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so... Those LGBTers in rural areas... how do you cope?

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w8liftinglady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-31-11 07:11 PM
Original message
so... Those LGBTers in rural areas... how do you cope?
I know I've asked this before. I'm melencholy....how do you cope in an unfriendly area? I don't expect an answer- just to vent...

You guys are awesome!
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dsc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-31-11 07:15 PM
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1. whatever you do don't do what I did when I lived in MS
I drank like a bunch of sailors. Seriously, the internet is a great thing and roadtrips to cities.
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provis99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-31-11 07:25 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Oxford, Mississippi was surprisingly tolerant.
I remember one of the pub by Square Books even had GLBT nights on Wednesdays.

Of course, it helps that this being Mississippi, your average gay person probably had a gun.
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dsc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-31-11 07:27 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. I was in the delta
yes Oxford was very nice.
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w8liftinglady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-31-11 07:32 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. LOL...you are kind of describing me tonight. It's a tough one!
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JackBeck Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-31-11 08:09 PM
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5. I just came across this documentary this afternoon that addresses
Edited on Wed Aug-31-11 08:09 PM by JackBeck
how some people cope with being LGBT and living in rural areas.

"Out in the Silence"

http://wpsu.org/outinthesilence
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closeupready Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-01-11 08:56 AM
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6. I'm from the rural Midwest originally.
I didn't cope well, so I can't answer, but I know ever since I was very young, I always knew that I would one day move far away from there, either to California or New York, as back then, those were really the only two states widely known to have large, out gay populations.

I'm so glad I made the transition, and would never, ever, ever, ever go back.
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Zorra Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-01-11 11:38 AM
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7. A thick skin, and I guess I
get some (probably very unhealthy) jollies by pissing off RW conservatives.

If simply being who I am pisses them off because they hate me without even knowing me, that's their choice and their problem, although I'm sure most of them would make serious problems for me and all of us if they could.

I wish it was not this way; I don't really want to add more fuel to a diseased mind and add to a mentally ill persons problems, but what can I do? I can't change to accommodate their insanity. I try to have compassion for them and understanding, and can sometimes feel pity for them in the face of their demented hatred. I tell myself, they are sick, and they can't help themselves, their consciousness has repeatedly been poisoned since birth.

But I am only human, and sometimes cannot bring myself to get some satisfaction in pissing off someone that is exhibiting the characteristics of being a bigoted asshole.

So far no one has ever assaulted me physically; I smile at them beatifically when they verbally abuse me or look at me with that exaggerated look of disgust that RW conservatives get when encountering something that frightens them because it is different and/or because they are jealous because they can't express their deeply closeted LGBT feelings and desires.

We also have some LGBT meetups in the area, and I will sometimes drive 200+ miles back and forth total to mingle with a broader LGBT population. Communicating through the internet with friends helps also.

But yeah, there are those lonely days when I'm not strong enough to cope as well, also. I just try to stay positive, and channel anger, frustration, and sadness into something constructive, and that often gets me through the bad day to a better next day.

This is an incomplete nutshell.

Thank you for bringing up this sensitive subject that I believe very important for us to hash out.
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foreigncorrespondent Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-02-11 10:07 AM
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8. I just tell them...
... to fuck off!

Everyone is this small town knows I am a lesbian, I don't hide. I have had some windows smashed in our home, my car has been egged, and has also had brake fluid poured over it. We had one of our cats poisoned a couple of years ago, thankfully we got her to the vet on time. I have been bashed, and through everything they have dished out, they haven't won, because I am still here, and not planning on moving back to the city any time soon.
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