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cbayer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-02-10 05:40 PM
Original message
Who Gets Bullied in America's Schools
Hi, all. My father writes a weekly column for a local paper and I though this week's article might be of interest. FWIW, he is a retired minister who has devoted his life to social justice and progressive causes, and, at 80 years old, continues be an activist.

WHO GETS BULLIED IN AMERICA’S SCHOOLS? (12/1)

During a three-month period in the mid 1980s, I presided at the funerals of three remarkable boys. Each of them had committed suicide. In each case the parents, as well as the rest of us, were at a loss to explain why these lads had decided to take their own lives. The one I remember most clearly was Jason (not his real name). Jason was a bright, fun-loving, perfectly delightful 14 year old. He was the bright light of his Sunday School class, and loved by those in the church who knew him—that included practically everybody. Jason was delightfully gregarious! Late one night I was called to his family’s house. His parents had found him hung from a rafter in the basement. I spent all that night at the hospital with them, until Jason was finally pronounced dead.

I had heard that Jason was the object of continual teasing at his Jr. High School; ridicule which grew into bullying. I subsequently learned that a few days before his death a group of the bullies had wrestled him into a large trash can, clamped on the lid and ran off laughing. We do not know what caused their hostility. Jason was a mild mannered, sweet natured, and rather unmasculine lad.

Today we might speculate about his sexual orientation. We now know that in America’s schools gay boys are overwhelmingly the butt of cruel acts perpetrated by their male schoolmates. 80% of GLBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender) students have reported being verbally harassed, and 49% report having been physically assaulted during the past year. (2009 National School Climate Survey) Nearly two-thirds of them felt unsafe in their school, and unsupported by their teachers and their principals. It is further known that these students suffered from depression, anxiety and low self-esteem—all the things that may make suicide attractive. Indeed the suicide rate of these students is three to four times higher than that of their straight counterparts (Save the Schools, as reported by The Williams Institute of the UCLA Law School.)

A quarter century ago I had neither the information nor the wisdom to realize what might have been the cause of Jason’s tragic death, or that of the other two boys. Homosexuality was not discussed anywhere in my world. As in our day, back then fully 10% of the population had a different sexual orientation, but nobody admitted it and nobody talked about it. There might have been a few lewd jokes, but little understanding of what homosexuality really entailed.

Even in these more enlightened days bullying of more fragile and defenseless boys is on the rise. Young girls are not that often physically abused, but are simply walled out of the cliques which are everywhere present. Shunning can be just as dangerous as physical assaults.

Today we are not without the resources needed to address the problem. Two months ago this subject was on everyone’s agenda, but like many important issues, it vanished from view as quickly at it had appeared.

Perhaps the first line of defense lies with parents of the bullies. It is far more serious than “boys will be boys.” Teachers and school administrators need to know what is happening under their noses, and to take direct action. “The Trevor Project” (www.thetrevorproject.org) has both literature and a film which has been shown in hundreds of Junior and Senior High Schools. If you suspect that a child has been bullied, for whatever reason, and is in danger of harming himself, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 800-273 8255. And be aware that Gay youngsters may be more at risk than others.

There may be issues individuals can do little about. This is one where you might make a life and death difference.

Charles Bayer
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struggle4progress Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-02-10 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
1. It perpetuates gender stereotypes to assume "mild mannered, sweet natured, and rather unmasculine"
Edited on Thu Dec-02-10 06:12 PM by struggle4progress
boys are gay -- in the same way that gender stereotypes are perpetuated by assuming that girls must be lesbians, if tomboyish and somewhat aggressive and not "attractive" according to mass-media standards
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bbdad Donating Member (111 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-02-10 07:38 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Although I appreciate the article for calling attention
to the problem of the bullying of kids in schools, I agree with you completely about the stereotyping. In fact, I'm sick and tired of it. In both the gay and the straight male populations, there is a range from apparent masculinity to supposed effeminacy. I've personally known guys who spoke with a slight feminine twang, but ended up getting married and having children. And there are gay men who are rugged athletes, for crying out loud. I'm amazed that people continue to believe in these false stereotypes, despite evidence to the contrary.

Now, as to the question of who gets bullied in schools, the answer is just about any student who is perceived to be "different" in some way. Wears glasses or is overweight or lacks self-confidence or (heaven forbid) is studious, etc. You name it. Yes, gay students are especially subjected to bullying; but my friends include several guys who were subjected to vicious forms of bullying (including acts of physical violence) but were NOT gay. Nonathletic boys are frequently subjected to bullying simply because they have no interest in sports, despite the fact that the stereotypes I alluded to above are FALSE.
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bluestateguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-02-10 08:38 PM
Response to Original message
3. Similarly, bieng insufficiently masculine Alpha Male can attract bullying too
I am 100% heterosexual, but because I was deemed insufficiently masculine and "manly" I was subjected to taunting for being gay anyway.
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bbdad Donating Member (111 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-10 01:49 AM
Response to Reply #3
5. What's so ludicrous about that is the fact that
many of the most courageous men in history were not athletes.
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bbdad Donating Member (111 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 02:30 AM
Response to Reply #3
7. This is what the sports culture is all about.
In your heart you know I'm right.
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Kucinich Feingold Donating Member (176 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-18-10 11:00 AM
Response to Reply #7
14. Macho jocks are huge repuke supporters
I would love to see their faces if they ever heard a player on the team was homosexual.
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Smarmie Doofus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-03-10 07:29 PM
Response to Original message
4. Only 6 recs in Education. That's.......* embarrassing*.
Same OP got 18 or something recs in glbt forum.

Maybe that explains this:

>>>Nearly two-thirds of them felt unsafe in their school, and unsupported by their teachers and their principals.>>>>


Ya think?
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bbdad Donating Member (111 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-10 01:51 AM
Response to Reply #4
6. A lot of adults (including some "progressives")
condone bullying.
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FBaggins Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 12:24 PM
Response to Reply #4
8. No it isn't.
Edited on Mon Dec-06-10 12:30 PM by FBaggins
GLBT appears to get more traffic and the topic in question fits there better than it does in Education. The rec count is about what you should expect.
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Smarmie Doofus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 03:07 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. Yes it is.
>>>>>GLBT appears to get more traffic and the topic in question fits there better than it does in Education.>>>>>>

The traffic is comparable. A slight edge to Education. GLBT was heavily trafficked in the old days. That was two or three... shall we say... "housecleanings" ago.

>>>the topic in question fits there better than it does in Education.>>>>>>

Nope. The topic is about *schools* and school culture as it effects glbts ( actually about how it effects *everyone*, but not everyone gets that.)

Naturally , there is overlap but OP is NOT about homosexuality, lesbianism, bisexuality and/or transgenderism; it is about the failure of schools to protect a subset of children that they are obligated to protect.

Perhaps it would help to read it again.
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FBaggins Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 04:18 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. What are you basing your traffic comparison on?
Edited on Mon Dec-06-10 04:36 PM by FBaggins
DU presents 80 threads to a page in my browser. For GLBT, that goes back about two weeks (for latest comments or for original posting date). You have to go back about three times as far to get comments in the same number of threads in Education.

If you take the threads that were started in the last two weeks... the ones in the Education forum have a total of 8408 views. The ones in GLBT total 24360 in the same amount of time. There were also roughly three times as many net Recs on those threads (490-180). Since 8:00am this morning there have only been comments on three threads in Education (including this one) - which isn't uncommon on a school day. There are three times as many in GLBT.

As another point of comparison, note that Recs are only possible up to 24hrs after a thread is posted. Three times as many posts were made to the parallel OP in GLBT during that period as here in Education.


We should really be "embarrassed" that there are three times as many recs in a forum that posts three times as many threads, has three times and many views, and tends to average three times as many recs?


Nope. The topic is about *schools* and school culture as it effects glbts

That's what the title implies, but it's really about the culture overall and how it (mis)treats a particular minority. It's less about education than it is about administration/security/tolerance/etc. It isn't that it isn't important, it's just that it's more relevant to the other topic area. If you started a thread with a title about lead-based paints in schools, it would still be of more interest in a Topic Forum that dealt with construction or toxicity than in a forum about education.


Lastly... it's pretty childish to put much weight behind a rec count. There's no scientific process there. Each topic area has it's own subculture and regular participants. There's no homogeneity in how they elect to recommend threads.
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Smarmie Doofus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 10:42 PM
Response to Reply #10
11. It's not about schools?
Edited on Mon Dec-06-10 10:53 PM by Smarmie Doofus
Please read it again. I repost it in it's entirety... emphasis *added* throughout.

Perhaps you should consider the possibility that you're missing the forest for the statistical trees?


WHO GETS BULLIED IN AMERICA’S SCHOOLS? (12/1)

During a three-month period in the mid 1980s, I presided at the funerals of three remarkable boys. Each of them had committed suicide. In each case the parents, as well as the rest of us, were at a loss to explain why these lads had decided to take their own lives. The one I remember most clearly was Jason (not his real name). Jason was a bright, fun-loving, perfectly delightful 14 year old. He was the bright light of his Sunday School class, and loved by those in the church who knew him—that included practically everybody. Jason was delightfully gregarious! Late one night I was called to his family’s house. His parents had found him hung from a rafter in the basement. I spent all that night at the hospital with them, until Jason was finally pronounced dead.
I had heard that Jason was the object of continual teasing at his JR HIGH SCHOOL; ridicule which grew into bullying. I subsequently learned that a few days before his death a group of the bullies had wrestled him into a large trash can, clamped on the lid and ran off laughing. We do not know what caused their hostility. Jason was a mild mannered, sweet natured, and rather unmasculine lad.

Today we might speculate about his sexual orientation. We now know that in America’s SCHOOL gay boys are overwhelmingly the butt of cruel acts perpetrated by their male **SCHOOLMATES** . 80% of GLBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender) students have reported being verbally harassed, and 49% report having been physically assaulted during the past year. (2009 National ***SCHOOL*** Climate Survey) NEARLY TWO-THIRDS OF THEM FELT UNSAFE IN THEIR SCHOOL, AND UNSUPPORTED BY THEIR TEACHERS AND THEIR PRINCIPALS. It is further known that these STUDENTS suffered from depression, anxiety and low self-esteem—all the things that may make suicide attractive. Indeed the suicide rate of these STUDENTS IS three to four times higher than that of their straight counterparts

During a three-month period in the mid 1980s, I presided at the funerals of three remarkable boys. Each of them had committed suicide. In each case the parents, as well as the rest of us, were at a loss to explain why these lads had decided to take their own lives. The one I remember most clearly was Jason (not his real name). Jason was a bright, fun-loving, perfectly delightful 14 year old. He was the bright light of his Sunday School class, and loved by those in the church who knew him—that included practically everybody. Jason was delightfully gregarious! Late one night I was called to his family’s house. His parents had found him hung from a rafter in the basement. I spent all that night at the hospital with them, until Jason was finally pronounced dead.

I had heard that Jason was the object of continual teasing at his Jr. High School; ridicule which grew into bullying. I subsequently learned that a few days before his death a group of the bullies had wrestled him into a large trash can, clamped on the lid and ran off laughing. We do not know what caused their hostility. Jason was a mild mannered, sweet natured, and rather unmasculine lad.

Today we might speculate about his sexual orientation. We now know that in America’s schools gay boys are overwhelmingly the butt of cruel acts perpetrated by their male schoolmates. 80% of GLBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender) students have reported being verbally harassed, and 49% report having been physically assaulted during the past year. (2009 NATIONAL SCHOOL CLIMATE SURVEY) Nearly two-thirds of them felt unsafe in their SCHOOL, AND UNSUPPORTED BY THEIR TEACHERS AND THEIR PRINCIPALS. It is further known that these students suffered from depression, anxiety and low self-esteem—all the things that may make suicide attractive. Indeed the suicide rate of these students is three to four times higher than that of their straight counterparts (SAVE THE SCHOOLS, as reported by The Williams Institute of the UCLA Law School.)

A quarter century ago I had neither the information nor the wisdom to realize what might have been the cause of Jason’s tragic death, or that of the other two boys. Homosexuality was not discussed anywhere in my world. As in our day, back then fully 10% of the population had a different sexual orientation, but nobody admitted it and nobody talked about it. There might have been a few lewd jokes, but little understanding of what homosexuality really entailed.

Even in these more enlightened days bullying of more fragile and defenseless boys is on the rise. Young girls are not that often physically abused, but are simply walled out of the cliques which are everywhere present. Shunning can be just as dangerous as physical assaults.

Today we are not without the resources needed to address the problem. Two months ago this subject was on everyone’s agenda, but like many important issues, it vanished from view as quickly at it had appeared.

Perhaps the first line of defense lies with parents of the bullies. It is far more serious than “boys will be boys.” TEACHERS AND SCHOOL ADMINISTRATORS NEED TO KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING UNDER THEIR NOSES, AND TO TAKE DIRECT ACTION. “THE TREVOR PROJECT” (WWW.THETREVORPROJECT.ORG ) HAS BOTH LITERATURE AND A FILM WHICH HAS BEEN SHOWN IN HUNDREDS OF JUNIOR AND SENIOR HIGH SCHOOLS. IF you suspect that a child has been bullied, for whatever reason, and is in danger of harming himself, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 800-273 8255. And be aware that Gay youngsters may be more at risk than others.

THERE MAY BE ISSUES INDIVIDUALS CAN DO LITTLE ABOUT. THIS IS ONE WHERE YOU MIGHT MAKE A LIFE AND DEATH DIFFERENCE.

Charles Bayer
,
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FBaggins Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 10:55 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. Did I *say* that it's not about schools?
Edited on Mon Dec-06-10 10:57 PM by FBaggins
Nope. But not everything that happens in a school is necessarily primarily about education... particularly things that happened in a school 25 years ago.

If a child is sexually abused in a school... it is certainly an issue that educators will be interested in... AND it certainly relates tangentially to education (as does this). But the primary topic (from a discussion forum standpoint) is sexual abuse and/or law/crime/punishment. If you cross-post an article about a highschool football team here and in Sports... don't be shocked to get more traffic in Sports.

So once again... the topic fits GLBT better than Education AND you could expect more eyes to see it there in the initial 24 hours that it was posted. It is therefore no surprise that you would find more recs in that initial posting period in the GLBT forum than the Education forum.

Frankly... the implication that you would expect to find fewer recs here because education professionals are anti-gay bigots... is both ignorant and insulting. Far more so than failing to rec a minor post.
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Smarmie Doofus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-07-10 07:29 AM
Response to Reply #12
13. So it IS about schools..... and what goes on in and around them...
... but it's NOT about *education*?


>>>>Frankly... the implication that you would expect to find fewer recs here because education professionals are anti-gay bigots... is both ignorant and insulting. Far more so than failing to rec a minor post.>>>

If the shoe doesn't fit, don't feel insulted.

Re. the comparative recs: my statistical dept. is out at the dry-cleaners. In the meantime, Your Werner Von Braun-ish insistence that " it's not my ( OK : "OUR") department" is curious and a bit scary.

If I were a glbt kid in a HS at which you taught or administered , I'm thinking I'd probably NOT feel comfortable bringing an harassment issue to your attention.

I dunno why... I just wouldn't.
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