My brain is starved and I need gold.

[onager]

a/k/a, time for another exciting episode of...Religious Right Radio Watch.

While running chores today, I felt the need for some Recreational Xianity and tuned in the local Fundie radio station here in Los Angeles. It is KKLA, and as I often rant, for consistency they really need one more "K" in that call sign.

This is the local home of "Dr." James Dobson, Jay Sekulow/Xian Lawyers of America, Xian Anti-Women of America, and my favorite show--the hilariously misnamed Intersection of Faith and Reason. Which is just as bad as you might imagine, given that pretentious moniker.

The modern St. Augustine who hosts IOFAR is a washed-up jock named Frank Pastore. He claims he was "an agnostic and atheist for 20 years." Both at the same time, I reckon. Assumed translation - he didn't think much at all about religion until he saw that Jesus paid very well.

I only caught part of a couple of shows today:

Show #1 - Buy gold, according to some hi-falutin' Brit-twit, who breathlessly announced that "Obama is frittering away your savings with his schemes to stimulate the economy."

"Your paper savings in the bank are evaporating right now! You need an asset you can hold in your hands!" (OK, I can't resist. The asset I most want to hold in my hands probably belongs to Scarlett Johansson...)

He wants to send you a free DVD and booklet.

Oh, his qualifications?

"I worked for Merrill Lynch and Morgan Stanley in Eng-UH-lund..."

:rofl:

Yeah, THERE's some great CV material in the current economic climate!

Show #2 - Your brain is starving if you are over 25, but you can restore it by feeding it...well, some BS "organic" concoction. (Natural/homeopathic cures are a BIG product on this station. Listening to it often sounds like somebody is reading the DU Health threads out loud.)

This "show" featured a man and woman, with the woman asking rhetorical questions and the guy answering at length.

To be honest, I couldn't follow his science-y explanations. They were all over the map and I'm sure a couple of them contradicted each other.

One jumped out at me, though: "Our brains are not evolutionarily developed for the stress of modern life."

I thought it was hilarious to hear the words "evolutionarily developed" on a station that spends much of its time attacking evolution.

Though to be fair, the other day I heard some expert on this station trying to square evolution with the Genesis fairy tale. He was greatly bothered by the words "the evening and morning were the first day." And IIRC, finally settled the question by saying "God is outside of time."

Oh. Well, that helps a lot.

[LeftishBrit]

1. "I worked for Merrill Lynch and Morgan Stanley in Eng-UH-lund..."

Err, that would be a pretty good reason NOT to trust someone. Eng-UH-land has been pretty well fucked up by those types already.

Is he a libertarian fanatic, or just a plain old con-man? And what was he doing on a religious channel anyway? Did someone mishear 'gold' as 'God'; or is he trying to sell both?

[charlie]

4. Cleanliness may be next to Godliness

but in the US, Commerce IS Godliness. Religious programming and snake oil hucksterism have been throroughly wedded since at least the 1930s, when they'd blanket the continent from megawatt Mexican stations with hellfire preaching, goat gland cures, Crazy Crystal tonics, and (I kid you not) autographed pictures of Jesus. They understand the credulity of their audience all too well. The religious market is probably one of the most profitable for gold buggery.

[onager]

5. Barely legal con man, I'm guessing.

Like the hucksters involved in your Enron/Bank of Scotland scandal a few years ago. I was wondering if Mr. Merrill Lynch/Morgan Stanley got out of the UK just ahead of an indictment. Or a Merrill-Lynch mob made up of former customers.

I started laughing out loud when he said that, probably surprising the other people sitting around me in traffic...

Charlie answered your question very well, so I won't belabor that point. Well, a little...

Though KKLA is technically a "religious channel," its advertising is a constant barrage of miracle weight loss products, patent medicines, get rich quick/get out of debt scams, ambulance-chasing personal injury lawyers, etc. Oh, and countless expensive weekend seminars to improve your relationship with your domestic partner or Jesus. Who often seem to be one and the same.

Sometimes the disconnects are hilarious. You might hear Dr. James "Dog-Kicker" Dobson ranting about anti-God lawyers ruining the USA, followed soon after by a commerical that begins: "Have you been injured at work? You have a right to financial compensation..."

[realisticphish]

2. yeah, our brains are over stressed

because running away from terrifying predators, working to exhaustion just to get a little food, living at a more or less constant state of hunger, that's the good ol' days!

[trotsky]

6. Ha ha!

Same thought that came into my head! Well you do know that back in those good ol' days, people routinely lived to be 206 because they ate only organic foods and never got any vaccines to poison them...

[salvorhardin]

3. "Intersection of Faith and Reason"

Faith U Reason = Ø

[moggie]

7. This show should come with a Venn diagram

As for Merrill Lynch and Morgan Stanley: they could have billed that segment Intersection of honesty and competence, which would have been exactly the same set.

[moggie]

10. That really didn't come out right!

Sigh. Perhaps Intersection of honesty, competence, and Merrill Lynch would be better.

[muriel_volestrangler]

8. I suggest colloidal silver for both problems

Where safer to store your rapidly appreciating precious metals than in your skin?

[moggie]

9. Until you turn blue

You might as well tattoo "I'm rich, please mug me and flay me" on your face.