Tell me your stories about seeing other parents do bad parenting...

[FormerDittoHead]

Last night. One set of errands, two times to wonder about other people's parenting...

First stop: Blockbuster.

Mother and son. Son could *NOT* have been TWELVE - looked more like TEN. Breezily looking through the R rated horror movie boxes (as in, he's watching them at home) We're talking the latest Hannibal movie, for example...

Second stop: convenience store.

Father with two VERY young boys. My twins are about to turn 3 next month so I can gauge pretty good.. These boys were like 3-4 and 4-6. They were cute, both dressed in the PJ's - the younger one had his little kid slippers on... The older boy... WAS IN HIS *BARE* FEET!

I was about to tell the person at the checkout when they all stepped up. I pointed down to the bare feet and said, "I'd be careful - someone could have dropped something on the floor..." "mumble... Oh, I 'preciate it... mumble..."

Is it some kind of mystery why you should wear shoes inside of a store or why pre-teens shouldn't be allowed to watch R rated violence (cannibalism, for crying out loud, with empathy to the cannibal).

If I was SCREWING UP MY KIDS, seriously, I would be offended at first at someone telling me how to raise my kids, but in the end I'd want what was BEST for my kids... They have ratings on those movies, and signs in the stores. What does one have to do?

[mopinko]

1. bare feet?

kids with bare feet is a crime?? you need to dial it down a notch. and btw, there are no laws requiring people to wear shoes. there is a real movement for bare feet. seriously. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barefoot

call me back when your kids are teens, and tell me what a good parent you were.

[FormerDittoHead]

4. My father was a lawyer..

Businesses have those signs on the door (like the one on the convenience store in question) not because of the law, but because of law suits.

My deceased father was a lawyer. While he was practicing, there were plenty of people suing businesses because they'd slip and fall, broken glass, etc.

Those easy going "dial it down a notch" barefoot and fancy free spirits go right to a "kick it up a notch" lawyer when shit happens, and it DOES.

I'm not TELLING anyone how to raise their kids. Having twins, I realize not to judge a PERSON.

I will freely take whatever help I can get, especially if it is given in a genuine effort to help my kids avoid injury or harm, and in that spirit, I offer it to others.

[Dora]

2. Bare feet in a Blockbuster doesn't bother me.

I think most/all Blockbuster stores are carpeted. The parking lot presents more of a risk to bare feet than the store does - and I'm not bothered by seeing a child's bare feet.

Unless I see a child struck, my policy is It's Not My Business, even with the ultra-violent movie issue. My SIL allows her kids to see gore films - she's a horror fan herself. I don't agree with the exposure, but they're not my children, and I can see that they're good kids.

[FormerDittoHead]

3. Read OP. It was a convenience store, where broken glass happens.

There's a sign on the door about bare feet.

Kids these young don't know well enough not to step on broken glass, let alone be able to read what those yellow tee-pee warning signs say or know what they mean.

Anyway, I honestly think I was doing the Dad a favor by pointing it out, and I have no regrets raising his awareness.

[Ms. Toad]

5. Although I agree with you about most horror movies,

The rating scheme is hogwash. I used to permit my teenage daughter to watch any PG-13 movie, but only R rated movies I had pre-viewed, until I realized how value laden the system was - and the values being assessed weren't my values.

Virtually any movie dealing realistically with homosexuality/gender issues - particularly pre-teen - will be rated R.
Frequent use of the F word also garners an R rating.

On the other hand, movies like Chicago - which are pretty sexually graphic - merit a PG-13.

(I generally don't use the F word - BUT, in the relative scheme of things I'd much rather have my daughter hear the F word a gazillion times in a movie like Billie Elliot than have her watch some of the trash that is rated PG-13 that glamorizes violence, treating women like sex objects, etc.)

For a more useful evaluation of movies, try kidsinmind.com. It provides an objective assessment of the content of movies (It describes all incidents of things in the categories of sex and nudity, violence, and language as well as giving it a numerical rating for each. It also suggests themes and topics for discussion with your children.)

Incidentally, had my friends been aware of kidsinmind.com before they innocently took their 3-5 year old children to see the G-rated "The Polar Express," they would not have. It ranks a 3/10 on violence and gore - which matches my friends' assessment that watching a child slip off the top of the train (among other things) was way too intense for children that young.

(Although I do respect "no barefeet allowed," shoes are a royal pain so I go barefoot wherever I can. If I step on something, I'll be paying the medical bills to the extent they aren't covered by my insurance.)

Edited to add the barefoot comments.

[tigereye]

6. I've never understood why parents let really young kids watch horror films

I can see discretion with the older ones, depends on the kid.


I only let my kid see PG 13 films recently and he's 11. He did see LOTR/the REturn of the King when he was a bit younger, since we had seen the whole series and he liked them.

What drives he crazy is parents who hit and yank their kid's arms.

I still remember how shocked I was when I saw a mom at my kid's daycare whack her son as she put him in the car. I don't think this was her typical MO since he seemed to be well cared for, but it always bothered me, since I really don't believe in hitting kids at all.