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The education of a middle aged man from central Alabama.

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Amimnoch Donating Member (377 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 05:23 AM
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The education of a middle aged man from central Alabama.
For some background,I've been living in Macae, Rio De Janeiro, Brazil for a bit over a year and a half now (work related). Before I moved down here, my company had no policy recognizing employees in same sex relationships. When my manager asked me to move down here, I told him that I loved the idea, but the only way I would is if the company extended full benefits to my partner, and moved him down here with me. Management wanted me down here really bad, so they changed company policy to include same sex relationships. (very long story short version).

Anyway, since I've been down here, the vast majority of people i work for, with, and work for me have become very inclusive of my partner and myself. There is one guy, a 38 year old man from Alabama who, while never obnoxious, or rude, has stated numerous times that he does believe marriage should be between one man and one woman. He and his wife live in the same mid-rise condo building that my partner and I live in. Now, before you hate him too much, while he does feel that way, he and his wife have had numerous dinners with my partner and I, and we've had dinners with him and his wife.

This past July, my partner and I celebrated our 10th anniversary together. To celebrate, I rented out a large B&B in Rio that we go to regularly on weekend retreats. When I passed out the announcements, Alabama made a comment (half-jokingly) that it wasn't really an anniversary, but he'd be happy to celebrate with us... Well, this rubbed me the wrong way. Soooo, rather than try to have another failed philosophical discussion with him about it, I decided to put him in our shoes for a little bit. So, I made arrangements with the B&B, and many of my core friends to show him what it's like.

When he and his wife arrived in Rio, and went to check into the B&B, they found out that they had separate rooms assigned for each other.. When they tried to put themselves into the same room because they are married, Anderson (the owner) told them "I'm sorry, but we don't recognize heterosexual marriages here, you will have to stay in separate rooms". This was just the beginning.. all weekend long my friends, and co-workers would only introduce him and wife as "friends". Like "this is ____ and his special friend ______" If he'd try to clarify that she was his wife, they would put on faces of disgust, end the conversation, and walk away from them hurriedly.

Monday morning at the office he told me that was a fucked up thing that I did to him and his wife, but he does have a much better understanding of what my partner and I go through. Same sex marriage is still against his religious belief, but he has come around to believe that it should be legalized now, and that discrimination like what he faced all weekend is wrong.

As a side note, we were discussing it in the office this past friday afternoon, and laughing about it, and I realized I'd never shared it with you guys who would probably appreciate it.
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WillParkinson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 06:01 AM
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1. Sweet story!
Thank you so much for sharing and also for educating people in a gentle way.
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LuvNewcastle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 06:07 AM
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2. Some people only learn the hard way.
Good job.:thumbsup:
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xchrom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 06:42 AM
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3. Nice. Nt
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Ilsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 07:00 AM
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4. Fabulous! I can see you went to a lot of effort, but you converted him! nt
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reggie the dog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-25-11 08:01 AM
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5. great
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