Unfortunately the only experience many people have with grits is the runny, tasteless variety served at places like Waffle House or Denny's or the instant/quick variety and that is a shame. Grits can be one of the most tasty and versatile foods you'll ever prepare. If done correctly, they are truly brilliant! If you or your family has an aversion to grits, just call them polenta. It's the same basic ingredient and if you can't find grits in the store, look for polenta. Polenta is always made from yellow cornmeal (coarse ground of course). Grits may either be made from white hominy or yellow cornmeal. I prefer yellow. In all cases they will be coarse ground, which is the key here. The preparation methods for grits or polenta is traditionally slightly different, which I will explain.
Whether you're making grits or polenta, the basic recipe is the same:
8 cups of liquid (more on this later)
2 cup of grits (or polenta which is the same thing)
3 tsp salt
1 stick of butter (optional)
I always make this amount, even though I'm usually cooking for 4 or less. Leftovers are a good thing here(I'll explain why later) and the basic ingredients are very cheap so you might as well make extra. I very much like the idea of cooking once, and eating twice, especially when the leftovers are just as good (or better) than the first time around.
In a large dutch oven heat the liquid over high heat until it comes to a boil. Slowly stir in the grits. Cover and reduce heat to medium low. Cook on the stove for 5 minutes, stirring once halfway through. The idea is you don't want to stir any more than is necessary. Stirring the grits too much will make them rubbery and is not what you want. After the 5 minutes, put the covered pan into an oven preheated to 350 degrees F. Stir every 10 minutes. It takes about 30 minutes in the oven. After the 2nd stirring taste for doneness. If the grits taste gritty, they are not done. When the grits are done, add 1 whole stick of butter (4 oz). I know this sounds like a lot of butter, but this is a BIG batch of grits and will make at least 8 good sized servings. So you're really only talking about 1 Tbs of butter per serving. If you have a saturated fat or cholesterol aversion, leave the butter out or reduce it and it will be fine. You can also add butter at the table for individual choice.
For the liquid, it really depends on what you're after. If you're making polenta, I would use stock for the liquid. If you are making grits, I would use water and dairy. I generally use 2 cups of water and 2 cups of milk. You can also use 3 cups of water and 1 cup of cream, or you can leave the dairy out altogether if you wish.
Once the basic grits (or polenta) is prepared, you are only limited by your imagination. You an either serve them as is, or you can add extra things. For grits, cheese is traditional (about 8 oz shredded). For polenta, you can use all sorts of things like steamed and chopped asparagus, caramelized onions, sauteed wild mushrooms, chopped sun dried tomatoes, roasted garlic, shrimp, clams, chopped bacon, ... you get the idea. Stick with one or two ingredients is what I do. For grits, many people like to use syrup or sugar, however I must warn you this is considered sacrilege in the south. I just use a little pepper, but I do admit my kids have been known to apply a bit of maple syrup to theirs. I suspect this is due to their Yankee blood.
As you can see the recipe is pretty versatile and it's not that hard to adjust for vegans.
Leftovers are truly a beautiful thing here. I take the leftovers and put them into a loaf pan lightly coated with cooking spray. Cover with cling wrap pressed against the top of the grits. After a few hours (or up to 3-4 days) you'll have a little loaf that you can slice into 1" slices. For polenta, heat them up in the microwave until just warm and serve with a pork chop on top. The recipe for my legendary pork chops is here:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=236&topic_id=76592&mesg_id=76597For grits, take the 1" slices and brown them on each side in a hot cast iron skillet and a bit of olive oil. Serve with a bit of maple syrup drizzled on top. My kids especially like the next day fried grits for breakfast.
Edit: If you are using stock as your liquid ingredient, you should adjust the salt as necessary (or leave it out) to taste.