To Santa or not to Santa?

[Dora]

There's a thread in GD about outing Santa Claus http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x5611049.

My son is too little for Santa this year, but next year he'll be old enough to notice all the holiday bells and whistles. I'm not sure I want to tell him that Santa Claus is "real," but I do want to teach him about Santa nonetheless. I guess it'll go how everything else has so far - by guess and by golly.

How have y'all handled the Santa bomb in your homes? Any non-Santa types? Any fervent Santa's sleigh riders?

[Sweet Freedom]

1. Why not just teach him

that Santa is a tradition in your family? I did that with the tooth fairy at my house. My daughter's always known that I was the tooth fairy, but she still loved the whole idea.

If you teach your son that Santa is make-believe fun, he can still enjoy it and you won't ever have to worry about breaking his heart by telling him Santa isn't real.

[Dora]

2. I'm not really worried about it, but thanks for the suggestion.

Seeing the other thread today just made me curious about how other parents handle it, so I thought I'd ask.

Santa isn't particularly a "tradition" in our family, though he certainly did have a presence at our Christmases. If I recall correctly, he seemed to be fond of giving my mother lacy panties, and my father was very amused by that.

I never, that I recall, held a deep belief in Santa. I always liked the idea, and loved all the different Santa stories, but the myth was enough for me. I didn't need him to be a man.

[wildeyed]

3. I am not a huge fan of Santa.

We don't really discuss it. But this year my daughter heard about it at preschool and absolutely believes. I am not going to burst her bubble, but I am not going to encourage the belief much, either. I want to teach her that Christmas is about love, peace and joy, not just getting tons of stuff. Santa is more over on the materialistic side of things, IMO.

[LeftyMom]

4. I'm really not comfortable with the Santa myth

LeftyKid knows who Santa is but he's not real interested. I think he knows Santa's imaginary, but at four that line's still a bit blurry anyhow.

I just don't like the idea of setting kids up for a big dissapointment (they get enough of that in life) and I'd rather his gifts from family members be treated as such. It's just my personal opinion but I think the idea that Santa, this guy they don't even know, swoops down to give them toys sets kids up for a sense of entitlement. I'd rather my child's gifts come from somebody he can see and thank, somebody whose hard work he'll come to appreciate, because I think that's healthier in the long fun.

But I'm sort of ambivalent about Christmas, commercialism and compulsory gift-giving anyhow, so feel free to take my comments with a grain of salt.

[SW FL Dem]

5. I did Santa and loved it.

I'm not particularly religious and hubby is Jewish. For me, Santa (and the Easter Bunny and tooth fairy) are part of the magic of being a kid. My son loved it while it lasted and didn't suffer any harm when he finally figured out that Mom was Santa. It was a pain, sitting up late at night putting together the Santa gifts. Luckily I had my sister as an accomplice. Some of my favorite memories are of the two of us sitting the in middle of the floor with an open bottle of wine, giggling while we struggled to assemble the workbench, pirate ship or whatever the big gift was that year. The look of absolute wonder on my son's face when he came downstairs in the morning was priceless. The first Christmas without Santa wasn't the same. I really miss those days. Now my 14 yr old gives me his "list" in early December, I try to find a few things he would enjoy that aren't on the list and he definitely doesn't get everything he asks for. It still is missing the magic and the surprise of the Santa years.

[phylny]

6. We did Santa, too.

One of the greatest things was when the older ones "figured it out," but played along for the younger ones.

I have no regrets about Santa. Not one :)

[Tab]

7. The bigger question

is what you say when they're older and they ask if Santa is real.

I never wanted to lie, and I never wanted to tell the truth either (in this matter :) ), so what I ended up doing was turn the question around, and ask them what they thought.

Invariably, they'll self-justify it, until they're way old enough to know one way or the other anyway...

Lil me: "Dad, is there really a Santa Claus?"

Me: "Well, son, what do you think?"

Lil me: "I think there must be, because otherwise, how could (this, that, or the other thing) happen?"

And that's all there is to it! Been through two children and at least three fantasy creatures (Santa, Tooth Fairy, and Easter Bunny) and they make their own justifications and decisions, and there's no guilt at all. They decide if they want to persist in the belief.

Works like a charm.

[Robert Cooper]

8. Why not teach the truth...

That Saint Nick was a real guy, and we include his image in our christmas celebrations.

-Then- you can explain the 'urban legends' like how his reindeer fly, etc.

That's how I intend to explain it to my son when he's old enough.

In my family, I got the yucky job of answering my younger brother's question: "Is Santa real?" It had a lot to do with teaching me to be honest with my own.

[fortyfeetunder]

9. Dealing with one kid who already "knows"

my kid told me I was Santa Claus, and asked him to explain. He gave a plausible explanation for an 8 YO (making connections on how packages are labeled), and then I said, but I still believe in Santa Claus. He already knows and I figure this year we are cutting the pretenses.

In a way it's liberating for the kids to know the truth because I can say, well, this is the budget we have to work with for Christmas, and you can get X things with this budget....

[mzmolly]

10. Santa was like any other cartoon character in our home. Though we

do play "The Santa Game" where Santa leaves presents in the AM. Seemed like a good balance to us.

:hi:

[The empressof all]

11. We also embraced Santa in our family

To this day my 15 year old reports feeling quite cheated if the gifts don't mysteriously appear on Christmas Morning. Last year I put them under the tree as I wrapped which annoyed her to no end.

I always explained it as the Spirit of Santa comes into our hearts at Christmas time. SO and daughter now call my December shopping as Mom's channeling Santa.

I don't think it's harmed my daughter in any way. Kids grow up too fast now a days.

[Book Lover]

12. That's exactly my plan

I explain that Santa is a beautiful idea, and that people loved the idea so much they made a person out of him, like Lady Liberty or Justice. I may do the shopping/making of gifts, but when I do it at Yule, it's because the spirit of Santa helps me make the best presents. We'll see what he thinks at age 5!