My First Foster Dog just found a home ... why am I crying?

[Myrina]

I joined a foster group that specializes in Adult/Senior Beagles a few months ago.

Last month, I got a call from the Director that she was aware of a 5 year old male who had 24 hours left in a shelter before being put down. He'd been there for 2 months and nobody claimed him. Younger than what she normally
accepts, but he's a beautiful guy in perfect health: it would have been horrible to let him be euthanized.

He came into our house like a tornado (my resident dogs being 12 and 9) and turned the place on it's ear with his energy, personality, constantly wagging tail, and goofy facial expressions (he's got a little Bassett in him so his lips and tongue would get stuck on his teeth making it look like he was smirking or smiling).

The Director called me last evening to tell me that she's talked to a family that's ready to adopt him - ON FRIDAY! - and while I'm happy that he's going to have a loving family and lots of attention, I can't stop crying.

Is this because it's my first 'letting go', or am I too much of a softie to be a Foster parent?

Anyone with similar experiences/advice?

Thanks!!

[Sanity Claws]

1. Former foster mom here

I fostered three dogs but I formed an attachment only to one of them. I would have adopted that dog had she not found adoptive parents so quickly.
Based on my experience, this beagle may be the only foster dog you form such an attachment to. Just remember you helped a very special dog. In the meantime, keep fostering dogs and keep your heart open, you old Softie.

[Myrina]

2. Thanks, I suppose you're right ...

I didn't think I'd get this attached in just a few weeks, but maybe Peanut's an unusually special guy. :-)


:hug:

[Lorien]

3. I foster cats/ kittens

I cried over the first four or five. After that I only cried over the ones that died from illness (as happens so often with young kittens), but I was happy for the ones that found homes. Sometimes you need to remember the human component of the adoption; you may be giving a child their first pet, which they will remember for the rest of their lives, or helping a depressed or lonely person by giving them a new best friend. I was once contacted by a single middle aged man whose Maine Coon mix had died. He was obviously devastated by the loss. I had two Maine Coon mix kittens up for adoption. He came to see them and I could tell that he was instantly in love. He cuddled them and kissed them, and two week after the adoption wrote to me about how happy they were together. They really made a huge difference in his life. THOSE are the stories that make fostering all worthwhile!

Katori and Nakoma before going to their new home:

[spooky3]

9. what beautiful kitties! To the OP - the first 24 hours or so after adoption

were the hardest for me when fostering, but I was ok after that. Can you focus on how happy the doggie will be in his forever home? That sometimes helps.

Good for you for being a foster parent.

[Warpy]

15. When my little old lady cat finally goes

I'll start fostering cats and kittens. I don't want another full time housemate as I'm terrified I'd outlive one and there's no one to take one when I go.

Fostering seems like a great solution, all the good parts of living with companion animals and none of the fear about what happens to them when I'm gone.

There will be some I'll be sad to say goodbye to, but my reasons for doing so will make it doubly necessary.

[Why Syzygy]

4. My kitty was fostered

for the first six months of his life. I have been eternally grateful to that home, even though I never met them. They did such a good job with him. It was nice to get a little background information too. I know they made all the difference in his life.

[ehrnst]

5. foster mom here...

I got used to it, in part because I have two permanent pooches, and having more than that around is juuuuuust enough of a schedule filler that there is that little sigh of relief once you get your normal schedule back.

The hardest ones are the ones that bond very closely to you, and you know that they are going to wonder what happened, where you went, etc.

But as I have seen my fosters become so happy in their forever homes, that made the goodbyes easier each time. I know that they will indeed get over me, and become part of that new home.

[Myrina]

6. Here's Peanut ...

O8) I really AM happy for him, just a naturally-worried-mom, I guess.

Thanks for the feedback everyone! :hug:

[spooky3]

10. what a lovey! His luck definitely turned when you came into his life.

[Neecy]

12. he's a beauty!

I've fostered a lot of dogs, and I can tell you it's never easy to see one go. It makes it easier knowing that they're wanted in theit new homes and will have a second chance with a new owner.

There was one in particular that broke me heart to see him go. The morning I took him in to the animal hospital that was adopting him out I sat on the couch with him for a couple of minutes, giving him pets and telling him he had a great new forever home waiting for him. He looked at me sadly and licked my nose. THAT was hard because he was one of the sweetest dogs in the world.

As fate would have it, the new home didn't work out and he was back in a month. This time I decided not to let him go and adopted him myself - and I'm glad I did.

Dodger Dog:

[Obamanaut]

7. I got a speck in my eye just reading this thread. I don't think we

could foster. We have five sweet dogs now, if we tried fostering, it would be six, then seven then...

You must have a very nice family.

[Myrina]

8. Thanks ... I'm single ...

... that's also probably what makes it so hard to let Peanut go.

I have 2 resident dogs - 12 and 9 years old - who are basically my family and best friends.
Having Peanut around has been a good "pick me upper" for them, but I'm sure they're going to miss having him around to help with the "barking of the squirrels" in the back yard. LOL.

[badgerpup]

11. Not AZACKLY a 'foster' story, but...

...we took in a friend's cat when she had kittens and undertook to find homes for the four little bundles of fur, purr and playfulness.
Since there were already four adult cats resident on the premises (the dynamics of which were Misha and Kami vs Zorro and Mouse), before Princess Miu (aka Mama Kitty) and her kids joined the menage, we thought the faster the kids found their new forever homes (allowing Princess Miu to return to her home), the better it would be.
:hide::yoiks:
Family shows up, little girl falls in love with the largest female...little grey bundle of fluff we'd been calling Nei-chan ('sister') and out the door they go, everybody happy...except me.
I cried like a baby...didn't realize I'd gotten so attached to the little guys.

so don't feel too badly...seems to be a normal reaction. :hug:

[teenagebambam]

13. A big "bless you" to all Foster parents here

Both of my babies came from foster homes, and I shudder to think what might have happened to them had they not been given that extra chance.

[MiniMe]

14. Foster mom here too

I think I was lucky because I started fostering after I lost my first dog, and I wasn't ready to commit to another. It is sort of an occupational hazard when you foster. I would worry about you if you didn't get somewhat attached, it is part of the deal. I've been fostering now for about 6 years. I adopted one of my fosters, but I kept fostering because my boy enjoyed the company. I adopted my 2nd one last year because both my dog and I got pretty attached to him.

One of the things that they told me when I started is that you have to look at it like you are a stop in their search for a permanent home, and it is an important stop. You find out what the dog is like, and help train them and learn good house manners, and that helps them find a permanent home. They also told me that some you would cry when they left, and some you couldn't wait until they were out the door. All of that has been true so far for me.

I am supposed to be getting 2 puppies in tomorrow. I was told that they were 3.5 months old, but I have heard since then that they may be more like 6-7 months old. I won't find out for sure until tomorrow when I get them. Frustrating to be sure. I will take both because I said that I would, but if they are 6-7 months, I would have really only wanted to take 1. The rescue is almost out of boarding space, so I will make do. Luckily, they are puppies so I shouldn't have them for long, I hope. We never know when we are getting puppies in, and right now, we have a bunch of pups.

My best advice is to love them while they are with you, and know that you saved their life and made a dog's life better because you fostered.