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I've experienced the same thing myself, which is one reason I haven't used it since, I think, version 8.04.
There are two issues here concerning Kubuntu.
The first -- and main -- issue is KDE itself. It is resource intensive, not quite as bad as Aero, but close. The developers made a decision as of KDE 4.0 to exploit newer hardware, and what you see as distinctive of KDE requires it. On the positive side, trimming it down to where it isn't eating up all your clock cycles doing its thing is possible. On the downside, it isn't trivial. Most of it can be done via menu options, but this isn't intuitive. There's no step-by-step on it, and some of the options that wouldn't seem to make much of a difference make a whole lot of difference.
On first log-in to your desktop, KDE makes an attempt to determine what your hardware can handle and customize its settings for that. However, this doesn't work as well as it should. It does in fact do what your hardware can handle, which is to say what it can do without freezing entirely. This doesn't mean it is usable.
KDE really requires compositing to be of much use with its current incarnation. That means you need 3D support, which likely means you're going to need a video card from NVidia or ATI and their proprietary driver properly installed.
The second problem is the way Kubuntu implements KDE. The development team for Kubuntu makes no real effort to streamline KDE's integration with the system. I wasn't fully aware of this myself until I used Linux Mint KDE edition, which is actually built from Kubuntu. However, the Mint team strips and tweaks to make things run more efficiently.
One thing I have discovered with this install is that your choice of themes for the plasma environment can affect this noticeably. The Oxygen theme is the default. It also seems to be the one that slows things down the most. I have a relatively high end system that doesn't have any problems unless I've got two dozen windows up with Compiz enabled. However, when I changed the default theme from Oxygen to one called "Glassified" I could see how things sped up.
KDE isn't for everyone. I prefer it, but that's just me.
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