Analysis after the Mars-Pluto explosion 2 weeks ago

[Ricochet21]

I have seen so many people go through such a wide variety of "breaks" to their long-stored tedium. So many situations that begged for movement and change. Boom! Many of them went through the catharsis on the 8th and 9th as predicted.

Now what? Some people are shattered. Some have been liberated. Certainly, "aftershocks" have been felt (earthquake?)

What I'm seeing now is a temptation for many to run back to their "holes" of pseudo-safety. That's not what to do. I think if you take a good look at things, you'll find that you CAN now handle the new situation; we're just not used to it. It ultimately is a victorious time. We have been released and renewed.

What are you feeling?

Own your new power.

Oh, and by the way, I see nothing but crumbling and decay headed straight for the Repo party and the Tparty, they brought it on themselves.

Good luck to everyone. :grouphug:

[I Have A Dream]

1. I don't know since Neptune...

seems to have taken up permanent residence on my Chiron. :eyes:

It's difficult to separate that from the rest that is going on, transit-wise.

I had been feeling a bit better the last couple of weeks, but I'm starting to feel overwhelmingly weary again. One of the running questions throughout my life has been what it feels like to have energy and to feel truly alive -- to not just be going through the motions to get through the day.

So... given everything that's hitting us right now, I guess that I'm handling things OK.

How about you, Rick? :shrug:

(On edit: fixed punctuation.)

[Ricochet21]

3. I'm very anxious to talk to you about this

especially because of Pluto's effect on your bucket handle. I suggest to you that Neptune is not as much of an issue as Pluto is now for you. Why? Because you have such a strong Neptune to begin with. True, Neptune will greatly enhance your intuition, etc. But that Mars is shaking and stirring - one big deal.

I had major upsetting experiences in my immediate family; truly life-altering. But, in a large way, it now puts the past in perspective. My 2nd Saturn return was exact this morning. I woke up feeling like I wanted to hide, then I said to myself, NO,
this is for grasping my new power. I then extrapolated that to everyone else and could see that this truly is the aftermatch of the 8th and 9th - so I wrote about it.

Pluto is hard because we're so used to having people around and leaning on others when we don't need to. Perhaps this is why so many Scorpios are so private?

I am encouraged one day and then when I take in what's happening in the "world", I get down. We are the strength. One can see madness all around. Thank God I'm in a group like this.

If I can help anyone, please let me know. I do not have the time to interpret everyone's charts, but if I can answer brief questions, I'd be glad to do so.

I hope you're all on the upswing.
:hi:

[I Have A Dream]

5. Awwww... I wish that I could help you.

:loveya:

If there's anything at all I can do to help you or to ease your burden, please don't hesitate to ask. You give to others all the time; you need to receive as well, my friend.

Just remember that you're not alone. I'm just a few minutes away when you need me, even if it's just for another shoulder to lean on.

:hug:

[Kind of Blue]

10. I second that!

I know I'm a long way away from you, but I can't tell you how often I think about you and appreciate you so much. I can't quit you :D Sending huge waves of gratitude that you are alive :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Ricochet21]

11. Thank you KOB

Much appreciated. :hug:

[I Have A Dream]

12. I know! He gives so much; we're so lucky to have him here.

Hey, Blue, we have earthquakes now, so you would feel at home here. :rofl: You and I could both take classes with Rick! I drive him crazy ;); you'd be a balm to his soul (as you are for everyone).

I'm sure that he sometimes rues the day that he asked me to be in his astrology class, but I'm pretty sure that he knows that I love him dearly, so that hopefully makes up for some of the aggravation I cause him.

:loveya:

[Ricochet21]

16. I love teaching IHAD

do not be mistaken, you ask good questions and are more than fair. Let's just say, I can't get by with any bs with you; and that's good! Now, we need a place to teach class soon. Help!

You're a model student.

[Kind of Blue]

19. LOLOL!!! Dratz and Curses! And here I thought

I could run back to the East if it ever got too bad out here.
And you know I'll add to the craziness if I were in the Rick class with you and get us both kicked out, for sure :rofl: :rofl:

Well, I know I've seen you fill in many times before Rick answers and that's a sign of a good student! :hug: :loveya: :hug:

[Missy Vixen]

40. Your insight is light in a dark time

I hope you count me as a friend, too. We pick up our feet and walk, but just like the song, you'll never walk alone.

My husband had surgery yesterday. He's going to be fine. We're getting through this. As far as my career, I'm sending out more queries starting next week. I feel like I am in a pitch-black, closed room, looking for an invisible door with a blindfold on.

Even on the tough days, there is so much to be thankful for, especially each other.

[FirstLight]

45. Rick, you rock!

:loveya: :grouphug: :bounce:

I know exactly what you mean about being encouraged one moment and then depressed at the state of things the next...'
This is Mr. toad's wild ride all the way around, and I would not know what to do these days without you and everyone else here in ASAH.

still struggling with my own stuff, I can feel the waffling effect for sure...one day on, two days 'off' ...two days good, then crash and burn...hoping for a bigger breakthru monday when the kids go back to school and I have some time to focus on ME!

[Avalux]

2. I posted here about my strange weekend....

since then, since making the decision to not 'help' my ex, I feel a mix between liberated and shattered. It's difficult to explain, but I go back and forth from one to the next. You talk of pseudo-safety and I think it's human nature to want to revert back to old patterns because it's what we know, even if it's not good for us. So maybe that's why I feel shattered every now and then.

I need to get accustomed to my new power, and not be afraid of it. :hi:

[Ricochet21]

4. EXACTLY WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT

Sit in it Avalux. Let it be. Don't run back. Let it be what it is, for now, it is what it really is instead of pretending what coulda shoulda.
I predict it will only take a short while before you really get used to it.
Congratulations are in order!

[Avalux]

52. But what am I getting used to? I've never been here before....

that's what is a bit unsettling I suppose. I am focusing on not operating from a place of fear and worry and overthinking...here's what I realized just yesterday....

I usually become anxious and apprehensive about important situations/scenarios and play them out in my head in anticipation of the event. Then while actually in the situation/scenario, if it doesn't go the way I had pre-planned in my head, I get nervous, not be able to go with the flow and afterwards, sit and think about everything I did wrong; how badly I messed up. Very self-critical.

I am determined to stop thinking this way as I realize it's destructive. :hi:

[get the red out]

6. Thanks, as always

I feel "more power" to not let old negative thinking patterns win. I have been mulling that about today and now I see this. It's a change, and I've been wondering how it was happening.

[Ricochet21]

8. It's been building for 3.5 years

Each peak experience (Mars agitation) makes it more conscious or buried.
Good for you

[get the red out]

30. I even forgot to mention the biggie

Our parents' house sold during this time, my sister and I go back to the home town to close on it today, effectively cutting the tie with our childhood and the tiny town we grew up in.

[FirstLight]

47. wow, that's big

I miss my old house sometimes, though i wouldn't live back in the Bay area for anything now. I guess I miss the time i grew up in...
My parents sold it in 2007, and it was a big narly process for them too...my dad built the house with his brother & father.

good luck with that process, keep us posted :hug:

[Sienna86]

7. Had an issue with my ex

Several days ago. Same old stuff came rearing back, and I was feeling brutally undermined in regards to my teenage son. An occasion came up to speak with my son, who had aligned himself with dad. I explained my reasoning and it he made a turn-around. Funny, I didn't feel tied to the outcome. For all I knew, he'd pack up and head to dad's. I let it all go and explained why I was doing what I was doing. Don't know if this is tied to what you're talking about Rick, but I faced one of my worst concerns (teenage son moving to dad's - and dad has major issues...) and for now, it's turning out okay.

[Ricochet21]

9. If I may say so

in my experience, it's working out because you ACTED (Mars). If you hadn't, it could have been less than pretty.
Good for you too! It's happening all over. I have seldom seen such across-the-board results like this last Mars transit.

Get this: I've been very worried about a male friend of mine who let's his wife dominate him like crazy. I watched that date come to his chart for months now.

It came, no blow up, I was surprised. The planets work in funny (unpredictable) ways.

What did happen? His daughter moved out with her college friends. Now, he and his wife have an empty nest (even the dog died) and now he has to face her directly with no triangulation to hide behind. See?

The planets "force" us to do what we must because "they" know what's going on inside of us and how we must face our blockages, wow.

[kimmerspixelated]

13. This is an interesting ride we're on, huh, Rick?

I am going to really THINK (I know, haha) on this and look at patterns and new reflections, events since the time frame in question, and get back to you..I want to really examine this... I'm fried for the day, but generally energized!:hug:

[Ricochet21]

17. Give it time, give it time

it WILL become clear
we are all chaning SO FAST!

Uranus in Aries....

[teenagebambam]

14. Remind me what was happening in April-May

Cause that's when all these themes seem to have started manifesting for me.

The return of a person whom I had sort of let atrophy away as opposed to "dealing" with - now employed in my city, improbably, in the EXACT SAME close-knit industry.

And on May 2 I suddenly awoke with the desire to start eating right and exercising, and have stuck with it, after not being able to do any of the above for the past twenty years. (35 pounds so far. Yay me!)

So I can't really say I noticed any "explosion", since things have already been in motion for a couple months....

[Ricochet21]

15. To all

that is the problem I have trying to explain this stuff. It is difficult for non-astrologers to understand the era we are in and the subcycles accordingly. Once you have watched the rings of planets circulate within the other rings, you'd see; but, you have to have it presented to you in class on a whiteboard, etc.

In other words, it's HAPPENING to all of us now, all of us, only in our own frame of reference, we can't always see what is what.
It is happening to you and me, but we're too close to see it yet - revisit this in a week, and you'll see exactly. I'm more finely tuned to it because I've been watching these events for so long and ascertaining their impact. It also matches the "world" which seems to be "out there" and isn't: earthquakes, revolutions, hurricanes. It's all the same.

Bam bam, your events ARE accurate for April/May and also for now. Remember THESE EVENTS HAVE NOTHING to do with external events, all events are internal, then sometimes seemingly manifest in an "external" way. Either way, you're doing great!

[Me.]

18. Lovely

"Oh, and by the way, I see nothing but crumbling and decay headed straight for the Repo party and the Tparty, they brought it on themselves"

Time frame or delicious gory details?

[Ricochet21]

20. Hard to say

but the repos are going to be totally eaten up with corruption (Neptune return) over the next 6 years... each year getting MUCH worse.
The Tparty won't last long because they are based in hate. They have already started to fall apart because they are not based in truth. They are eating their young.

Don't be confused, Obama is in big trouble; he'll be accused of things you won't believe, much worse than now. Some, he brought on himself, but mostly, he is just a symbol of our own Godlessness.

He knew he was to play this role.

THe repubs are Cancer with Moon in Scorpio

[Ricochet21]

21. I'll share the repo chart with you someday in detail

It's just awful; just like them.

and the phenomenal similarity between Perry and the TParty's charts... cruel

[kimmerspixelated]

22. I vow

that one of the reasons Texas has stayed hot for so long is because it is trying to produce a steady fever to purge that asshole from it's immune system!:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Me.]

27. Much Appreciated

And yes Obama has brought much of it on himself. His choice of advisers has been deadly. Further, I feel if his numbers keep falling and he starts out the year at 25 or less, he is done. There is much I don't get about Obama and why his admin would do things like give the banks a pass and pressure Attorneys General to let them escape, prolong the wars, let the likes of Cheney off etc. However his falling numbers may be just the kick in the pants he meeds. For all his talk about not minding if he is a one termer I bet the leo in him will not want his presidency to be judged as hapless.

[Ricochet21]

42. Yes but

I think he somewhat has a self-destruct death wish with his Tsquare to Neptune

[eilen]

31. Doesn't the Moon in Scorpio usually

indicate infidelity?

[Ricochet21]

41. You can never say that with certainty, no

infidelity is Scorpion in the sense of revenge, or having been betrayed
infidelity is almost always from a Neptune transit - escapism

[davsand]

23. Found out today the cat is out of the bag regarding my plans.

I'd hoped to keep stuff under wraps a little longer regarding my plans to run a primary campaign against a former co-worker. However, I heard today that Tuesday night he was out in a bar--drunk--and he was telling other people that he'd heard I am planning to run against him. My first thought was "Oh crap!" However, the longer I thought about it, the less I care. He can do or say all he wants to--I am coming after him and it ain't gonna change. He's mess, he's screwing up, he's pissing people off right and left, and I am gonna take him on. I gotta admit, the decision to do this was not an easy one, but it is the right one. I put up with his shit the entire time I worked with him, and I am just OVER bowing and scraping to get along with him.

I am also over hearing him tell me I am somehow less than he is professionally. Screw that. I am moving ahead with my family's support, and I am done hiding from anybody.



Laura

[Ricochet21]

24. I'd say found your power

Go get him

[Me.]

25. Go Get Him

And when you do post your info so that those of us who would care to contribute can.

[davsand]

26. Wow. That really got me.

Can't begin to explain it--lord knows I have raised campaign money for any number of folks over the years--but having anybody make that kind of offer to help me just about did me in. Your offer means an awful lot, Me.

I'm verklempt.



:hug:




Laura

[Me.]

28. My Money Is Going To Progressives

And the type of people that would post on a forum like this. That is who I want in charge. Good luck and kick his A double S.

[I Have A Dream]

38. Me too!

I'll be happy to support our sister-in-spirit with a donation!

:applause:

[rosesaylavee]

48. Me too!

Git em. Enough of the bad guys performing badly.

Let us know when you got that Act Blue thing up and going. :hi:

[WhiteTara]

35. Go davsand!

This is the time for women in politics and power. It is time to be the Amazon you are. Rise up Woman Warrior! Shield yourself with truth. Let the righteous rage of Kali burn the fear away. Stand for justice! We need you.

[I Have A Dream]

39. Good for you, Laura!

Now is not the time to hide. Shine on, sister!   B-)

:woohoo:

[Habibi]

29. What am I feeling? Righteous anger, and a desire for vengeance.

Well, you asked. :-)

I have a God complex, maybe.

[WhiteTara]

36. Kali and Durga are Goddess' who are associated

with righteous anger. May their blessings and strength allow you to use your anger to right wrongs. Strive for justice and not revenge, it will help the world so much more.

[I Have A Dream]

37. ...

:thumbsup:

[WhiteTara]

51. you lift me up!

:loveya::hug:

[eilen]

32. The planets -- don't know if it is Mars, Uranus, Saturn or Pluto-- Chiron?

Seem to have really brought back my desire to work with patients on the floor again. I appreciate all the positive energies sent to me in my job search and once I get some concrete information about the job (interview went very well) I will post all about it with big Whoops. Currently I am working with people with Congestive Heart Failure and it has been so rewarding. I am hoping that all our efforts at educating people to care better for themselves will bear out with lower readmission rates.

However, as much as this is very rewarding, I can see how badly our healthcare system is broken and as an extension, our society. It is so very sad to see where our priorities are as a modern society.

As frustrating as it is to work within this system that works against its own stated goals; I feel I can help make some positive impact on the people who are caught up in it. Whether it is in just providing enthusiasm and encouragement to convince people to take a larger role in their own healthcare, or in just being another warm body with a license to ease the burden of the work among my floor's team... I can still save someone's life and learn quite a lot.

Regarding Mercury going direct: Please, I need a new printer/scanner-- I just will not buy one until Merc is moving forward. Also, I need the state to refund my taxes paid on a vehicle (they made me pay twice). With Mercury related delays it is amazing how quickly (on the dime) the delays end when it goes direct.

[Ricochet21]

43. That's Neptune traveling with Chiron, imho nt

[Dora]

33. Feeling? LOL.

I don't know, Rick. I'm trying not to spend much of my energy thinking about how I'm feeling. There's so much for me to feel negatively about. You looked at my chart and my ex-husband's chart a year and a half ago, and you gave me the sage advice to GET A LAWYER. I don't know what it was you saw, but it has certainly manifested.

Here I am - unemployed because I quit my job in order to take care of my son this summer, no income, my ex isn't paying child support or doing anything he's supposed to to get our house ready to sell. But I have a home to myself and my son is healthy and happy and resilient. I qualified for public assistance so I know that we'll have food on the table. When I start to feel afraid or angry or regretful I don't dwell in it, or I try not to. Yesterday, in the car, I was so down in the dumps and I knew it wasn't good for me. I knew I had to raise my vibration. So I hummed. I found a note I could hold and that felt right and I hummed it until I got to my destination. I got there ready to do the unpleasant work I had to do. And I did it quickly, without thinking any of the dark thoughts that had been plaguing me before.

I am finding myself now with the space I thought I needed to pursue my dream/idea. I don't know how to move out of my fear of risk and actually work towards manifesting my idea instead of worrying about finding a "real" job.

Something tells me that this is my time. But I don't know which way to go. :shrug:

[Ricochet21]

44. You're on the right track

Hooray for you, I love the humming part. The way to go is
part 1: away from where you were
part 2: will come later as you get your feet out of the muck

what an ABSOLUTE COMPLETE blowout this Mars stirred up this month, and, it's coming back after a long retrograde period in July '12.

Way to go Dora, Pluto brought you the courage.

[Dora]

53. I reread the August newsletter.

"Pluto alienates you... will not let you hide."

And alienated is exactly what I've been feeling of late. Partially as a result of my unemployment, but also because my ex began dating my son's teacher last year and I know he's slandered me far and wide. The parent community in my son's grade has been cold-shouldering me, or so it seems to me. I have accepted that there really is nothing I can do about the situation. As well, I don't know if I really want these people to like me. I'd like it if they could at least look me in the eye and give me the same courtesies they'd give to any parent, but the damage he's caused is done. The only thing I can do is be a good mom to J., and involve myself in the school in ways that are meaningful to me, and that's working in the library and volunteering for Halloween and the Book Fair.

I don't want to hide in the comfort of an upper-middle-class elementary school community, but because it's my son's school I'd like to have positive relationships there. But those will take time, and they would take time whether or not my ex had slandered me.

Neither do I want to work for somebody else doing administrative work that doesn't hold any meaning for me. And I've noticed this year that when I have thought about and consciously asked to encounter the kind of people/relationships in my life that would be good for me, those people and relationships appeared.

I must trust myself. When I quit my job in May, my boss was so excited for me. I have to remind myself of the support and enthusiasm that he and my colleagues gave me, and I have to give it to myself.

[Kookaburra]

54. If your son's teacher had a lick of sense,

(and decency) she would get your son transferred to another teacher, and she'd be very wary of any man who insists on slandering his son's mother to his teacher. This is bad business all the way around. Is there any way you can get him out of her class, or even perhaps register a complaint with the principal?

[Dora]

55. Too late for that. This happened last year.

My son is no longer in her classroom.

I chose not to do anything about it primarily because I wanted to protect my son from his father's emotional instability. If I had complained about the teacher's relationship with my ex, I anticipated that it would have spilled out onto my son in ways that I didn't want to happen. It wasn't an easy choice. She was a good teacher in the classroom. Her character failings are her own business, and she will pay the price for involving herself with my ex, of this I am certain. As well, her relationship with my ex gave him the attention and sexual validation that he craves. That took some of the heat off of me. As well, I knew about the relationship only because I looked where I wasn't supposed to. To expose their relationship would also have exposed my prying, and that would have added grist to my ex's slandering. In sum, my decision wasn't entirely to protect my son, it was also to protect myself. I'm not proud, but I think that I made the best decision I could in a difficult situation.

I will talk to the principal, but I'm moving cautiously. School communities are strange organisms. I'm a teacher's kid - both my folks were teachers - and I grew up surrounded by educators. I'm not going to barge into the principal's office demanding reparative action. I don't know what her relationship with the teacher/parent community is like, and like I said - my primary concern is giving J. a stable learning environment. Creating an indignant scene is not going to help that cause.

And that teacher - she lacks all decency and has no sense. She dove headfirst into a sexual/romantic relationship with a student's estranged parent who was in the middle of a contested divorce. Her own ex-husband is in prison for attempting to kill her only two years ago. As horrible as that is (and I was horrified when I learned it) I think it's also very telling. I'm just guessing here, but I think she's a woman who is attracted to high-conflict personalities and sweet-talking abusers. She simply replaced the one she had with the one I divorced.

He's her problem now. And boy, will she have problems.

[WolverineDG]

34. People from my college years started cropping up in my life again

Not the most pleasant of times for me, either. I was in theater, doing well (I thought), got a serious boyfriend who then stabbed me in the back & humiliated me when we broke up. Whole lot of other bad stuff just dog-piled on me at that point & I quit auditioning & just got my degree & the hell out of there. In the interest of sanity, I just closed the door on those years & walked away.

Now that some of these people are back in my life (although tangentially via FB), old memories are surfacing. I did have some good times, but since those are surrounded by all the really bad stuff, it's hard for me to process. I keep imagining getting together with these folks to talk about old times & to put some things to rest, but I doubt that's going to happen. And it's hard for me not to do something without thinking "What will they think of me?" as if I need their approval. I know that I don't, but that thought keeps nagging me. Of course, they don't care; I'm sure one of them barely remembers me, even though we had some pretty major parts together.

So I'm left with feeling "Well, that's just the way it is" but not sure what else to do about it.

dg

[Ricochet21]

46. "A Course in Miracles"

would clearly say that they have reoccured so you could forgive it. That's not "forgive" in the Catholic "somebody did something to me" sense, that means letting it go. It's no coincidence.

Then, YOU are free of it.

[WolverineDG]

58. Thanks!

I'm working on doing just that. :)

BTW, found out in the paper that there are auditions tomorrow for a comedy.....I'm going, first time in 25 years I've auditioned for anything.....

dg

[rosesaylavee]

49. Well... taking the first step toward

that project I told you about 2 years ago. Starting a blog on August 29. Am giving myself permission to just start and not know all the steps as I go along... in fact, have decided to incorporate that message into my first post. I look at the draft and think, meh, what's the big deal been already kid? Just do it already! Ha.

Also working on starting a couple of other ventures. Was thinking maybe I should be a bit more cautious and start them slowly over a period of months but they too are things I have been sitting on for a year or more.

I am tired tired tired but have hope in my future again most days. And that's a good thing.

thanks for the thread Rick!

[FirstLight]

50. Feeling...hmmm...

Lots of stuff... My biggest issues with health and bad habits is like a one step forward two steps back, three steps forward thing...

went to the beach this week with a friend... and had a really bad time with my own inner body issues and cannot believe how OUT OF SHAPE I am...and much of that is attributed to the bad habits i am trying to break. So it kind of helped firm my resolve to step forward and get healthier...found a spin class at the community college, and that may be a good way to start sweating out the toxins!

I realized how much i procrastinate...on everything, but mostly on MYSELF. I kept thinking I'd put off my changes until... but there is no time like the present.

I slipped up and indulged last night and am shocked at how bad i feel this morning...but its a BIG sign that i need to keep on keeping on. I prefer to be clear headed and feel non-toxic when I wake up.

Kids go back to school on monday, that's a BIG relief, now I can get back into routine and move forward.

[kimmerspixelated]

56. I can certainly relate to many of the other stories/comments here.

And having read a few of them, I don't feel so quite alone...thanks for sharing! But this month started out with so much determination for purging, and so forth, and there was great progress, and then car troubles, I won't go into it much here but after much frustration, with trying to get a car inspected and recalls, we now have a useless lemon...the alternate car will be fixed, so there's a light, but the frustration of not having a vehicle just to carry the purging trash away, was a bit much...every little detail of all tasks related to our finances, vehicle legalities, etc. were show stoppers...

of course it's all very symbolic...still living under the same roof, movement plans not soon likely with finances the way they are..blah,blah...a settlement that was supposed to come I believe is possibly already spent, at any rate, at every corner for everything I've tried to do I find that all fingers are pointing directly at ...ME.. Kimmers you are on your own, here..EVERY single experience... Does the universe think I don't get it... I understand this, I get it! Not happy but I get it! I know, Ric, the universe doesn't think...HAHA! I really think I've accepted this..

But there have been interesting encounters of seeing old friends show up online, and it seemed bittersweet...I almost felt like..."This Is Your Life"..remember that old show??? And someone I had wanted to see at least a picture of, was found with a little digging..for years, I had been wanting to find this person..
Well, I realize I let the car stuff,etc. stop me symbolically, but the frustration level of the last weeks had put me in such a habit of non success, I became the person that's not getting anywhere...it seemed the steam I had just vanished , and I couldn't move, literally..

I plan to carry out a few tasks tomorrow towards my dream business, so at least I have a small goal. I know once any kind of ball gets going...I'll be a renewed person...

Wow, this was really therapeutic, thanks, ya'll!

[Ricochet21]

57. That'll be $150 NT

[kimmerspixelated]

59. Heh,hehheh.. you and everyone here are worth

at least 10 times that!

[Mnemosyne]

60. My daughter has shattered. I saw her last on Sat.@ 1 am. I managed to find a number she called from

my cell Mon. and called it, asked the guy that answered for her. She got on the phone, won't say where she is, when she's coming back or who she's been with.

I am both livid and scared to death for her and my two grandsons. I have my 10 yo grandson with me, because his father bullies him and is abusive. His brother, two, is with his own father (alcoholic and drug addict) and his fundamentalist family.

and then she said I'm just a drama queen...sigh.

I've kind of expected this since she was brutally attacked at both 14 and 17, then got involved with an asshole that cracked her skull on more than one occasion. She's been so tough acting, refused any counseling and informed me that testifying in court was all she ever wanted to say about it again.

Feb 3, 1979 - 4:22 pm

I actually finally realized I cannot save her from herself and am letting go of her pain. I cannot carry it for her any longer, nor be bullied verbally by her either anymore.

[Why Syzygy]

61. For someone

to look at her chart, go ahead and post her birth place.

[Mnemosyne]

62. Her car was in the driveway this a.m., haven't spoken with her yet. She was born

in Corry, PA. I'm afraid she will be gone again soon.

Thank you, Why Syzygy. :hug::cry:

[rosesaylavee]

63. ...

:hug:

so sorry for your pain in all this, Mnemosyne. Praying for you to feel some relief.

[Mnemosyne]

65. Thanks for the sweetness, Rose. Just was informed all of her actions

are my fault for being such a horrible mother. :cry:

[rosesaylavee]

68. Oh, then you can rest assured then

that that is not so. Seriously. Not so. That is something that someone says who is in pain and is inflicting it on a person they know loves them unconditionally. She may not even know that that she knows your unconditional love either so don't tell her this while she is ranting.

She is in need of counseling, no doubt. AND, as an adult, she has been in charge of herself since she hit 18. Tho what happened to her early on in life was tragic and awful, we ALL get varying degrees of awful and tragic and we can either choose to meet the pain and work it out or continue to let it ride over us. She is choosing the later more difficult way.

Best thing for you is to detach from this pain cycle as in that way, you may be inadvertently prolonging it for her. If you remove your cog out of the mix here, it may jar her enough that she can see it. YOU need counseling to be able to take of you in this.

Detach. Let her know that you love her unconditionally but DETACH. Disengage.

[Ricochet21]

64. I can't give social advise because I'm not qualified.

I am very sorry to hear all of this. Aquarians are hard-headed, so you have your work cut out for you.
Anything that split during the early day or for that matter in August is pretty much permanent, imho.

This all started when she went thru a trauma at age 2.5. Her chart is not that bad, i.e., she has the ability to work out of it but her pitfall is she sees what she wants to see, too much Sag. and she takes the easy way out. If it isn't FUN, she doesn't want to do it. Irresponsible.

She can make it out of this chart, I believe.
She's paying the price now for being lazy; once she gets past that, she can recover: if.


Best of luck. Actually, she's the drama queen

[Mnemosyne]

66. Thanks, Ric, hopefully I can move from this camper very soon. I realize I have enabled her

to continue to take no responsibility, by propping her up financially. My guilt over her father's suicide, the two attacks made me want to protect her, make her life easier, all it did was create a selfish, self-absorbed bitch.

I hope she does work it through, but she believes only a man will make her life right.

She just left screaming at me that her life is my fault for being such a terrible mother. She actually thinks she "just took a vacation" and now "I've ruined it by not being happy she had some time off", no connection with reality at all.

I can do no more and will not be bullied and verbally abused by her any longer.

Thanks, :hug::cry:

I will be making an apt soon for a couple in person visits. Estate near settled, finally, though won't be worth much with the economic disaster we are facing, it will get me through for awhile at least. I am fortunate.

[Ricochet21]

70. Hooray for your liberation

You're working with it now. This is what's best for her too, I think.
Good luck. :hug:

[Why Syzygy]

73. Dear Mnemosyne

No one deserves to be treated the way she is treating you. Tell that to yourself over and over. You did nothing wrong to
make her act that way.

A true victim is someone who blames their feelings and actions on someone or something else. For whatever reason, she is
choosing to be a victim right now. That is a very unhappy place to be. I've researched it enough to know that there are
many avenues someone can take to pull themselves out of victim-hood. It is not easy. And it has to be her choice ...

Bless you. Yes, take very good care of yourself, and remember, you do not 'deserve' this. Set aside guilt thoughts and
feelings.

[get the red out]

74. Yes, and

Allowing someone to harm you harms them.

[Why Syzygy]

75. I never thought of that!

hmm . Is there anything else to say about that? wow! That's a deep statement.

[GliderGuider]

67. "Own your new power."

I never believed any of this stuff. for 57 years I basked in blissful certainty that it was all woo.

That's all gone now, swept away by a single vision three years ago.

Now I know I'm not who I believed I was.

I know that the strange feeling of energy I always felt in my hands wasn't just some "sleight-of-mind" trick.

When the heart opens everything becomes possible.

Last night as I healed my twin flame's arthritic knee, I was told in no uncertain terms that I now have to take this talent "on the road" in at least a metaphorical sense.

I have no idea what this is, or how to think about it. My heart knows the truth, but my slide-rule-waving monkey mind is raising one hell of a fuss. Nevertheless, I've been told that I own it, and it's time to get on with the task at hand. No safe hidey-holes any more.

What a hell of a day yesterday was.

[Ricochet21]

71. Phenomenal Martian breakthrough

it's happening everywhere, good for you.

[I Have A Dream]

76. Wow.

I love how your journey is unfolding and the absolute trust you have in the guidance given to you.

Do you think that you'll ever write a book about it? With your writing talents and your ability to analyze each thing as it occurs, I think that it would be extremely valuable to many left-brained people who are trying to walk in the light and need inspiration.

[GliderGuider]

77. I've been thinking about a book for a while now

I started thinking about it almost ten years ago when I was in existential terror about the impending crash of industrial civilization and the death of everyone caught inside it. That would have made a real page-turner!

Every time I ask, "OK, how 'bout now?" the answer comes back, "Patience, grasshopper. You must wait until you actually have something to say."

So I just get on with life. To everything there is a season.

:hug:

[eilen]

69. Spent some time with my friend who was planning

a divorce a few months back and who I was afraid for her safety.

Well, she did ask for a divorce and is proceeding- has atty and the husband agreed to it but is currently prolonging the limbo situation.

Both are still in the same home.

Our conversation last night revealed they are still playing the game. She is clearly enjoying it although she says she wishes to be away from his energy, bothered by the intrusion of him physically and mentally trying to be in control of her.

Her focus is to retain her portion of assets, make him pay. I am concerned that when this Sagitarrien man stops believing the delusions he tells himself decides to take matters in his own hands.

I may not be the most practical person but seriously, if this was me, I would have disappeared with my kid a long time ago, only contact he would have with me is through my lawyer.

[Ricochet21]

72. A real good idea