"Deadbeat & Abusive Fathers Use Federal Funds for Their Custody Battles"

[bloom]

As seen on http://redstatefeminist.blogspot.com/

Deadbeat & Abusive Fathers Use Federal Funds for Their Custody Battles

The Washington Times
Forum: The other side of fathers' rights controversy
Published April 23, 2006

The National Alliance for Family Court Justice has lobbied against deadbeat and abusive fathers for many years and for reasons including their fraudulent use of federal Department of Health and Human Services fatherhood programs for funding their custody litigation.

Children of our group members were featured in the PBS documentary "Breaking The Silence: Children's Stories," cited by Carey Roberts in "M.O.M. squad capers" (Forum, April 16) The only negative responses received by PBS were from fathers rights activists, while PBS also received many supporting comments from psychological and health professionals concerned about the harm done to children by these men.

Just about everything the fathers' rights activist say and do is a self-serving sham. They talk about shared parenting but practice sole custody for fathers and near-termination of maternal contact and rights with their children. Mothers are forced into supervised visitation on frivolous grounds of "interfering" with the father's relationship with the children.

They falsely complain about widespread court favoritism toward mothers but conceal the fact most of their activists have sole or joint custody and receive child support instead paying support. On a local radio program several years ago, area fathers made these complaints about courts biases against fathers -- but all these men claimed to be one of the lucky ones who got sole custody....

On edit - other links see:

http://nafcj.org/

[robbedvoter]

1. Is this coming from the Moonie Times? Nuff said.

[bloom]

2. Are they esp. pro-feminist

and/or into exposing Abusive Fathers who Use Federal Funds?


That would be news to me.

[Warpy]

3. Me, too

I've run up against these Men's Rights groups and yes, their idea of shared custody is sole custody.

Just once, I'd love to see a men's advocacy group that was willing to share SOMETHING.

For the record, I know women who have lost children to fathers who fought for them. It has worked out well, much better than for many who got sole custody of their children. Fathers with custody can't walk away from their kids; fathers without custody can and do. Mom will always be Mom.

[bloom]

4. I knew this one family

where the father had custody during the parents separation and it was a disaster.

But then he was textbook case narcissist.

I was noticing this recently:

"Appendix - Custody and Visitation

A parent diagnosed with full-fledged Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) should be denied custody and be granted only restricted rights of visitation under supervision.

Narcissists accord the same treatment to children and adults. They regard both as sources of narcissistic supply, mere instruments of gratification - idealize them at first and then devalue them in favour of alternative, safer and more subservient, sources. Such treatment is traumatic and can have long-lasting emotional effects.

The narcissist's inability to acknowledge and abide by the personal boundaries set by others puts the child at heightened risk of abuse - verbal, emotional, physical, and, often, sexual. His possessiveness and panoply of indiscriminate negative emotions - transformations of aggression, such as rage and envy - hinder his ability to act as a "good enough" parent. His propensities for reckless behaviour, substance abuse, and sexual deviance endanger the child's welfare, or even his or her life."

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq22.html


The trouble is - that often - like this guy - they are very good at deception. Of course he wasn't diagnosed - but he fits the description perfectly. And he did whatever he could to get the children to hate their mother - at least until he decided he wanted her back to do the work of raising the children. He even wanted her to go be their maid while he had a girlfriend.

Not that all fathers are narcissists, of course. But I don't think that most father's would be so manipulative and demanding of custody, either.

[Solo_in_MD]

5. Being a deadbeat/abusive parent is not limited to any gender

There are horror stories on both sides and the courts don't seem to be able to deal with the fringe cases (on either side).

At this point I am for genetically confirmed paternity for all children (regardless of the status of the mother) and serious penalties for clearly fraudulent claims of abuse. Note that all of the above are gender neutral.

I agree with other posters about anything in the WashTimes.



edited for grammer

[Infomaniac]

7. From my own experience I have to agree

There are definitely horror stories on both sides. The courts have gotten somewhat better at recognizing and dealing with the issues presented by the crazies on both sides. I would second the need for serious penalites for clearly fraudulent claims of abuse. People who falsely claim the other parent is sexually or physically abusing the child need a knot yanked in their tails.

The Washington Times is fish wrap.

[Solo_in_MD]

9. You have more faith in Family Court than I do...

Seen too many dumb stupid decisions and Family Services at times is not much better.

[FreakinDJ]

6. Please protect the crack addict mothers

We need more welfare moms to raise the next generation of victims.

CANOW lobbied against judges for giving the father custody when Mom was a raving drug addict. I can’t think of a more noble cause.

[bloom]

8. For related links see:

http://www.thelizlibrary.org/liz/

[mongo]

10. What a misandrist site

Fathers are unimportant and should NEVER be given custody, joint or otherwise.

Wow.

[Cherry Blossom]

11. Wow, That Site is Disgusting

and enforces some ugly stereotypes.

[Odin2005]

12. How disgusting.

Men can be just as good of parents as women.