Raising kids to end racism

[lightningandsnow]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/22608585#22608585

A story, from the today show, about a school board with an anti-racism program.

I'm so glad they're teaching this...hearing about people doing things like this lets me regain a bit of faith in humanity.

[ordinaryaveragegirl]

1. Race isn't even an issue for my kids, thankfully...

They've been raised to see beyond race, just as I was. I have friends of various backgrounds, as do my kids. I try to open them up to as many different traditions, cultures, and customs as possible, so that it gives them a broader perspective of the world we live in. Openness and understanding are the keys to raising children to become well-rounded, respectful adults, IMHO.

[RavensChick]

2. Amen!

I was raised the same way, yet I live in one of the most diverse cities in the nation! You're so right about openness, and I ernestly hope that children are given the chance to not only understand other cultures but embrace them and appreciate the fact that we may be different on the outside, but inside we share the same ideals, goals, and objectives no matter where life takes us. I'm only sorry many don't share the same values because of the ignorance that's still out there. Someday we'll finally be united on one accord, but until then we must let children share in other cultures and traditions, one child at a time.

[AccessGranted]

9. Same Here

My parents raised us to be very open about race and I raised my sons the same way.

[Brewman_Jax]

3. At least they acknowledge racism

as a social/societal problem, not simply an individual problem. With that in mind, this program can really be effective.

[ninety lives]

4. Teach your children VALUES, not just about "cultures"

It's important to teach your children VALUES - to reject the values of
cruelty, pettiness, mocking and bullying. When children are rewarded
for seeking or achieving dominance over others, they are more likely
to practice bigotry.

Anti-racism programs are important, but sometimes your school won't
have them. Some schools don't do enough to encourage respect and
civility and discourage violence.

If you teach your child compassion and respect for others,
they'll be a tolerant person even if everyone in their hometown is
the same color.

That said, all children should learn about the civil rights movement
and the Holocaust, etc. It's shocking how many children don't.

[mysteryman2]

5. Hi

Children lean from other people. One of the pioneers of this research is Bandura. He calls his studies social learning. It's main teaching is children learn from viewing their enviroment. There is more but its to long to get into. Thats a short run down.

It can even have criminal elements criminologists say. You know the kids who learn about gangs from family members and join them. A theif teaches a child how to steal a car.

Any way if you want to read about the theory it is called social learning theory by Bandura.

[noamnety]

6. My head's going to explode

I'm in a teacher education course here, and one of the fellow teachers is explaining that we should be careful not to have any racial bias in the classroom - and the safest way to ensure this is to "select something that stayed away from ethnicity" and then she goes on to recommend sticking to the classics (and she lists examples of books about all white people).

No, really, my head IS going to explode. I can feel it.

[Not Sure]

7. My girls are 4 and 5, and I've never heard anything

resembling racism from either one, which is somewhat surprising, considering my family is all fair skinned and we live in north Texas. I grew up here and I was always aware of the racism that surrounded me, but thanks to my parents, I was taught it was wrong from the beginning.

In some ways, I think it's easier to teach my girls about people being treated differently based on their appearance. That's somewhere short of racism, but it's the foundation that we can build awareness on. The main reason I find it easy to teach them is that they have very fair skin and red hair. They are very different from most other kids in our neighborhood and the other kids (and moms and dads and grandparents) don't hesitate to point them out. Most of the time it's to tell them how pretty their hair is, but on more than a few occasions it's been a derogatory comment, and those often come from the older generation.

I use these times as examples of being treated unfairly for the way a person looks and they respond to these teachings. I do my best to keep a cool head - which is extremely difficult at these times given some of the ravings of certain family members I experienced as a child and young adult - but I also have an issue with violence, so remembering I'm an example of both how my daughters should behave and what behavior they'll seek in men as they mature (plus, my wife not-so-subtly reminds me) all dovetails to keep my anger in check.

Our intent is to bring the girls up as "race-neutral." I am fond of saying that there is only one race: the human race. It's rather elementary, but then again, it's age-appropriate for my girls. And this approach came to me in a conversation with an older co-worker, who was the kind of greatest generation racist that looks both ways before uttering the N word. Racist to the core despite his good behavior. I realized I could never change his mind, and the potential was even pretty bleak among people my age. But the one generation they couldn't get to would be my children.

So far, this works. My wife and I have always had friends whose ancestry crosses and blends all continents. Our girls have also formed friendships with other children regardless of their skin color or clothing. Honestly, I didn't expect it to be this easy. Granted, the girls aren't the same age as the kids in the news story linked in the OP, so the biases they see are more about who has what or who gets some particular favoritism in school. However, since I've been thinking about this and sussing it out in my head for years - before they were conceived, actually - I've tried to map out a dialogue for discussion of this issue when they discover real racism in others. Examples of discrimination, be it racism, sexism, religious intolerance, etc., are there in the front of my mind and I am ready to teach my girls the fallacy of each. Years ago I vowed to kill the racism virus in my children before it takes hold. That is part of my mission as a parent and my covenant with my fellow humans.

I don't know if my approach is more or less valid or effective than anyone else's, but at the heart of it is my conviction to heal the wounds of generations beginning with the generations in my home.

[AccessGranted]

8. Racial Harmony In Motion

The other day my son asked me if he could have a few friends from school over to play Guitar Hero. We're African-American. He's 15. His friends were from Pakistan, India, Mexico and the Dominican Republic. One was Interracial (Half Black and Half Puerto Rican), another was white and others were African-American. Religions were Muslim, Catholic, Buddhist, Jewish and Seventh Day Adventist and I am agnostic and my son is an atheist by his own choice. They were all happy together. Nobody cared about what anybody else was. They were just a bunch of friends happy together. Nothing else mattered. Beautiful!

[Name removed]

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