Why do people act like being veg means you can never go out to eat?

[sbj405]

Mostly a vent here.

My friend will never suggest a place to eat claiming it's because she doesn't know where I can eat. sigghhhhh. I am vegetarian and big a major city. I can eat pretty much anywhere. Without fail, whatever place I suggest fails to meet her standard for whatever reason (too expensive, bad service, bad food, etc.).

[flvegan]

1. Because it's a passive aggressive way to parry

your decision into being an issue or problem. Sort of like saying "since my friend is gay, we can't go to straight clubs."

Try that one out. See where it gets you. When they draw a line in the sand, laugh, jump up and down on it, then kick it back in their faces.

[ThomCat]

6. Absolutely right.

My friends who are not veggies are the pickiest people about where to eat. I have far more favorite restaurants than they do. They like diners with lots of poorly cooked meat.

[LeftyMom]

2. Guilt.

If being veg is easy, there's no reason for them not to do it. So veg food is expensive (even when it's not) gross (no matter how good it is) and we can't eat out anywhere (the only place I've found where that was pretty much true was the middle of the nevada desert, but there isn't much out there for anybody unless they dig greasy diner food in smoky casino restraunts.) They have to make being veg*n a bigger sacrifice than it is, harder than it is and less fulfilling than it is so they have a better excuse not to give it a shot than selfishness.

[yewberry]

3. Ugh.

Here's how I deal with that scenario:


Friend (okay, imagine that I have one): Hey, let's go get some dinner!

Me: Yay! Dinner is fun!

Friend: Wait, you're veg. (perplexed look) I don't know where we should eat.

Me: Well, what are you in the mood for?

Friend: I don't know. Where do they have food you can eat?

Me: Pretty much anywhere. I could go for Thai or Mexican or Mediterranean food. Are you in the mood for any of that?

Friend: Sure.

Me: Okay, well, we can go to Pailin, Guaymas, or Cedars. You choose.

Friend: Um. Okay. Cedar's.


TA-DAAA! (Please note: your experiences may vary.)


PS--That bugs me, too. Sorry your friend is being unhelpful!

[sbj405]

8. Yeah, that typically works

except for the incessant complaining about whatever place is chosen. You know b/c we had to go there b/c I'm veg. :sarcasm:

I think flvegan's right. It's her passive aggressive side coming out. Or maybe she's just difficult, she acts like the 10 miles we live apart is half the earth.

[Coventina]

4. Wow. I am such a dumbell!

Ever since I went vegetarian my dad ALWAYS asks "Where can we eat?" or "I don't know where you can find anything to eat." Whenever we make plans to eat dinner out together. I mean, this has been going on for YEARS. Ever since I first gave up beef in the early 90s.

I was always perplexed by this, I never realized it was him being passive aggressive. Now I see it plain as day. I don't know why I never did before.

My dad wrote the book on passive aggression. He looooooves to play the martyr.

:eyes:

[Robeson]

5. It is funny, isn't it. On a positive note...

...by being a vegetarian, I've been able to expose my friends to much wider culinary tastes than they previously had. Turkish, Greek, Moroccan, Indian, Thai, and a host of other foods, which - with their meat and 3, or ribs diet - they never even knew about. And now, they love those foods!

[BrklynLiberal]

7. Ignorance? I just usually say that I can always find SOMETHING to eat.

:D

[Beaverhausen]

9. I guess I'm lucky - people ask me in a postive way "where can you eat?"

Here in Los Angeles it really isn't an issue due to lots of veggies here but when I lived back east my family and friends would always be considerate about my having choices whenever we went out or had dinner at a friend's.

I had one friend who had the wheat allergy, so we also had to take into account where she could eat. Often she brought her own "rice crackers" but if we did a group dinner we all tried to make dishes with no wheat/flour and they made sure there were enough non-meat items for me.