1- Turn off wireless access, if at all possible.
2- Along with #1, use ethernet to connect to my modem and router.
3- Use an excellent consumer-grade router. Of course, you can spend a lot of money on commercial-grade routers
but that's usually overkill for a home.
4- Harden your OS:
http://www.itcoach.com/unsafe/System-Hardening.htm#steps (one of many pages on the internet about it)
5- Inspect your router log every day to see which IP addresses are trying to gain access. In my experience, you will see many IP's from China. Just stating
my experience. You can look up the locations by using this URL:
http://www.networksolutions.com/whois/index.jsp (again, one of many pages)
6- Make sure your DMZ is turned off. A "duh" step but worth mentioning.
7- On your "Security" router administration page (or something that means the same thing), turn on as many features as you can.
8- Turn off UPnP (Universal Plug and Play) service both in your router and your OS (if you have it). Yes, it makes life a tad more difficult but you
can open ports easily enough.
9- Make sure you only open ports that you absolutely have to. The usual way hackers gain access is by identifying open ports. Close the ports as soon as you can, if you can. You can test your router's ports with this service:
https://www.grc.com/x/ne.dll?bh0bkyd2 (Gibson's ShieldsUp).
10- Disable the Telnet service both in your router and in your OS. Only use Telnet very briefly and if you absolutely have to. Telnet is a very insecure protocol and a very old one, well known to hackers.
11- Malware scan your hard drives (including all floppies, CD's, DVD's, and USB thumb drives) with at least two excellent anti-malware programs. If you're really concerned, you can always backup your data, erase/format your hard drive and reinstall your OS anew.
12- Then.... I would use a security program as you have mentioned. I would also seriously consider a higher-grade commercial router if you are really concerned about it.
FWIW. Hope it was helpful.