Request: Can anyone help with a three-card spread?

[Mandate My Ass]

A little background. I'm currently at the 3 1/2 week point of a six-week introductory tarot course. I won't be able to get feedback from the group until Sunday if I should choose to wait, and then only if I should choose to share. For personal reasons, I'd rather not share this one with the group.

OK, the present. I got a call out of the blue today from an old partner (for want of a better word). He and I shared some great times but things just ground to a halt and he disappeared without a word. Not very nice but not totally unexpected as we never had an established relationship although we had a very deep connection. I drew three cards regarding his call:

1.) His motivation (Strength)
2.) My challenge (Justice)
3.) The outcome (The Moon)

OK, I harbor no illusions (haha) but if I read the first two as holding back my benefit of the doubt (which I'm inclined to do), then the third card makes little sense to me. If his motives are pure and I evaluate the situation incorrectly, then the third card must mean my own self deception but that reading of it doesn't sit well with me since I have mostly divorced myself emotionally from the situation and could only be deluded, in the sense I have of The Moon card, if I trust him again.

Further background. I must have had an intuitive flash about this person because on Valentine's Day I did a spread about how I had wanted the relationship to proceed vs. how he had and I drew The Chariot for me and The Wheel of Fortune for him. LOL. Nuff said.

Thanks in advance for any input you might offer.

[Dover]

1. A nice reading.....and opportunity!

The Strength card is also associated with lust and desire, and indulging in life's pleasures (as well as building the inner strength and courage to grow beyond the current situation). That's what he is bringing to the table.

Justice offers you the opportunity to rebalance this situation. Apparently it didn't end well the first time. Perhaps there is something unfinished or you need to make a conscious decision about the relationship from your new vantage point. He made the choice for both of you by disappearing the first time and denied you the option to share in that 'ending'. Don't worry so much about what HE wants or his motivations...just get clear about your OWN needs and feelings.

The Moon is about the past and old emotional situations can come up for review at these times. I see it simply as saying......'well, here's your chance to process some of those unfinished feelings'. The outcome is not as important as that process, so apply your energy there. If you aren't able to achieve the balance (indicated by the Justice card) then you may begin to deceive yourself about your feelings and the relationship.

[Mandate My Ass]

2. Ah, yes I see!

The moon and its cycles. I hadn't thought of the cyclic nature of the card. Yes, I believe you've nailed it right on the head. Perhaps I wasn't totally "over it" although I didn't then and don't now harbor any plans or hopes of starting things up again.

It had come to my attention that although this was a non-traditional relationship and one I considered myself "safe" in because of the little investment I put into the future of it, nevertheless an old self-defeating pattern of mine was present.

Thanks, Dover. :-)

I thought the strength card was him trying to sweet talk me out of what he perceived would be my anger but I like the lust angle better. LOL.

p.s. I did an energy spread the other day and it was very much about evaluating the missteps of the past and moving in new directions. I really like this tarot thingy.

[Dover]

4. The Tarot thingy

Yeah, I've found the Tarot and IChing (one often helping to clarify the reading of the other) so helpful, although it is sometimes hard to become objective enough with one's own readings to get the full benefit.

Sounds like you've got a handle on your 'patterns'...at least intellectually...ha! I've found emotions often have their own agenda. They guarantee a deeper understanding and do not allow my intellect to so easily side-step them with my brilliant analysis.
I call it 'experiential learning'..lol! I've had people and/or situations return just at a time when that part of my life and development that they played a role in, is up for readjustment.
The Moon, in many of my readings, is a signal that this is what's about to happen...my past pays a visit. The Moon brings opportunities for emotional/intuitive development which lends itself to lessons in learning to trust ourselves and others and become more receptive without fear of being decieved or falling into self deception.

[Cleita]

3. The Moon would put a big caution sign on my psyche.

Go into this with eyes wide open this time. If he disappears again you won't be surprised. I once had a relationship like this. He would disappear just as I thought the relationship was becoming serious like the moon disappears at the end of the month. When I got used to him being gone, he would reappear again. I sent him packing on his third reappearance. Years later I found out he had a steady girlfriend, whom he eventually married, and dated other unaware women like myself when he was on the outs with her.

[Nancy Waterman]

5. I agree with Cleita on this

The Moon is changable and emotional. You may go in with strength and clairty but you end up a little more emotionally involved and out of sorts than you would like. I would suggest keeping your expectations low. People tend to be consistent. If he disappeared once, unless there were really unusual circumstances, I wouldn't be surprised if he got cold feet again.

[Mandate My Ass]

8. Cleita, Nancy, thank you

Yes. I am being very cautious. This person hasn't demonstrated basic consideration for my feelings and thus the flashing "DANGER" sign is very apropos. The thing is, I could see us being fabulous friends. He is very liberal, very open-minded, intelligent and a joy to just sit and have a conversation with. He gives good, sound advice and won't let me get away with any B.S. either toward him or myself. Having a good B.S. detector is always a good thing, and mine is going off right now with his flimsy excuse for disappearing w/o a word. By his own admission, he likes the ladies.

He has come to a place financially, careerwise and otherwise where many of his friends are jumping ship and becoming repubs and he is nauseated by their actions and their attitudes. This is very admirable to me.

There is this strong attraction that would always be in the background though so therein lies the rub.

[Me.]

6. My Take

You have the ability/opportunity to put things right from your point of view, not necessarily his, and because that is so, the emotional satisfaction one normally has at the settling of something/anything will not be there and if you let it, it could confuse or cloud your judgment regarding the situation.

[Matariki]

7. The Moon

when i do readings, The Moon almost always seems to indicate confusion and deception. If i were reading these cards, i'd suggest caution. I'd say his motivation is quite strong - the name of this card in the Thoth deck is Lust. Your challenge - it could be that you should find a balance between your feelings and how you allow yourself to be treated, but my intuition is saying 'karma'.

There's a spread i use for relationships that i like a lot. Can't draw it here so I'll try to describe it.

Seven cards -

right hand column
1. (top card): partner's feelings towards you
2. (middle card): partner's thoughts about you (and relationship)
3. (bottom card): partner's actions - how he will act, his behavior in the relationship

left hand column
4. (bottom card) your feelings toward's partner
5. (middle card) your thoughts about partner and relationship
6. (bottom card) the physical nature of the relationship for you, also your behavior in this relationship

middle card between the columns
7. outcome

on edit - ps. I read the 'action' cards as being more in the future. For example, my ex - although the cards descibing his feelings and thought were quite intense and loving, the action card indicated that he indeed was going to break up with me and move a 1000 miles away. *Sigh*.

[Mandate My Ass]

9. Me, I think you're right. It's my time now, not his.

Kineta, here is the spread I did on Valentine' Day. I got it from Aecletic Tarot. Read it and weep. :o

1. How I saw the other person . The Fool

2. How the other person saw me. Strength

3. What I needed. The Star

4. What the other person needed. Ace of Rods

5. Where the relationship is now. The Hermit

6. Where I wanted to see the relationship go. The Chariot

7. Where the other person wanted it to go. Wheel of Fortune

8. Factors to be considered. Ace of Cups

9. The end result. The Moon

[Dover]

10. Kinda reminds me of the final scene in Annie Hall.......

ANNIE HALL
(Woody Allen 1977)


Voice of Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) last monologue:

"Tsch, whatta you want? It was my first play. You know, you know how you're always tryin' t' get things to come out perfect in art because, uh, it's real difficult in life. Interestingly, however, I did run into Annie again. It was on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. She had moved back to New York. She was living in SoHo with some guy. And when I met her she was, of all things, dragging him in to see "The Sorrow and the Pity." Which I counted as a personal triumph. Annie and I ...we had lunch sometime after that, and, uh, just, uh, kicked around old times.

(visual): Annie and Alvy catching up old times throughout the city.
(audio): Annie's hypnotic and beautiful voice earlier in film.]

After that it got pretty late. And we both hadda go, but it was great seeing Annie again, right? I realized what a terrific person she was and-and how much fun it was just knowing her and I thought of that old joke, you know, this- this-this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, uh, my brother's crazy. He thinks he's a chicken." And, uh, the doctor says, "Well, why don't you turn him in?" And the guy says, "I would, but I need the eggs." Well, I guess that's pretty much how how I feet about relationships. You know, they're totally irrational and crazy and absurd and ...but, uh, I guess we keep goin' through it because, uh, most of us need the eggs."

......................................


Also probably why our political system is so messed up...politicians, corporate sponsors, and the People too. Somebody always needs the eggs.
So the issue seems to be our appetites and desires and where they lead us, how they trip us up, throw us off our game...send us over the MOON.