So, I was a real a**hole to someone last week

[teenagebambam]

and not even really *to* them ( it's a work situation, and instead of taking a grievance directly to them , I went to the boss) At the time I felt totally justified, in hindsight I don't, and in fact feel almost like a chess piece in someone else's game. Right now I just feel absolutely stuck, not sure how to make things better, sure that any attempt I make to do so would backfire. Ugh!

[cate94]

1. I had a similar situation once.

Ultimately, I told my co-worker what I did and asked if there was anything I could do to make it right. Then I did exactly as my co-worker asked. It really pissed my boss off because he was looking for a way to get rid of the guy I crossed. However, my apology and follow through ended up changing peoples attitudes towards me to the the better. I gained quite a bit of respect and trust.

I didn't make it right for anything other than my own self respect. But if you were in your co-workers shoes what would you hope for?

Do whatever your gut tells you to do. It is usually right.

[OneGrassRoot]

2. I think that's really good advice.

I was going to suggest the same: be honest. Be honest with the co-worker and go from there.

Good luck. :)

:hug:

[teenagebambam]

3. That's the problem

my gut isn't telling me anything - I feel like I'm stuck in glue! And yes, the boss was looking for ways to get rid of said person, and I was one of several people with the same complaints - that's what I meant about feeling like a chess piece.

I am getting closer to taking action though...

[I Have A Dream]

4. I had a similar situation recently...

that really bothered me even though I didn't think that I was doing anything at all inappropriate at the time. It was only after seeing the results of my actions that I realized that an innocent person was pulled in where they shouldn't have been. I wrestled with it a really long time because I didn't know if anything negative had actually manifested because of my actions, and I didn't want to "open a can of worms" unnecessarily. In the end though, after much soul searching and self castigation, I decided that I had to tell the person what happened and forgive myself for what was initially done with no intent to harm the innocent victim in any way. I realized that by telling the person what I did, the potential was there that they would never trust me again, but in the end, I decided that it was more important that I rectify the situation than keep myself protected.

For me, rectifying the situation as much as I could was required of me as a spiritual adult. It wasn't easy though.

Good luck, tabb. :hug: