If I am attracted to men, but

[madinmaryland]

i am married, what does that make me. i am impressed by the bods of some men but not others. i am also turned on by many women too. what do i do? advise me please

[Up2Late]

1. Start working out

get your ass in shape, you just doubled your chances for a date on Friday night.:evilgrin:

[madinmaryland]

11. well, i'm

42, and it is 3:42am. its already saturday, so my ass doesnt really matter.

Does it?

[Spinzonner]

2. A pathetic dweeb who tries to have a sex fantasy on the web

[madinmaryland]

3. yada, yada, f'n yada

[Fovea]

4. You might be bisexual

one of those lucky fellows who enjoys rejection from both genders equally!

Are you 'typie' with both men and women?

[madinmaryland]

5. well

i am getting rejected both ways. i try not to.

[w13rd0]

6. talk to your wife about it

...n/t

[Shredr]

7. Well, for one thing, you're married

So, anything you'd do with another man or a woman would be cheating. Unfortunately, we still live in a homophobic society. It's getting better. Slowly. But a lot of gay men fear a loss of masculinity, so they suppress their feelings and marry woman (many of them then become leaders of the "church" and radical Right Wing organiziation, but I digress).

Honestly, if you're not bullshiting, the best thing you can do is talk to a sympathetic therapist. Then, before you do anything else, talk to your wife.

[Meldread]

8. Well I guess since you're asking...

I guess since you're asking that would qualify you as "Questioning".

You are most likely bi-sexual. Most people are bi-sexual to one degree or another -- sexuality isn't static as some would like to believe. It operates on a slider scale. You might be attracted to only a "certain type of man", whereas others might not be attractive to you. The same for women. Not every woman you see makes you go "Wow!" and you instantly feel an attraction to them. It might be the same for men but to a smaller (or perhaps even larger) degree.

Most bi-sexual people don't have a 50/50 attraction. There are more bi-sexual people out there than "completely" straight and gay people combine.

For example I would "technically" classify as a bi-sexual. I'm 98% attracted to men, but if Angelina Jolie showed up at my door step I wouldn't think twice. I just find extremely strong, beautiful, intelligent and successful women very attractive. Sexually speaking I'm blind to every other type of woman. Oddly enough I don't find the same type of man attractive -- intelligent, warm and loving are what I find attractive in a male. I am not overly attracted to a man who is "extremely strong", because I feel (and it might sound silly but its true) that I am in competition with him rather than a partnership.

As you can see from me, sexuality is a strange, weird and funny thing. I wouldn't think about leaving your wife to "explore" just because you are likely attracted to men. That would be "wrong". I wouldn't suggest cheating on her to "find out" either. Just accept it as part of who you are and move on, and take comfort that you are most likely living in the majority.

[madinmaryland]

9. thank you

we are confortable together. i do have interests in other men, which is why i brought it up here. i don't want to cheat but "curiosity" does kill the cat.

[Meldread]

15. Yes, I do understand.

Curiosity does often kill the cat. The wondering of "what it's like" and the "would I like it?" (The sex part of a gay relationship, at least. Gay relationships are just as complex and insane as heterosexual relationships... in most cases they come with a bit of extra baggage.)

It's perfectly natural to wonder and be curious about those things. You just have to accept it as part of who you are -- realize that you are a complex person -- and then treat it as you would an attraction to a female. The temptation is always there, just as it is for everyone else, but if you are committed to your vows then you have to place those above your more primal feelings. (It's what separates us from wild animals -- our ability to control our more primal instincts... well most of the time, at least! :evilgrin: )

[madinmaryland]

16. You are right in many respects

And yes, curiosity does kill the cat.

I have been there, (15 years ago. . ., before i was married) and have wanted to feel the love again. Just the way it is.

[Devlzown]

10. SGWM looking for same

I am 6'2", swimmer's body, 9". No smoking, no drugs, must be CLEAN. No fats no fems. Sarcasm: off

[madinmaryland]

12. Not quite your

specifications. I'm 5'9"

[Devlzown]

13. Oh, you're BAD!

[madinmaryland]

14. thx!

[xchrom]

17. my fav type to have affairs with!

they always have to go home.:)
while there is only one ultimate destination for every one -- the grave -- the road has many twists and turns on the way there.
be smart, be sensitive and enjoy your self while you are here.