I'm close to 60, and I find myself thinking about the past more than I'm comfortable with.

[raccoon]

Sometimes about people I used to know who I had differences with, sometimes pleasant memories of my parents when I was a younger adult, and wishing I had them back.

I think one reason for this is I don't have much going on in my life right now.

Anybody else experience this?

[lamp_shade]

1. I'm a little older than you but I shock myself sometimes when I remember names that I

have no business remembering. Same thing with story characters, poems, etc. It's amazing. Ask me what I had for breakfast today though and I have to stop and think hard.

[The River]

2. Just Over 60

and I've left the past behind. I'm just months from a
pension and retirement. I'm too busy planning to have some
fun with what time is left.

[dixiegrrrrl]

3. "more than I am confortable with"

is an important statement.

Here and now is pretty anxiety producing for a lot of us, I know that.

Do you have any anxiety, insomnia, other symptoms?

[raccoon]

6. Not those others that you mentioned. I'm surprised to see you here.

:hi:

[dixiegrrrrl]

13. Why surprised? I am ancient.

but busy, often do not have chance to wander thru many forums.
but..ya never know....

Actually, upon further reflection, you ask a good question abut re-visiting the past.
I shall ponder it further.

[SharonAnn]

4. I, too, am thinking about the past. When young people with educations and talent could get

jobs that would lead to a career. Jobs that had benefits, like health care insurance, vacations, pensions.

As it is, my grandson, unable to find anything but a minimum wage job with no benefits, had to join the army to get these for himself and his new wife. He was deployed to Afghanistan a month ago. Let's hope he survives it and that there is a better future for him when he returns.

He is a well educated and highly skilled mechanic, primarily on diesel engines. He is a natural born responsible man and a leader.

It's hard to believe that, compared to when I started my career in the late 1960's, that there is little opportunity for someone of that demonstrated talent, skill, and work ethic.

Yes, I find myself thinking of the past and what would've been available to him in those days.

[nimvg]

7. I'm Forty Four...

...and I find myself asking the same questions.

We have to do something about trade policy. If we had spent half the time we're spending on a health care bill (that's ultimately never going to pass anyhow) on trade issues, our economy would be in better shape and we'd have made some inroads toward restoring what so many of us know damn well we had forty years ago.

Part of the reason things look so bad in the Rust Belt is because we just don't make anything anymore...but another part of it has to do with allowing that region's physical infrastructure and underlying economic base to rot since the sixties. Dallas and Austin have gorgeous new freeways next to brand new schools, churches, malls and office buildings. It's a tailor made environment for stealing away jobs from the north and that's precisely what's been going on since 1970. We didn't want to leave Akron after college but ultimately someone stepped up with two plane tickets to Texas and that was it. Fifteen years later, we're in northern California looking back at all the people we knew from high school and college who didn't leave and are back there struggling.

[SPedigrees]

9. Count this as one of my biggest regrets.

The fact that anyone who worked hard back in the 1960s could make a good living and enjoy a comfortable lifestyle. One could support oneself even at a minimum wage job, and back in the day the minimum wage went up at regular intervals. Employers used to try to woe potential new employees by offering benefits. I feel very sorry that young people today do not have the richness of life and diverse opportunity that we enjoyed.

[RKP5637]

29. It's very very sad. They have nothing like we had. And we had job security. Unless

you really screwed up, you kept your Job if doing good work.

[RKP5637]

28. It's all changed and not in a good way at all. I was lucky, I got into computers

in the beginning, ground floor, and road it all the way up. Today, I have no idea what I would do starting out. When I was young the corporation was your friend and mentor, I worked for my corporations about ten years at a time, each. Long dedicated employment was valued. Today, it is all different.

[asjr]

5. I can remember the names of my 3 best

girlfriends in 5th grade in 1943 and haven't seen them since. But I fool my children with "Oh, a few days ago" when they ask if I did something I was supposed to do but don't remember. I think dwelling on the past is a natural occuring thing as we get older.

[SPedigrees]

8. I'll be 60 in a few weeks and yes I reminisce about the past.

I think it is because getting old and losing persons and places and a way of life, as well as the realization that many doors of opportunity have closed to us, drops a barrier between our present and our past. Thus we are more inclined to look through this window barrier into a past which is no longer accessible to us, except in memory.

[RKP5637]

30. +1, n/t

[elocs]

10. At 58 I've learned that life is about choices and consequences, and regrets

and how to live with them.

I like this quote by French writer Marcel Pagnol: “The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be”.

The older we get, the more life experiences we accumulate, both good and bad. The good memories make us smile while the bad is clutter that drags us down. Life moves on and we either move with it, move on, or get snagged by the past and our regrets.

[raccoon]

14. Regret used to eat me alive. I bitterly regretted leaving a job I had once.

I was working with a bunch of turkey rednecks, but boy the benefits were better than anything I've had ever since.

Things have gotten a better for me since then so I don't regret it much these days, but boy, when you can look back and think, If I'd done/hadn't done such-and-such I'd be SO much better off today....

[elocs]

15. Yep, it took me many years to get over quitting a job.

After I graduated college in 1975 I ended up working for my city's Park Department as a laborer. It was actually a job I liked, getting to do different things and working outside. I even got to work in the zoo on the zookeeper's days off and that was a job I loved. Eventually I got on full time and it was a good paying union job with good benefits.

The zookeeper was paranoid that I was after his job and he harassed me until I decided to quit and since I had a college degree I figured I could get another good job. I never really did and the kick in the pants is that the zookeeper had to retire a few years later. Bidding for the job was by seniority and nobody above me would have wanted it so had I stayed I would have become the zookeeper. Today the small city zoo has grown into being an Eco Park and I would have been a part of the whole thing.

I kicked myself for years for quitting that job. I still can't bring myself to go to that park.

[joe black]

11. Boy oh boy!

Me too, I'm 60+ and get pretty sad thinking of days past when my wife and I were young, raising a family, our first home, etc. Last month our beloved dog Cookie died and that triggered more memories of when he'd sit on the hill waiting for me to come home from work to greet me and run around the house three times in complete joy! The dog could run at 35 mph,I clocked him once. In his later years arthritis set in but he still would continue on, loyal to the end. He died alone in the house and I feel so damn bad about that. I hope he's waiting for me when I pass I miss him so much.

[tango-tee]

23. Dear joe black, Cookie will be waiting, without a doubt .

And welcome to DU!

[Nancy Ruth]

12. Aging....

I just turned 68, and I have the same experience. I can't say that I am enjoying this stage of life.

[raccoon]

20. I'd have to say I'm happier than I have been most of my life.

One reason for this is that for much of my life, I suffered from clinical depression. I have been on meds for that for years now, and it has really helped me.

Another things, I believe I'm more accepting of things I can't change.

On the down side, health issues that I used to didn't have to deal with.

[Sal Minella]

16. This is mentioned so often, I wonder if it's evolved as a form of passing

acquired wisdom on to the younger members of the species? (I mean, provided they ask us, which most of them don't, but I have a couple of young friends who actually discuss life issues with me).

[applegrove]

17. Oh yes. Anytime there is a life change (and I've been through many) you can go

back and find yourself deep into a time of your life that is significant to you for some reason. I can walk through memories from when I was in my 20s right now. There is a specific reason why that time in my life is on my mind right now.

[2Design]

18. Choices not taken and decisions made and people not chosen

Sometimes too much and it has me frozen in the past and not moving forward. Feeling I am in survival mode and if I got sick, that is it, it is over. No coverage. More outcome than income. As soon as it gets better, it drastically gets reduced. Keep feeling like I am pushing molasses up hill.

This whole health care thing is depressing since I don't qualify for anything now.

See how young people and others don't understand how unions got them the benefits they do have of five day work weeks and holidays and vacations and as the unions all get busted by corporations with the teacher union being attacked aggressively.

Recently made contact with someone from 30 years ago who was very interested in me at that time and foolishly feel I did not make the practical decision and let it go. Kind to me.

Not being as fit as I was or able to ski and being overweight.

Not believing in myself

Yes too much time in the past because of being in survival mode for the last twenty years because of choices made.

Realizing so many have government jobs and benefits and they are against anyone else having that. Wish I had taken a steady government job where I would have health care after working there only five years like some states have.

Well that is enough rambling

[raccoon]

19. I can relate to what you said about health care. I have an individual policy that I guess

is better than nothing. High deductible, doesn't cover anything but catastrophes, really. It really pisses me off that I can't get Medicare.

"Not being as fit as I was or able to ski and being overweight."

Same here. For the past year I've been dealing with plantar fasciitis. And I love to walk.

I wish I had a full-time job with benefits. I haven't had benefits since 1993, and it is unlikely that I ever will again.

[2Design]

21. last had benefits in 1997 - I orignally tried to have basic

insurance but realized if I got sick, I couldn't work or pay the premiums so at the time I would need it, I would be dropped. I will be one of the one Grayson says, rethugs want you to die quickly. Worse case would be to get arrested and put in jail to get health care - hospitals don't accept you if you can't pay - not sure what will happen - had some minor things that I would normally go to a doctor for - but just not taking care of - I know a number of people who have cancer and thought, they are lucky to have insurance to help, if something like that happened then - that's it

[radical noodle]

22. Heh!

I'm 62 and even though I'm busy all the time, I find myself doing that... oh, and singing old songs I've not thought of in a million years. Too bad they don't have an "old lady" smilie.

:crazy:

[old mark]

24. I went through a period of this when I retired at 59. I think it's natural to

look back and find things in ourselves we are not happy with. I know there are people who are not able to do this, but I think it is normal for most of us.
eventually, I just came to the conclusion that the past is past, and I want to have my time for myself now, not to live in what might have been had things been different - that is a never ending trip, and a total waste of time and effort.

We all have things we regret or feel we could have done better with, but there is no do-over. Accept what you can not change, because you really can not change it. enjoy your present, don't fret over the past.

Just my 2 cents, and worth every penny.

mark

[RKP5637]

31. That's good advice and same that my dr. told me when I discussed it with her one day.

You can sit there worrying about the past and what might happen next, but you will stop living your life, it's better to move on forward. I took her advice and moved on forward.

[pscot]

25. We do have some control

over this kind of thing. Meditation can help you to silence that voice that keeps talking to you. Computer gaming lets you live vicariously. Reading and music are effective. Memorize poetry, from tin-pan-alley to Snorri Sturlsson and recite at will. If all else fails you can always leave the TV on 24/7. It's designed to eradicate thought entirely.

[Little Star]

26. I actually appreciate thinking back sometimes.

The good, the bad and the ugly! I've come a long way baby! I've had a lot of learning moments and I am thankful for those, now that they are over. I've also lived, loved and enjoyed a whole hell of a lot too! I don't want to go back, but I do like reflecting sometimes.

Like the other day, I was talking to my sister about my first (4th grade)love. I can still conjure up those feelings and the music (Cathy's Clown was my song for us when I became a young scorned teen and still crazy about him). Wonder how he is? Wonder what he did with his life. Hope it was all good!

FYI: I wouldn't trade one minute of my life. That life led me to my wonderful husband, 4 daughters and 5 grandchildren.

Another FYI: I still have a lot to learn and experience and don't want to miss a single minute of it.

GO Senior Citizens!!!!!!!!!

I love this OP! Thanks!

[RKP5637]

27. I find myself doing the same. I have more than enough to do, but I seem

to be repeating the past in my mind. I'm over 60 now. Maybe it's just part of aging... I have no idea, but was pleased to see someone else was doing/wondering the same. It's kind of like a movie playing in the background.

[raccoon]

33. Me too! "was pleased to see someone else was doing/wondering the same"

Glad to hear it. :hug: :toast:

[dipsydoodle]

32. Can you remember the days

when you didn't end a sentence with a prepostition ?

Only pulling your leg. Maybe find something new to occupy your time - dance or play the banjo whatever.

:hi:

ps I'm 66 and my wife died when we were both 45.