Starcodes this Week - Heather Roan Robbins

[WhiteTara]

Starcodes Aug 20 2010

Wake up and smell the turning leaves. Love and challenge are this week’s themes as Venus and Mars conjunct in ever so friendly Libra and crank up our emotional expectations, while Saturn squares Pluto and challenges our sense of security all while the Sun opposes Neptune and Mercury turns retrograde and fuzzes out our brains.

Mercury, that rascally arbitrator of all things modern--how we communicate, import or move through the world—now slows us down and sends us back to clean our room and clean up our karma before the next season begins. We may think we’re supposed to be launching in the year ahead, but probably need to revisit a recent decision, correct a misconception, review the year or handle a problem already on our plates first.

As Mercury appears to back up against the zodiacal belt we can use the next three weeks to get organized and remember what we were doing before we let go for summer. Mercury in Virgo isn’t so fond of fuzzy thinking, and this can leave us irritable if we try to accomplish too much. It’s a good time to visit with old friends or strengthen old contacts. If we’re starting a new job, it’s time to find out what the last person was doing before they left. Get ready to start this year’s work after Sept 12th when Mercury turns direct.

Underneath this mental crankiness, Venus and Mars are lovely together in the night sky and they sing sweetly to us in Venus’ own sign of Libra. This Venus-Mars conjunction wants us to see the beauty way and can help us reach out in compassion to those that really need it. We dream of something better, something more cooperative or romantic, more fair and lovely in love or politics.

While this can bring delightfully romantic moments and introduce us to new friends and allies for the work ahead, they also can really increase the expectations we put on our relationships. Paradoxically, this aspect nudge us to become less tolerant of whatever seems to be standing in the way of our ideas, like a partner that isn’t living up to their potential or one that is being too critical of us. Notice this scenario has two sides, one who is apparently screwing up, not living up to the Libran ideal, and one who is, thanks to Mercury retrograde in analytical Virgo, noticing.

more here
http://www.roanrobbins.com/starcodes/stathswk/thwkfmst.htm

Hang on, my dears! Looks like we're in for another big ride!

[Mnemosyne]

1. Oh gods, not more!

Something needs to give soon, I am almost empty and it feels that I have nothing left to give or any fight left in me. I'm not sure how much more I can take of my situation now. I've always been thought the strong one, for everyone that has needed me. I've never felt as a victim, but the last year has been unending hell thanks to my h-sisters.

"Libra also speaks about open warfare and legal battles, any open relationship of equals, so strange law suits may get posted nudged by a tough, controlling Saturn square Pluto. This is an intense aspect we have felt all year, it now perfects one last time, and then begins to dissipate. All year long it has asked us to reassess our work in the face of life, death and transformation."

My sister is now executor of Mom's will, I was until June 1, 2009. She took a dying woman, whose bones were breaking each time she moved from cancer, and bullied Mom until she went to the lawyer and made her the only executor, June 11, 2009, 5 1/2 weeks before she died on July 11.

She stole a large sum of cash meant for the 5 sisters from Mom's safe as she lay dying, and has been trying to use the estate money and her power to try to hurt my daughter and I regarding our inheritances. It just never seems to end, as soon as one thing is resolved she finds something else to torment us with. I have spent the last year defending my daughter and myself.

Mom would be so disappointed that my h-sister used the power to try to hurt me. She only changed executor, after 5 years of sister bullying Mom since Dad was killed, because she believed my sister would be happy finally having the power and do the right thing. Sister convinced Mom, at last, that I was too disabled by bi-polar disorder to handle the stress of larger estate issues. Another crock, I was fine, only was upset at being kept away from Mom.

My daughter and I took care of Mom since Dad died in 2005. We dealt with breast cancer, then melanoma Stage 0 on upper arm and finally metastasized melanoma in almost every organ and part of her body; only her hands and feet were clear of cancer at the end and she was gone within 7 weeks of diagnosis.

My 3 half-sisters, who did nothing to help with Mom in those 5 years, stepped in after June 1 last year (day Mom got diagnosis), after Mom insisted I go sign the papers as executor that very day, and basically after 5 years of constant care and concern for Mom, I wasn't allowed to be near her more than a few hours in the last 7 weeks of her life.

H-sister born Dec. 19, 1970 and I was born March 25, 1958, if anyone feels any insights or intuition that may help me, I would be so very grateful.

Sorry to spew up in your thread, WT, just has been a terribly rough last year, on top of the 5 before it, dealing with abusive repuke h-sisters.

Guess I just need to hang on until the 12th and maybe it will finally ease up some. Seriously cannot take much more...

[WhiteTara]

2. big hugs to you

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I hope you have relief and peace soon
:hug::hug::hug:

[Mnemosyne]

3. Thank you so much, WT. I don't know how to share personal things very well

online and it just started pouring out. Kind of dis-jointed maybe, but it actually helped a bit to put it out there.

Thanks so much for the :hug:, I truly needed those today. :hug:

Namaste

[Delphinus]

4. I feel so badly for you, Mnemosyne

:hug:

You are not alone - although I am sure you feel that you are, you are not. :hug: May you feel the presence of love surrounding you.

[Mnemosyne]

5. Thank you so much, Del. It's been a real nightmare.

How family can treat someone, much less a disabled member, this way, is beyond my realm of imagination, so I am constantly shocked/crushed when it happens, again.

I was raised by the Golden Rule. My sisters were also, but they thought it was the other Golden Rule - He who has the gold rules.

:hug:

[WhiteTara]

6. Upon reflection, I've had more thoughts about

your "family" troubles. You are about to come to resolution. Then you get to decide whether you want any relationship with her/them again. You are about to be free. More :hug: