When people die from cancer...

[W_HAMILTON]

With the news of Dana Reeve passing this morning, this made me wonder about this again.

When someone dies from cancer, how is it? I'm sure it is painful, but does the person see it coming? Are they awake and lucid, then suddenly feel death approaching? Or do they just fall asleep and never wake up again?

And do the loved ones usually see that death is soon, or is it more sudden? I hadn't heard anything bad about Dana Reeve and her fight with cancer, then boom, she's dead this morning.

It just seems like an awful way to die.

[WCGreen]

1. There is a lot of pain until the end... Then they pump the

pain killers in.....

And they fall asleep....

And not wake up....

The system slowly shuts down....

At least that is the way it was in my experience with the disease....

[BOSSHOG]

2. My father

had Alzheimer's but his cause of death was Prostate Cancer. We brought him home the last month of his life. He was taking a lot of pain killers. He slept most of the time and in the last week or so he (according to the Doctor) went into a coma and never again awakened. His death seemed rather peaceful but I know he suffered greatly during his last year.

[Cobalt Violet]

3. It can vary widely.

It depends on the location of the cancer. Sometime they die because of the complications of the location. I know that's the case with lung cancer. When lung cancer spreads to the bones and brain it is extremely painful. Many people who have it don't live long enough for the cancer to spread to that point.

[Lerkfish]

4. not sure why you want to know, but like everything else, it depends

it depends on the type of cancer, how it has ravaged the body and individual stamina.

but I don't get the reason for asking? If you haven't been through it, good for you. I have lost my mother and other loved ones to cancer, and other relatives to various other causes. No matter how it transpires, its never easy for the those left behind.

[no_hypocrisy]

5. My mother died of lung cancer. She didn't make it in time to go home to

die with hospice.

She was in the hospital where she gave birth to my sister and brother, in relative comfort.

She didn't know that the tumor had gone to her kidneys and was told that b/c she had a urinary tract infection, she needed to have a catheter. In order to avoid the agonizing pain of death by cancer, her doctor and my father arranged for her to have mega-narcotics (among other drugs) via IV and a DNR form was signed and posted. While I believe she knew she was fading fast, it seemed that she was focused more on having her faculties taken away like her ability to stay awake and to talk.

I can tell you as I was the only one with her when she passed that it was peaceful. She was literally sleeping even though I knew it was a drug-induced coma. No tortured breathing or a facial mask of pain. I was grateful for that much.

So to address the original theme of this post, it depends how you die of cancer: the type of cancer, where it is, the stage, the treatment, and the drugs given.

[CTyankee]

6. My good friend died of lung cancer

It was 18 months from diagnosis to death. She had surgery to remove a lobe of her lung. The surgery was horrible. She was a strong woman but really suffered. Treatment was also horrible. She went into a brief remission then wham, back came the cancer with a vengeance. She refused further treatment and was taken to Hospice. At first, when I visited her she was lucid and eating. Then she got weaker and less able to speak. She was heavily sedated and finally, after a few weeks, drifted away. I do not wish this death on anyone.

[moobu2]

7. My sister

was awake until the moment she died, though they had given her enough pain meds (morphine) to knock out an elephant. She asked for her priest a few minutes before she died and was fully aware and lucid until her last breath.

Her cancer started in her breasts and metastasized to her bones and brain and finally her liver.
This was 20 years ago and she was 42 years old.

[Nordmadr]

8. Warning, some graphic detail: My wife's father passed away 5 years ago

from cancer in his neck. It was literally eating a hole in the side of his neck. He was on lots of morphine. Just a week before he died, it actually ate into a vessel in his neck causing him to bleed out through the side of his neck. It was 2 days after Christmas. That was a rough night, and the last one he was able to spend at home. He was scared. My wife and I were just dating at the time, and I spent the night cleaning up and trying to shelter her from it after we returned from the hospital.

He fought right up until then, but I think when he realized he was not coming home again, he just gave up. It was terrible. His system jsut shut down, and he was heavily drugged most of the time after that. He was 60 years old. Her mother had died 4 years before that(before I knew my wife), cancer as well. She was 56.

Olafr

[Warpy]

9. I've seen a lot of death

and one thing I've noticed is that lucid people start to turn pain medication down when they're within hours of death. If they're on a constant dose, they stop asking for more for breakthrough pain.

As death approaches, you can see people letting go of everything in life. This might apply to the sensations their bodies are having as well as the nagging worries about the bills piling up or the people left behind.

Getting to the point of death is always awful in one way or another. Our bodies want to cling to life for as long as they can. Something else takes over when we're nearly there, though. I am convinced of that.

[shrike]

10. I agree

We were with my dad on the last day of his life, and one of the things we had to ask him to do was let go. We phoned his former girlfriend, with whom he was still friendly, and she rushed to his bedside. I remember her clutching his hand, exhorting him to relax. One of his best friends also came, and the priest who gave him the last rights was an old friend from years back. The priest, who is a chaplain at a major hospital, told me later it was one of the hardest things he's ever done.
Years earlier I remember him telling us how much he hated the thought of dying, because he would have to leave us all. It was indeed such a struggle; every part of him wanted to hang on. Funny, that he waited to go when we had all left the room; the hospice nurse told me that in her experience it was not uncommon.

[shrike]

11. The most peaceful death I've ever seen belonged to my SIL

Who was a wonderful woman. If anyone deserved such a passing she did.
A criminally-negligent doctor had missed the fact she had colon cancer until it was too late. She was undergoing chemo, though, in hopes of gaining a few more years. One morning she got up, went into the kitchen to fix breakfast, felt a little weak, went into the living room to sit down, relaxed in her favorite chair and died. It was that fast. Turned out she had a blood clot in her lung, side effect sometimes from chemo.

[RebelOne]

12. My sister died of kidney cancer.

Toward the end she was very heavily sedated, so she wasn't feeling any pain. Finally, her daughters had the life support turned off and she went peacefully.

And my mother died of lung cancer. She was also on morphine, so she wasn't feeling anything. She just died in her sleep.