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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-11 08:40 PM
Original message
schadenfreude
Ok, I'm bad. I have just learned that at the end of last July, just as I was entering my 2 week period of total inner peace and tranquility and connectedness, in which I manifested various unexpected little gifts for myself -- the string of scratch ticket wins, the sundress at the lake, etc -- somebody who screwed me over royally several years ago died unexpectedly of a brain tumor.

Dead at age 51. Sorry, I know I shouldn't be happy. But I am. Another predator class gone. Just saw a picture of her husband. He looks like a rethug or a bankster or both. good fucking riddance.
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-11 10:35 PM
Response to Original message
1. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
I Have A Dream Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-11 11:12 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. ...
:hug:

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Howler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-11 11:09 PM
Response to Original message
2. SWEEEEETTTTTTT!
I remember that! What is your list of manifestation this time northernlights????
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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 09:17 AM
Response to Reply #2
8. Not sure I have a "list"
other than find the right buyer for this farm and move to what I wanted in the first place: small, passive solar with woodstove, on more land and within walking distance of a village...just downsize and relocate my cocoon. :hug:
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OneGrassRoot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 09:32 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. That sounds delightful....
I'd love the same. "within walking distance of a village"

Ahhhhhh, that sounds heavenly to me.

I'm popping in to give you big :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

:hi:

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Howler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 10:41 AM
Response to Reply #8
12. Well please let me throw in some Howlerville energy to help
((( Magnetize)))) Finding the right buyer for the farm and getting the PERFECT new home for your "cocoon"northernlights.
Because I think this time your manifestations are going to be even bigger and better then this last period was.
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BanzaiBonnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-19-11 11:14 PM
Response to Original message
4. I'm not sure what I feel...
Whatever happened must have been really horrible to have left you still so disturbed.

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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 08:36 AM
Response to Original message
5. it's ok, people, really
Edited on Sun Feb-20-11 08:37 AM by northernlights
I had a few minutes of good fucking riddance. And done. Personally, I think it is better to be open and honest about a feeling, give it its due, and then let it go. Better *that* than to try to be holier than thou and bury it...only to have it sneak its fugly little head out and drive you to do evil passive-aggressive things. But that's just me. I expect I'll have the same sort of feeling if/when my identity thief passes...:shrug:

Don't know what reply #1 wrote that got them deleted, but so be it. :D

Thank you, IHAD :hug: I'm ok now.

Bonzai, what she did wasn't, on the face of it, so horrible. She just screwed me over in a particularly important business deal. But under the surface, she robbed me of a 40+ year old life's dream. It just wasn't meant to be, I know. But what she did was *so* unecessary. She was super-wealthy. She literally had it all and could afford it all. That wasn't enough. She just *had* to help herself to my tiny little slice of pie, even while she was sneering at me.

It's like if you worked and slaved over a little garden, hand-tilled with a shovel, filled with compost, watered, weeded, nursed and tended your little seeds into seedlings and thenmature plants. And someone driving by, who had acres of gardens with dozens of employees to tend them, just couldn't resist pulling into your driveway, made off with your flowers, fruit and veggies and and mowed down your garden for good measure. Maybe threw salt on the soil, too, just for good measure.

There have been so many versions of her in my life, but she was the last one. Maybe someday the dream, like a garden, will come back. It doesn't look like it right now, but maybe someday it will. I just keep plugging away, dreaming and hoping. I remind myself of another version of her, with a lesser dream, sneering at me, "We should live so long." Well, we did live long enough in that situation, so I'll just keep reminding myself of that one...
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eilen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 08:40 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. I have no issue with you giving Karma a thumbs up. nt.
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Howler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 10:55 AM
Response to Reply #5
13. Hey, I agree northernlights
Edited on Sun Feb-20-11 11:44 AM by Howler
JUst because I work with the energies does not make me perfect.
I'm just more human then ever.LOL!
And quite frankly I have a temper and just because Mr Howler and I look and act like hippies does not mean we are pacifists.
We are more like WereWolves and every now and again we have need to let the beast run wild.LOL!
Don't let the Pugs fool ya.LOL!!!


Besides one of the many beautiful things about this particular forum is we are all able to share,talk,comfort, and VENT here.
Without the judgement and pressures of our life and society in general.This really is an oasis.
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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 11:05 AM
Response to Reply #13
15. just a reminder to Ms. and Mr. Howler, that dirty hippie
known as Jesus wasn't such a pacifist the day he turned over the moneychanger's tables :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
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Howler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Neither are most of his followers to be honest.
Now Budda there was a peaceful chap.
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I Have A Dream Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 02:49 PM
Response to Reply #5
24. northernlights, in reference to the initial hug...
it was actually for the person whose post was removed since that person was very upset. However, I always have a hug for you, my friend.

I'm so sorry that you were hurt by the woman who died. I hope that she is now able to see the damage that she did to you (and probably many others) now that she's on the other side. May she, at some point in the future, make is up to you in a positive way that is beneficial to both of your souls.

My wish for you is that you only have positive people come into your life from this point on unless you truly need a particular person for an important life lesson. Otherwise, I hope that the Universe will bless you with peace.

:hug:

:loveya:

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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 03:40 PM
Response to Reply #24
25. oops. ah well, here's another one any way
:hug:
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Celebration Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 09:15 AM
Response to Original message
7. Okay, well
Remind me to keep on your good side. ;)
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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 09:20 AM
Response to Reply #7
9. I didn't cause her death
only stumbled across the news of it. I'm sure she doesn't care that I'm not mourning her loss :D
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Kind of Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 10:22 AM
Response to Original message
11. I understand how you feel, NL.
I have one such person in my past who reared his ugly head through a friend on Facebook. I know he is ill and dying, and I've been lectured on the great virtue of forgiveness by this friend. But I felt nothing, as the song goes, because the thing is I've forgiven and healed myself. I also know that all I lost due to this awful man, and my naivete, changed my life's course and landed me right here and now - a place and state of being I treasure. One day I'll appreciate(?) why such viciousness from an older man heaped on a young woman - or not - whatever. I truly hope he basks in white light now, but I have no interest to know whether he does or not. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
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northernlights Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 11:01 AM
Response to Reply #11
14. I'm so sorry KOB
I don't know what motivates some older men to heap visciousness on young women...I've had my share, though, so I have some sense of the damage they can do. :hug: :hug: :hug:

While mucking out the barn, it dawned on me that a part of my Good Riddance is knowing that, should my little dream grow wings again, she won't be around to steal it. And, taking my garden analogy one step further, my seedlings (along with the seedlings of others she stole from) are growing safely in her garden. And now, thanks to the economy, are starting to be a dime a dozen. So maybe she inadvertently did me a favor by protecting them during the past few years of upheaval...so they'd be ripe for me to pick when my turn comes 'round again...:D
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Kind of Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 12:06 PM
Response to Reply #14
17. Bravo! I Love the way you think!
And may I add that whatever karma we had to work out between us, that we are paid in full! Good-bye in this life and the next - I certainly don't want no "Reincarnation of Peter Proud" action coming back to bite again :rofl:
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I Have A Dream Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #17
20. It's interesting that you mentioned "Reincarnation of Peter Proud".
That was my first introduction to the concept of reincarnation. I was completely blown away; I had never even heard of it before then, and it immediately felt right. I read the story in Cosmopolitan magazine, of all places. Reading it created a complete paradigm shift in my life. I've never heard anyone else ever reference it before. :thumbsup:

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Kind of Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 01:27 PM
Response to Reply #20
21. Good Lord, IHAD!
I should be working but just looked it up and as of 2009 - it's being REMADE by some guy named David Fincher http://www.pajiba.com/trade_news/david-fincher-the-reincarnation-of-peter-proud.php Though I knew about reincarnation, the movie was like a kick in the stomach to me back then - so I know what you mean by the paradigm shift.

I read in Wiki that it inspired a Hindi movie and has been remade 2 more times in India, as recently as 2008.

I loved Cosmopolitan - taught me everything about what I should be doing for my man - though I didn't have one for many, many years later :rofl:
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I Have A Dream Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 02:11 PM
Response to Reply #21
23. For me, I had to "unlearn" everything it "taught" me!
:rofl:

(It didn't take me long since I was rolling my eyes the entire time I was reading it anyway! :D)

I loved that magazine, but I hated its focus on what to do to please men -- as though our value as women was based upon whether men were pleased with us. Geesh! :eyes:

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japple Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Feb-21-11 06:19 PM
Response to Reply #20
28. Oh, I remember that movie. I found it fascinating, and it came at
a time when my mind was opening. And to think that some of us read Cosmo!! I thought that magazine was so hip and sexy!! When I see it in the grocery store these days, I think "they're still running the same articles they did 30+ years ago!!!"
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Mist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 12:34 PM
Response to Reply #11
18. Forgiveness is something many don't get. I used to hate how people seemed to use the
word---as if I'm to say "Yeah, it's okay you treated me like crap."

That's NOT what forgiving is--when I looked it up in the dictionary years ago, I read "giving up anger against."

Quite a different meaning, and one I can see the point of.

And BTW, NL, sometimes people have what's coming to them. Sounds like the person you wrote of earned it.
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Kind of Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 01:30 PM
Response to Reply #18
22. Exactly - giving up anger.
And that's hard enough to do while throwing forgiveness into the mix and still trying to love yourself. One step at a time.
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Mist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Feb-21-11 12:50 PM
Response to Reply #22
27. The way I understand it, giving up anger IS forgiveness. nt
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Mist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 12:39 PM
Response to Reply #11
19. I used to really dislike hearing about forgiveness---the way people used the word it
Edited on Sun Feb-20-11 12:40 PM by Mist
sounded like "Yeah, it's okay you shat all over me, no prob."

I finally looked up the word in the dictionary, only to learn that to forgive means to "give up anger against."

That's a meaning I can use--not giving energy to those who have wronged you. But I still have trouble with it sometimes!

And NL, it sounds like the person you described had it coming. I think some people "toxify" themselves to death. Maybe they're a lesson to us all to avoid not only such behavior, but (and I need to remind myself of this) not to give too much energy to hating them. That's toxicity too. As I say, I need to remind myself of this FREQUENTLY.

Sorry for the double post. Something hinky was going on and I thought the first post didn't make it, so had a "do-over"!
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-20-11 03:54 PM
Response to Original message
26. I feel you on the "schaden is tasty" thing. Mostly because
enjoying the schaden, with a nice garnish of freude, has really helped me get past the anger and resentment I have felt toward others in the past. I feel the schaden, then I move on. It's a straight route toward acceptance in some cases.
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