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I'm about to make a NEW TOPIC POSTING (taa-dah) because we went to the family reunion and my husband's mother's husband is way into woo and vitamins and "becoming one with yourself" blah blah. He's a total bag of Douche and I hate the dude with all my ever loving soul. He's a consdescending asshole who fancies himself an expert on something because he read the wikipedia page...
anyway.
So I'm joking around and my mother in law asks if I'm not feeling well....No, I said. She asks if it's a cold, or if I have allergies. No, it's really a cold, more sinusy than anything.
So her husband with all of his wisdom says "Well, perhaps you need to TELL YOURSELF YOU'RE NOT SICK"...he pulled this bullshit years ago when he had a high paying jobs and Mr. Hed and I were just scraping by. TELL YOURSELF YOU'RE SUCCESSFUL AND WEALTHY....uh, okay. It doesn't pay the rent and is a bunch of psychobabble bullshit, but okay.
Well now he's in his late 70's, recounted yesterday how he's had TWENTY JOBS in TWENTY YEARS...don't feel bad for him. He's been fired or he's quit...never laid off. He's an insufferable asshole and no one can stand to work for him.
Now he's in his late 70's, working temprarily for barely above min. wage, won't look for other work that is "below his intellectual standard" (oy vey)....anyway.
SO he tells me yesterday TELL YOURSELF YOUR NOT SICK and I said "well, (name), MYSELF got sick of my bullshit when I spent years telling MYSELF I WAS SUCCESSFUL AND WEALTHY when i was making $4 an hour and living on ramen noodles and bologna. MYSELF thinks I'm full of shit, honestly"
So he goes on and on about THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING and prayer and vibes and light....I about died. I'm like (NAME) LOOK AT ME. Do you SEE the snot runnig out of my nose? CAN YOU SEE THE PROTRUDING GLAND ON THE SIDE OF MY NECK??? Would you like me to open my mouth and SHOW YOU THE PUS ON MY TONSILS? Because NO AMOUNT OF THINKING is going to make that go away. I can wish all I want and I'm still going to be stuffed up with shit running out of my head-holes.
You wish for getting better, and I'll be "alternative" and actually take MEDICINE.
shit.
So then my mother in law---love her, but she's kind of a ditz, says
"well, are you taking VITAMIN C, or VITAMIN D or ECHINACEA"
"well, I tend to stick with things that, you know, are known to work. The science is kind of out on those..."
"Oh, well VITAMIN D deficiency is known to cause ALL KINDS OF THINGS..."
I said "Hon, I LIVE IN FLORIDA. I go to the beach THREE TIMES A WEEK. I have plenty of Vitamin D...."
good lord.
Well no reason to make a new topic posting now, huh :-D
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