go back into the graphics and add the plus sign... I just noticed that it's just fork spoon = marriage, not fork + spoon. :)

[intheflow]

29. Are you saying you're not pro-choice?

:hide:





:rofl: For my real views on the matter, see my sig line. :P

[beam me up scottie]

31. Everything is a choice!

And nothing is a choice!

His Noodleyness graciously accepts converts from the Church Of The Tao Turtle.

You are forgiven, child.

:evilgrin:

[Faygo Kid]

33. I have no choice but to believe. "There's no place like home."

Wait a minute, that's another belief. Still, linguini stirs my heart.

[beam me up scottie]

40. All beliefs are the same.

People just pick and choose what they want to believe.

[Anarcho-Socialist]

36. Non-believers like to stir up trouble, instead of stirring up pasta

They are part of an inherit anti-FSM bias, and deny the Pastafarian principles which the U.S. were founded upon. It is no accident that 1776 was in the age of the pirates. I'm sick of being told to shut up whenever I protest for better rights for pirates, and the hatred shown towards our religious traditions is sickening. September 19th last year saw anti-Speak Like A Pirate Day demonstrations which showed discrimination against the Pastafarian community, those haters!

[beam me up scottie]

41. FREE MY PEOPLE !

The Pastafarian Pirates have been oppressed and persecuted for centuries!

[Strong Atheist]

37. Bah, humbug! nt.

[beam me up scottie]

42. Another infidel.

I can't wait to tell you I told you so.

When you're cooking in Lasagna Hell because you rejected Him, don't come crying to me.

SUFFER.

[Random_Australian]

50. All hail Baked Potatoes!

All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!
All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!
All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!All hail Baked Potatoes!

[beam me up scottie]

51. That does it!

Prepare to be smited !!!

[Anarcho-Socialist]

59. There are lots of haters out there

Here's a post by a non-believer attacking the one true faith on a "sceptic" blog. http://www.neuralgourmet.com/1969/12/31/the_fsms_own_nutty_wankjobs

I think those who deny the FSM are way evil.